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Old 12-17-2013, 05:40 PM   #1
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Fat Talk

I saw this on FB, and it is sponsored by Special K, but I think it really only expresses a very important message (and not products). Very thought provoking, and it nearly made me cry.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v...type=2&theater
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Old 12-17-2013, 05:51 PM   #2
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I saw that. I found this as well, which I was actually going to post as a separate thread but I think it fits so well here:

https://medium.com/human-parts/bf5111e68cc1

Its called "When Your Mother Says She's Fat"

Also very powerful.
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Old 12-17-2013, 06:20 PM   #3
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That's very poignant, Jen. I think most women and girls can relate, unfortunately.
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Old 12-17-2013, 06:22 PM   #4
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They both brought tears to my eyes.
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Old 12-17-2013, 06:30 PM   #5
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Cindy's link didn't work for me, but jen's link was moving and true to my life experience.
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Old 12-17-2013, 07:07 PM   #6
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Carly,
If you search Special K Fat Talk the YouTube video will pop up, if you can't find it on Facebook. Its worth searching it out.
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Old 12-17-2013, 07:16 PM   #7
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Does it not work for you either, Yennie? I can click on it and it works for me.
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Old 12-17-2013, 07:23 PM   #8
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Yes it did work for me but I thought I'd offer Carly another way to find it. I actually saw it cross my Facebook news feed and I skipped it. So one might be able to find it searching Facebook as well.
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Old 12-17-2013, 07:27 PM   #9
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I was able to read it. Thank you both for sharing...very powerful stuff!
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Old 12-17-2013, 09:48 PM   #10
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Oh boy. Those are both very affecting. I often wonder why we talk to ourselves in a way we wouldn't talk to anyone else, especially those we love. I guess that's part of the problem, we don't always love ourselves as we should. This really corresponds well with the thread Kissa has suggested - more positive self-talk. We need to do this!
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Old 12-17-2013, 10:35 PM   #11
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At first glance the Special K one is touching. But then you remember that it's just marketing, and they also want you to replace two of your meals with their crappy cardboard cereal so you stop being fat.

Last edited by Jez; 12-17-2013 at 10:36 PM.. Reason: Haha, whoops. My sailor mouth.
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Old 12-17-2013, 11:24 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jez View Post
At first glance the Special K one is touching. But then you remember that it's just marketing, and they also want you to replace two of your meals with their crappy cardboard cereal so you stop being fat.
I suppose it depends greatly on your point of view, and if you choose to view it in a positive light or a negative light.
I see nothing wrong with them using this marketing campaign to spread positive body images. So what if they're selling cereal to help people "stop being fat" - they're also spreading awareness about the damaging messages people are sending about themselves, to the next generation of girls (in the link I provide above) and to other women.
There is nothing wrong with striving to better ourselves while focusing on the positive. It is possible to want to lose weight without standing in front of the mirror and tearing myself down. Thats something I learned from my JUDDD friends. I still have goals and milestones I want to achieve but I'm in a much healthier place mentally while I'm trying to achieve them. Instead of focusing on the not-yet-flat stomach and the still-quite-full saddlebags, I'm able to view those "flaws" as hills yet to overcome while celebrating the appearance of tone muscle, the smaller jeans sizes, the complements, the thinner face. Instead of focusing only on the negative, I can be proud, so proud of what I've accomplished and encourage myself to continue to accomplish more.
However one chooses to better themselves & their health through weight loss - whether its strict low carb, IF or eating "cardboard cereal", our goals are all the same: a healthier, leaner self. Why not promote a healthier mental state while we're at it?
In the United States, the media is a powerful force and unless someone is willing to totally disconnect, it is unlikely that someone will rise above the influence. 99% of the messages sent via media are to sell something. All anyone does is complain about how the media gives a woman an unrealistic image of beauty and what she should look like. Yes, they're trying to sell their product, but they're doing in in a way that promotes positive body image and positive mental health and a healthier lifestyle.
I choose not to be cynical and acknowledge this company's recognition of the damage media & advertising can do to women. I applaud them for trying to make it better.
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Old 12-18-2013, 04:47 AM   #13
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Thanks for these posts! They both have strong messages to think about.

One thing it got me thinking about, was that you can want to change your body because you are dis-satisfied with it, without hating it, or shaming yourself.

Yes, I am overweight, and was more so, nine months ago. I would like to have less fat on my body. For different reasons. Health, appearance, ability.

But my body still does great things for me, even though it isn't in the condition I want. It moves me around. Does most of the things I ask of it. Gives me a place to display my great handknit socks. My husband loves it. It has nurtured three children. All good things.

I can appreciate those, even while I want to change some things about my body. I want to have less fat on my body. For health, for comfort. For ease in moving around. For looking great in clothes. And out of them.

I also wish my hairline were different, and I didn't have those two funny bumps on my nose.

I guess, for me, the impact of these two posts, will be to make sure just because I want to CHANGE something, doesn't mean I have to attack it and myself. Maybe it is tied up with the Protestant work ethic, the idea that virtue is connected to effort. If something is 'wrong' it must be because you haven't worked to fix it, and that's BAD, and means you aren't following the way!

Our 'defects' become connected to our worth as a person. And yet, so many of us put a LOT of effort into 'correcting' ourselves. The methods have just failed us.

I know for myself, I have worked very hard at dieting, for about thirty years. And it was always hard, and didn't work very well, until I found the right method. And now, it is suddenly easy. This doesn't make me 'better' or 'stronger', just lucky.

Okay, this has turned into a very disjointed post. I guess there are a lot of things to think about regarding fat-shaming/etc.
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Old 12-18-2013, 05:02 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sirtain View Post
Thanks for these posts! They both have strong messages to think about.

One thing it got me thinking about, was that you can want to change your body because you are dis-satisfied with it, without hating it, or shaming yourself.

Yes, I am overweight, and was more so, nine months ago. I would like to have less fat on my body. For different reasons. Health, appearance, ability.

But my body still does great things for me, even though it isn't in the condition I want. It moves me around. Does most of the things I ask of it. Gives me a place to display my great handknit socks. My husband loves it. It has nurtured three children. All good things.

I can appreciate those, even while I want to change some things about my body. I want to have less fat on my body. For health, for comfort. For ease in moving around. For looking great in clothes. And out of them.

I also wish my hairline were different, and I didn't have those two funny bumps on my nose.

I guess, for me, the impact of these two posts, will be to make sure just because I want to CHANGE something, doesn't mean I have to attack it and myself. Maybe it is tied up with the Protestant work ethic, the idea that virtue is connected to effort. If something is 'wrong' it must be because you haven't worked to fix it, and that's BAD, and means you aren't following the way!

Our 'defects' become connected to our worth as a person. And yet, so many of us put a LOT of effort into 'correcting' ourselves. The methods have just failed us.

I know for myself, I have worked very hard at dieting, for about thirty years. And it was always hard, and didn't work very well, until I found the right method. And now, it is suddenly easy. This doesn't make me 'better' or 'stronger', just lucky.

Okay, this has turned into a very disjointed post. I guess there are a lot of things to think about regarding fat-shaming/etc.
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Old 12-18-2013, 05:02 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yennie View Post
I suppose it depends greatly on your point of view, and if you choose to view it in a positive light or a negative light.
I see nothing wrong with them using this marketing campaign to spread positive body images. So what if they're selling cereal to help people "stop being fat" - they're also spreading awareness about the damaging messages people are sending about themselves, to the next generation of girls (in the link I provide above) and to other women.
There is nothing wrong with striving to better ourselves while focusing on the positive. It is possible to want to lose weight without standing in front of the mirror and tearing myself down. Thats something I learned from my JUDDD friends. I still have goals and milestones I want to achieve but I'm in a much healthier place mentally while I'm trying to achieve them. Instead of focusing on the not-yet-flat stomach and the still-quite-full saddlebags, I'm able to view those "flaws" as hills yet to overcome while celebrating the appearance of tone muscle, the smaller jeans sizes, the complements, the thinner face. Instead of focusing only on the negative, I can be proud, so proud of what I've accomplished and encourage myself to continue to accomplish more.
However one chooses to better themselves & their health through weight loss - whether its strict low carb, IF or eating "cardboard cereal", our goals are all the same: a healthier, leaner self. Why not promote a healthier mental state while we're at it?
In the United States, the media is a powerful force and unless someone is willing to totally disconnect, it is unlikely that someone will rise above the influence. 99% of the messages sent via media are to sell something. All anyone does is complain about how the media gives a woman an unrealistic image of beauty and what she should look like. Yes, they're trying to sell their product, but they're doing in in a way that promotes positive body image and positive mental health and a healthier lifestyle.
I choose not to be cynical and acknowledge this company's recognition of the damage media & advertising can do to women. I applaud them for trying to make it better.
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Old 12-19-2013, 05:23 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sirtain View Post
But my body still does great things for me, even though it isn't in the condition I want. It moves me around. Does most of the things I ask of it. Gives me a place to display my great handknit socks. My husband loves it. It has nurtured three children. All good things.
I don't know if you're familiar with

Tim Minchin "Not Perfect"

- there are several performances on YouTube. It's rather haunting and lovely and very much in tune with your words, particularly the section about living in his body. (During his London show, several women in the audience were sobbing during this section. Overall, it's humorous but parts of it are very affecting.)
Quote:
This is my body
And I live in it
It's [31 years and 6 months] old
It's changed a lot since it was new
It's done stuff it wasn't meant to do
I often try to fill it up with wine
And the weirdest thing about it is
I spend so much time hating it
But it never says a bad word about me

This is my body
And it's fine
It's where I spend the vast majority of my time
It's not perfect
But it's mine
It's not perfect...

This is my brain
And I live in it
It's made of love
And bad song lyrics
It's tucked away behind my eyes
Where all my [messed up] thoughts can hide
'Cos God forbid I hurt somebody
And the weirdest thing about a mind
Is that every answer that you find
Is the basis of a brand new cliché

This is my brain
And it's fine
It's where I spend the vast majority of my time
It's not perfect
But it's mine
It's not perfect
I'm not quite sure I've worked out how to work it
It's not perfect
But it's mine
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Old 12-19-2013, 01:56 PM   #17
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Wow, those two messages were just exactly what I needed to hear today. Thanks for posting them!
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Old 12-19-2013, 03:37 PM   #18
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Will watch tomorrow, it is late here now. Yippee another Yam Yam sighting.
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Old 12-19-2013, 08:13 PM   #19
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Will watch tomorrow, it is late here now. Yippee another Yam Yam sighting.
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