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Old 02-17-2014, 04:59 PM   #1
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Just a clothing whine...

I don't have very many clothes that I feel good in. My body isn't the "right" proportions, according to clothing manufacturers, so any jeans that fit in the waist are too loose in the hips/butt, and any jeans that fit in the hips are too tight in the waist.

My waist is 38" and my hips are 46". I bought I pair of size 16's and they are still too tight in the waist and give me a mean bulge when I sit down.

Today I am heading to Walmart, but I don't even feel like I deserve new jeans. I want to lose this weight, but I also want to feel like a decent looking human while attempting over and over to lose.

Has anyone else felt like this?

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Old 02-17-2014, 05:10 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by elisheva View Post
but I don't even feel like I deserve new jeans.
Friendly JUDDD BUDDY here checking in and telling you to stop that.

Be nice to yourself. You DO deserve a new pair of jeans, or that new shade of lipstick, or what ever! Just because! You're a wonderful person, who just happens to not be happy with their current body shape.

And that's okay. You're working at it.

One day at a time.
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Old 02-17-2014, 05:12 PM   #3
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I understand. I've lost 35 lbs and can still wear my 18W stretch jeans. My 14s are tight, and I have some 16 slims that I wear that are also tight. Most of my weight loss has been in my upper body, I guess, and some in my legs, but the hips are not going anywhere fast.

For me, a new pretty top with the same old jeans gives me a new perspective. You could look at some of the cute inexpensive tee shirts at Walmart for something that's new and won't break the bank.
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Old 02-17-2014, 05:16 PM   #4
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And I'll add this:

It's okay to curse clothing designers and current fashion trends! I know (and many others here will echo this!) what's it's like to just simply not feel attractive in clothes. Something's too tight, or if it does fit it's a hideous shade of chartreuse, who ever thought frills and buttons and lace ever went together on one shirt, darn! Why is this stupid bra so wonky?, these pants look amazing! Now if only I don't bend/sit/scrunch down....

I share in your pain!
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Old 02-17-2014, 05:19 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sunshine_icicles View Post

these pants look amazing! Now if only I don't bend/sit/scrunch down....
I was at JCPenney and tried on a pair of Ana somethings, and they were 14's. They fit, but that bulge wasn't worth $30
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Old 02-17-2014, 05:21 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sunshine_icicles View Post
Friendly JUDDD BUDDY here checking in and telling you to stop that.

Be nice to yourself. You DO deserve a new pair of jeans, or that new shade of lipstick, or what ever! Just because! You're a wonderful person, who just happens to not be happy with their current body shape.

And that's okay. You're working at it.

One day at a time.
Thank you :hug:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Librarygirl View Post
I understand. I've lost 35 lbs and can still wear my 18W stretch jeans. My 14s are tight, and I have some 16 slims that I wear that are also tight. Most of my weight loss has been in my upper body, I guess, and some in my legs, but the hips are not going anywhere fast.

For me, a new pretty top with the same old jeans gives me a new perspective. You could look at some of the cute inexpensive tee shirts at Walmart for something that's new and won't break the bank.
Some new tee shirts are a great idea. They are cheap enough to indulge.

I will try on a few pairs of jeans but not get too discouraged with the size. If they fit, then I don't care about the size.

I am a pear shape, my waist is only 2 inches less than my bust, and my hips are like 8 inches more than my bust. Something that will help is knowing that mid-rise and high-rise jeans work best, NOT low-rise because it becomes love handles galore.
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Old 02-17-2014, 05:55 PM   #7
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You are beautiful no matter what you are wearing.
Try to remember that, dearheart.
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Old 02-17-2014, 08:23 PM   #8
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So, I totally get not not wanting to spend a bunch of money on jeans you're hoping to just shrink out of in a month or so, but might I gently suggest you NOT get new jeans at WalMart if you're hoping to feel good about wearing them?
So I never realized what a difference it made to be in the right jeans but - HOLY COW! I would suggest searing the blog titled "Gap and Old Navy Make Mom Jeans" and then, when you're there, read her other posts about denim as well. She actually does a post on plus size denim that will blow your mind. The main title of the blog is graspingforobjectivity.
I like to search out my designer jeans finds at the local thrift stores. A bit more work but they end up being close to the same price as new jeans from WalMart and are a million times better. My current faves, a pair of Lucky Brand jeans (retail between $89 and $129 depending on the style) I got FOR FREE from a thrift store discard pile. There is nothing wrong with them except they're FABULOUS!
Anyway, my whole point, which I'm not sure I'm making well, is that the right jeans make ALL THE DIFFERENCE and you're not going to find the right jeans at WalMart. A little extra time invested and you will look and feel fabulous.
Its not you, dear friend, its the jeans. I promise!
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Old 02-17-2014, 09:15 PM   #9
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You are definitely not alone in those feelings! I'm a pear too, and getting jeans that fit the butt AND the waist can be a challenge! But it is the clothes' fault, not yours!

I used to love watching "What Not To Wear", and they always said you have to try on 8 zillion items in order to find what works for you. Trouble is, that is NOT fun to do, especially when you're not happy with your body at the moment. But it must be done. I agree on the thrift shop. It's a great place to find tons of brands and styles all in one place, and cheap too. Doesn't hurt the pocketbook so much when you shrink out of them, which you will!!!
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Old 02-18-2014, 02:43 AM   #10
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I loathe clothes shopping and rarely do it. One of the reasons I loathe it so much is that I've never, ever, fitted a regular size. My waist is usually gaping because I need the next size up to fit my hips. Tops never fit because I have to size to fit my shoulders rather than my bust. If a 'tailored' jacket fits my shoulders then it's a good 6-8 inches too large for my waist.

One of these days, I shall go on holiday to a country where I can have clothes made to fit me. Of course, I'd have to take advice on the style because I genuinely have no idea...
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Old 02-18-2014, 02:48 AM   #11
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I agree with the thrift store/ lesser expensive stores. When I lived in the US, I shopped at TJ Maxx, Ross, etc. Those places tend to have designer jeans for cheaper. I used to buy Levi's at Kohl's as well.
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Old 02-18-2014, 03:22 AM   #12
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Oh yeah. Standard clothing - especially from Walmart type places have never, ever fit me. Too much here or not enough there...depending on how you look at it.

BTW, it is not our fault. It is the fault of this idiot one-size-fits-all world we live in. As Yennie says, designer clothing tends to offer a lot more 'tuned' size choices. But there is no way I will ever spend full price on something as ephemeral as clothing...why, it usually wears out within 10 years (or gets something permanent spilled on it within 10 minutes).

Thrift stores, big box over-stocks like TJ, Kohls; yard and estate sales in up-scale neighborhoods, etc. When I worked, I always wore gorgeous, usually big name brand suits...that cost pennies on the dollar (just got a cocktail dress for $4.95 - it retailed last year for $750).

When I shop, I carry a tape measure with me just in case there is no way to try the clothing on.

And, as you say, know your style. Low-rise? Not on this body.
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Old 02-18-2014, 03:31 AM   #13
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And, as you say, know your style. Low-rise? Not on this body.
When I had to buy some 'fat jeans,' I had been wearing a pair of really soft, stretched-out skinny jeans. They were NOT flattering, but they were comfy. The DH insisted I get some boot-cut jeans. When I found a pair that fit, he got me to buy two pairs (they were cheap). As we walked to the car, he asked if I could burn the skinny jeans. Poor guy.
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Old 02-18-2014, 03:50 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yennie View Post
So, I totally get not not wanting to spend a bunch of money on jeans you're hoping to just shrink out of in a month or so, but might I gently suggest you NOT get new jeans at WalMart if you're hoping to feel good about wearing them?
So I never realized what a difference it made to be in the right jeans but - HOLY COW! I would suggest searing the blog titled "Gap and Old Navy Make Mom Jeans" and then, when you're there, read her other posts about denim as well. She actually does a post on plus size denim that will blow your mind. The main title of the blog is graspingforobjectivity.
I like to search out my designer jeans finds at the local thrift stores. A bit more work but they end up being close to the same price as new jeans from WalMart and are a million times better. My current faves, a pair of Lucky Brand jeans (retail between $89 and $129 depending on the style) I got FOR FREE from a thrift store discard pile. There is nothing wrong with them except they're FABULOUS!
Anyway, my whole point, which I'm not sure I'm making well, is that the right jeans make ALL THE DIFFERENCE and you're not going to find the right jeans at WalMart. A little extra time invested and you will look and feel fabulous.
Its not you, dear friend, its the jeans. I promise!
I agree with this. I love how lucky brand jeans fit and feel I buy them on eBay or at TJ Maxx. Also if you go to Target they have a wall of folded jeanjeans with specific styles and sizes the denzin brand ones don't work for me but I really love the mossimo brand but only off the wall if I buy the ones hanging off the racks the cut is not the same. A couple of tips I have picked up are, if your butt is big, look at the back pockets and don't buy them if the pockets are small. Also choose mid rise with a stretch fabric. Youll have a lot less of the muffin top.
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Old 02-18-2014, 03:54 AM   #15
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Also once you find a jean style that works for you its much more economical to buy multiple pairs. Stick with that jean type and it will always work for you.
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Old 02-18-2014, 04:25 AM   #16
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I always thought Lucky Jeans were for boyish figures. I've never owned a pair, but just got that in my head somehow. I've always had a pear shape and would love to know the best kind of jeans for me. I thought the curvy Levi's would be a great fit--not so.
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Old 02-18-2014, 04:32 AM   #17
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I went to the Lucky site and their description of curvy is not me. You have to choose between slightly curvy with a defined waist, or very curvy with a waist that's nearly as big as your hips or larger. My body is very curvy hips with a waist 10 inches smaller than my hips. Any suggestions?
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Old 02-18-2014, 05:33 AM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by elisheva View Post
I don't have very many clothes that I feel good in. My body isn't the "right" proportions, according to clothing manufacturers, so any jeans that fit in the waist are too loose in the hips/butt, and any jeans that fit in the hips are too tight in the waist.

My waist is 38" and my hips are 46". I bought I pair of size 16's and they are still too tight in the waist and give me a mean bulge when I sit down.

Today I am heading to Walmart, but I don't even feel like I deserve new jeans. I want to lose this weight, but I also want to feel like a decent looking human while attempting over and over to lose.

Has anyone else felt like this?

Do you ever tuck your shirt in? I ask because I also have an issue with my hips/waist ratio. It's not sooo bad now, but as I was losing, the only way I could get jeans to look good (and this is going to sound weird) is to buy them to fit my hips/legs. They would still be tight in the waist, so I'd take a rubber band and loop it through the button hole, then around the button. This would give an extra inch or more and some "give" or flexibility, so that there wasn't a muffin top, and I could breathe, but my jeans still looked great. I NEVER tuck in shirts, so the button/rubber band thing was always hidden.

Cindy, if you go into a Lucky store, the staff is really good about helping you select jeans for your body type. Try on a bunch, and you may be surprised to find something you love. Then you can look for them somewhere cheaper. I like my Levi's as much or better than Lucky jeans, so I didn't buy any, but the store I went to was awesome with customer service.
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Old 02-18-2014, 05:57 AM   #19
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Elish I'm way off from everyone. How about wearing a dress! I love dresses they r so confortable. I imagine u will get compliments galore, no matter our size...it works for me
No tightness anywhere. In the summer I wear them all the time.
Skorts r my favorite.
The only time I don't wear a drees is to the lake. But then it's bathing suit season with a dress like cover up. I love summer! I need summer
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Old 02-18-2014, 07:22 AM   #20
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I've got to try Lucky jeans. Maybe I can find some at my nearby Ross.

Cindy, I really think we're shaped similarly, and I love the fit of my Levi 550s. I don't know if they're considered curvy or not, but they work great for me.
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Old 02-18-2014, 07:45 AM   #21
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I can totally relate. I managed to get down to about 10 pounds above my pre pregnancy weight but then gained most of it back. I never ended up getting new clothes so everything I have is either still maternity, stretchy, or too tight trades from family members. When we get some extra cash I definitely plan on investing in some clothes that make me feel good now. It stinks to be having a great day, and doing great on your diet, but hate the world because your uncomfortable in ill fitting clothing. The world is a better place when I feel pretty I say invest in yourself. And don't settle for anything that you don't love now even if you don't like the size on the label. You can always by to fit your hips and look into having the rest tailored.
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Old 02-18-2014, 07:51 AM   #22
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hey! i like my Old Navy "mom" jeans

But seriously - they're the ONLY brand (the Sweetheart cut) that fit my tush, hips AND come up high enough on these high hip bones! And no they don't look "mom jeans"-ish
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Old 02-18-2014, 11:33 AM   #23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Librarygirl View Post
I always thought Lucky Jeans were for boyish figures. I've never owned a pair, but just got that in my head somehow. I've always had a pear shape and would love to know the best kind of jeans for me. I thought the curvy Levi's would be a great fit--not so.
I do not have what one would consider a boyish figure at all. On the Lucky website I have what they consider a "semi curvy" figure. I thought their descriptions of body shapes was a little weird but whatever. I also would never buy jeans online without trying them on first. I think you could go into the store and see what works for you, then seek them out online.

Quote:
Originally Posted by LadyKT View Post
hey! i like my Old Navy "mom" jeans

But seriously - they're the ONLY brand (the Sweetheart cut) that fit my tush, hips AND come up high enough on these high hip bones! And no they don't look "mom jeans"-ish
If they work for you, rock it! I used to only wear ON as well, until I got my first pair of designer jeans. Now the ONs are relegated to farm or messy work only. Not for public consumption. Seriously, I lose 10 pounds by switching from ON to Lucky or Hydrolics. I'm eyeballing a pair of "Sevens" but haven't gotten the courage to spend the money yet. Another 10 pounds maybe...

Also, places like Nordstrom have personal shoppers for free. You don't have to buy anything. They straight up say it on their website - they'll help you with whatever you want and you don't have to purchase a darn thing! I'm thinking of hitting them up, again, in another 10 pounds or so, to see what works for me in all types of clothing.
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Old 02-18-2014, 02:56 PM   #24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KeirasMom View Post
Do you ever tuck your shirt in? I ask because I also have an issue with my hips/waist ratio. It's not sooo bad now, but as I was losing, the only way I could get jeans to look good (and this is going to sound weird) is to buy them to fit my hips/legs. They would still be tight in the waist, so I'd take a rubber band and loop it through the button hole, then around the button. This would give an extra inch or more and some "give" or flexibility, so that there wasn't a muffin top, and I could breathe, but my jeans still looked great. I NEVER tuck in shirts, so the button/rubber band thing was always hidden.

Cindy, if you go into a Lucky store, the staff is really good about helping you select jeans for your body type. Try on a bunch, and you may be surprised to find something you love. Then you can look for them somewhere cheaper. I like my Levi's as much or better than Lucky jeans, so I didn't buy any, but the store I went to was awesome with customer service.
I had never thought to use a rubber band! You are absolutely brilliant, Dawn!!!

I am off to try this now and will report back
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Old 02-18-2014, 03:03 PM   #25
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So I did find a pair of Levi Strauss and Co. Signature jeans that I really like. They have a bit of flexibility to the waist band. I tried on the Boot Cut and they fit great, so I grabbed the same size of the straight pair. They are both 14 M (I would have gotten short if they had any), but the straight is a little tighter in the waist.

I actually plan on heading back to return the straights and get a different wash of the boot cuts. My friend drove me, so I was rushing and didn't realize they were the same wash.

I do usually head to the thrift store, but I don't usually have much luck with jeans. Shirts and sweaters - definitely! I am heading to Walmart tomorrow, and then to the thrift store, so maybe I will find one more pair of jeans I like!
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Old 02-18-2014, 03:28 PM   #26
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sunshine_icicles View Post
Friendly JUDDD BUDDY here checking in and telling you to stop that.

Be nice to yourself. You DO deserve a new pair of jeans, or that new shade of lipstick, or what ever! Just because! You're a wonderful person, who just happens to not be happy with their current body shape.

And that's okay. You're working at it.

One day at a time.
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Old 02-18-2014, 09:06 PM   #27
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I'm glad you were able to find some you liked.
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Old 02-18-2014, 09:38 PM   #28
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Yay! Gotta love those Levi's!
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Old 02-19-2014, 07:39 AM   #29
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I want some designer jeans now bad! I love the Express jeans featured in the article (but never see anyone above 25 in the store, unless they are a parent of a customer lol), as well as some of the other ones with white stitching. We don't have a Lucky store, nor any of the other uber expensive jeans stores. I would almost have to buy them online, or if I get extremely lucky, find them in Ross or TJ Maxx. Might look for some on Thursday (as I'm off work).
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Old 02-19-2014, 07:52 AM   #30
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: London/Herts UK
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WOE: JUDDD Maintenance. Ketogenic PHD.
Start Date: 11 Dec. 2011 Restart 1 Jan 2013
If you only need a relatively small extension at the waist, Wonder Button or Pant Extenders (the metal ones, not the fabric ones) can be useful. You pass the Wonder button through the buttonhole of the skirt/jeans etc. and then pass the button of the garment through the metal loop of the extender.

Dawn's rubber band sounds cheaper tho' and definitely more suitable for passing through airport security
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