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Old 05-10-2013, 09:52 AM   #1
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Continue with maintenance, or lose more?

I think I'm making myself crazy with this question.

Since coming back from Las Vegas, and my 8.8 pound gain, I've been thinking I need to lose a few more pounds. My "low" weight before I left was 154.4 and I felt good. I came back at 163.2 and was back down to 155.6 after 3 DDs (on 5:2, so that was with more UDs than DDs in there). That's barely a pound over my low, but now I'm freaking out. My stomach feels huge and disproportionate. I know some of that's in my head, but I can't seem to shake the feeling that I need to lose more.

We are going on a short cruise in July, and I'm kind of thinking I'd like to be under 150 for that. Knowing me, and my OCD, that really means 145-149 as a maintenance range. That's at the lower end of a healthy weight for my height.

So now I'm kicking around a bunch of ideas. My options, as I see them:

Go low carb for a couple of weeks and see what happens - no rotations.
Go low carb for a couple of weeks with EOD rotations.
Go low carb for a couple of weeks with 5:2.
Go back to straight JUDDD with EOD rotations.

I can't really decide what to do. My problem is that, aside from my stomach and upper thighs, I'm very thin already. I'm worried that if I lose more, I'll be a bag of bones but STILL have a stomach!

I'm doing Zumba a couple of times per week, and have started hula-hooping as well, though I haven't gotten into a consistent routine with that. Short of a tummy tuck, I don't know what else to do. Surgery is not an option for me.

Then, there's the part of my brain that's saying, if you lose more, will you stop? I tend to have an "all or nothing" attitude, and I work really hard to try to maintain a sense of normalcy.

Anyone else struggle with this? How have you coped? I know, I know, first world problems and all that.
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Old 05-10-2013, 10:02 AM   #2
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Dawn. First of all, you are such an inspiration to so many of us. You have made this work, and been so successful, and you look fantastic. No, stop and read that. YOU LOOK FANTASTIC! Think of what you have accomplished!

Next, I do understand you're feeling like you have spots where you would like to lose. The fact is, you may not lose from those spots even if you keep losing. My recommendation would be that you hold steady where you feel good, and see what time will do in terms of re-proportioning your body. With your workouts and the new hula hoop routine, you may see real improvements in your tummy area over time.

I totally get wanting to keep losing. I worry that when I get to my ideal weight I'll still see a bunch of imperfections (I have the feeling I already know what they will be) and think that more losing will solve them. Unfortunately, I'm afraid that it won't.

Please, sweet Dawn, don't do that to yourself! If you really feel like there's more to lose, then only you know best there. Just be careful you don't lose too much and make yourself look, and actually be, unhealthy. We need you healthy and happy around here!
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Old 05-10-2013, 10:21 AM   #3
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If you need an option go with 4. BUT I am in the same boat that you are in. I like where I am but I still have some underlying fat around my waist and upper thighs. Exercise would probably be my better choice but I hate exercise. Should I lose more or just maintain? I am opting for maintaining right now but would not mind losing a few more.
My concern is the same as yours. A few more and then maybe a few more and then be too thin and obsess about it. Once we were fat and now we can't figure out if we are thin enough. It is a hard decision to make.
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Old 05-10-2013, 10:56 AM   #4
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Hi Dawn! I know I'm not active on this board anymore, but if that were my problem,
I would probably get down to 9 pounds below my goal weight. That way, when I got
back from vacation, and I had put on 8.8 pounds, I would still be .2 below goal, and
I could just go on, maintaining from there. Sounds easy here- don't know how it would
work out in practical terms?
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Old 05-10-2013, 11:43 AM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LoCarbGal View Post
Dawn. First of all, you are such an inspiration to so many of us. You have made this work, and been so successful, and you look fantastic. No, stop and read that. YOU LOOK FANTASTIC! Think of what you have accomplished!

Next, I do understand you're feeling like you have spots where you would like to lose. The fact is, you may not lose from those spots even if you keep losing. My recommendation would be that you hold steady where you feel good, and see what time will do in terms of re-proportioning your body. With your workouts and the new hula hoop routine, you may see real improvements in your tummy area over time.

I totally get wanting to keep losing. I worry that when I get to my ideal weight I'll still see a bunch of imperfections (I have the feeling I already know what they will be) and think that more losing will solve them. Unfortunately, I'm afraid that it won't.

Please, sweet Dawn, don't do that to yourself! If you really feel like there's more to lose, then only you know best there. Just be careful you don't lose too much and make yourself look, and actually be, unhealthy. We need you healthy and happy around here!
My rational brain agrees with you. My irrational brain is telling me that I've been maintaining for nearly 4 months and my stomach feels BIGGER than when I went into maintenance.

Quote:
Originally Posted by adillenal View Post
If you need an option go with 4. BUT I am in the same boat that you are in. I like where I am but I still have some underlying fat around my waist and upper thighs. Exercise would probably be my better choice but I hate exercise. Should I lose more or just maintain? I am opting for maintaining right now but would not mind losing a few more.
My concern is the same as yours. A few more and then maybe a few more and then be too thin and obsess about it. Once we were fat and now we can't figure out if we are thin enough. It is a hard decision to make.
You totally get where I'm coming from. What a pain! But I guess it's still better than still having 100 pounds to lose. Ugh.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pami View Post
Hi Dawn! I know I'm not active on this board anymore, but if that were my problem,
I would probably get down to 9 pounds below my goal weight. That way, when I got
back from vacation, and I had put on 8.8 pounds, I would still be .2 below goal, and
I could just go on, maintaining from there. Sounds easy here- don't know how it would
work out in practical terms?
That would put me at 140 going into my cruise, and I think that would be too low. See how insane I am?

Thanks for the input ladies! I'm still thinking, but may lean toward just trying to do more ab work, though it's hard with my bad back. I've been really enjoying maintenance, and I'm getting a little ticked at myself for living in my head too much. You all keep me grounded and sane. Thank you!
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Old 05-10-2013, 11:48 AM   #6
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One thing I've always been told about maintenance and time is that the body readjusts and reshapes. The silhouette may still be the same, in general, but the body fat that remains shifts to accommodate where the losses were greater.

I say give your body time to adjust to your new weight, and then go from there. You may find that things naturally shift, especially with exercise. You may find that it doesn't, in which case your options may be different.

I lost about 70 lbs about 2 years ago from anxiety. I then dieted down to 154, for a total loss of 83lbs. I've since gained almost 40 of it back (and then lost almost 18 again) but I gained those 40 over about 2 years. My point of this story, is my body is DIFFERENT than it was when I lost the weight the first time. Yes I'm a bit older, but I gained slower than I lost, and it accumulated differently. And it's going away differently than it did the last time. The fat that remained after I lost all that weight has shifted, so as I shrink again, my body fat is distributed differently.

I posted this in the NSV thread, but I'm about 20lbs higher than my all time low 2 years ago. I have hipbones I didn't at 154. I have collar bones that didn't show up until 160ish last time. So even though I gained, what I already had moved around. You may find that as time goes on, you'll see the same.

Either way, only you know what your body needs for you to feel good. If you decide to lose more weight, I would stick with what you know works and has worked so well for you this last year and a half. Either way, we are all here to support you!
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Last day of April: 180.8 (-7.8)
Last day of May: 174.8 (-6.0)
Last day of June: 163.6 (-11.2)
Last day of July: 162.2 (-1.4) [took a maintenance break for the month... Back into WLM for August]

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Old 05-10-2013, 11:56 AM   #7
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Lumina, I saw that in the NSV thread, and boy was I impressed! I have to dig around to find my hip bones!

But, I do feel like my collar bones, neck, chest and arms are thinner than I like. I sure hope this redistribution thing happens!
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Old 05-10-2013, 12:01 PM   #8
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Haha! I did too, 20 lbs down from where I am now. What's also weird, though, is I'm in bigger pants than I was at this same weight last time. I think it all migrated to my behind! Lol

I know this isn't HCG but I did do that for a little bit. One of the things they do is 'reshaping' rounds. There's also the story about a lady that was emaciated from the waist up and large from the waist down. The HCG helped reshape her so the fat was distributed differently.

That being said, I've heard and seen that this still happens with regular weight loss. Sadly, most of us start regaining almost immediately, if we even get to goal in the first place (I still never have) and our bodies never really get a 'chance' to adapt to our new weights for long.
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Old 05-10-2013, 12:13 PM   #9
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I'm coming up on my maintenance weight in about 6 pounds and I will still have my stomach to deal with to try and get rid of that fat repository. Even though I have fat to lose I'll be at the higher end of my ideal weight, but it is a good weight for my body type. I don't want to lose more, I have been down another 20 pounds (17 years ago) and that was way to skinny, but I want to do some recomposition, so my plan is to go into maintenance mode, 5:2 or upping my calories and continuing to exercise to try and achieve that recomposition eventually. I doubt it will ever be like it would have been if I hadn't been 155 pounds over weight, but I have the time and will to see how good I can be without getting too thin.

I have found that incorporating strength training, weight lifting, has really helped with the recomposition so far and is what I will be concentrating on once I get into maintenance. Maybe continuing maintenance and incorporating weight training would get you closer to your goals.

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Old 05-10-2013, 12:18 PM   #10
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Dawn, you look amazing. There will always be places we all wish we could change. I hate to even think of you constantly pushing to get lower and lower. My Mom did that 12 years ago. She got to Goal and then kept going. It was all not long after my son was born. As she kept moving lower and lower (never satisfied where she had WANTED to be) she noticed several things:

1) the more she lost the OLDER she looked
2) Wrinkles were an issue for her for the first time ever, not just little ones either
3) people that hadn't seen her in a while asked if she had CANCER and was on CHEMO (so not the compliment I would assume anyone would want)
4) and finally, she stressed about anything food related. Like vacation and events. No longer were any of those things enjoyable

One time I specifically remember standing next to her and hearing her tummy growl so loudly it started me. I was like MOM you're hungry. She was like, oh no, I can't eat. I have to keep my Points (she was following WW) in case I want them tonight.

Another time I remember her telling me a story of going to a buffet with my Dad. She ate a salad and then 2 (already dished out) servings of sugar free cheesecake. She told me she was so freaked that she ate 2 servings that she went to the bathroom and stopped short of making herself sick.

As her Daughter, I finally said , MOM that is an eating disorder. I said, I love you, but I have a new baby that I want you to be around for. If you don't wrap your head around this better, I will have no options but to push for you to seek MEDICAL help. I said, I want you around for your grandchildren and the way you are looking at food is more scary than any teenager obsessed with losing weight that I had ever seen.

I don't know if me saying did it or what. She did snap out of it. She started doing things more reasonable.

I will not presume to think I know all about weight loss, goal weights or what is going on with you. Here is what I see. You have had tremendous success with JUDDD. Why on earth would you even consider switching your WOE? Second, you are 5'9" small framed or big framed, I can't imagine 140 would ever be a desired weight for you (again, I am no expert). If you are able to add the exercise and are enjoying that and life.....why keep pushing? you look so good the way you are and LIFE is meant to be lived.

When in doubt, I always say to myself, if my DD11 was my age and was going through this what would I say to her? What would you tell your precious little girl? Would you tell her, KEEP pushing, that small layer of fat you see (that most would simply call skin) needs to be gone? Would you? I always pull it from what I would tell my child.

Does that make sense? Please do not think I am being rude of over stepping. You are one of MANY on this board that keep me going and give me HOPE! I hate to think that you would struggle like this and continue to torture your body and worse your MIND over it.
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Old 05-10-2013, 12:19 PM   #11
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Not that I get a vote but I would vote to continue down the same successful path you are on and give your body time to adjust. Good luck Dawn whatever you do!
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Old 05-10-2013, 12:30 PM   #12
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Dawn!

You look fantastic to me as you are right now, but I do understand wanting to see if a few more pounds will target stubborn areas. You sound pretty self-aware about going too low, so I think you'll know if that happens. If it does, gaining back a couple pounds could be fun.

p.s. I think the targeted ab work is a great idea. I'm sure there are abdominal exercises for bad backs somewhere on the internet.

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Old 05-10-2013, 12:34 PM   #13
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You are at a very hard point in a weight loss journey.


this is what happened to me

I lost 70 lbs pretty fast on LAWeightLoss. I did very well.

I got to size 10/12. I was thin. I looked good. I had some squishy parts and some bloat like you mentioned and jiggly arms still---but I was thin. I am taller at 5'8 so the 70 lbs gone made me long and lean actually.

WAS I HAPPY ENOUGH???? when I should have been? NOPE

I decided to try for a size 8. I had to starve to get it. I got into a size 10 alone but couldn't get into the 8. I started at almost a size 20. If I ate one grape I went up to a size 10/12 mostly

I felt defeat.

The WHOLE time I should have been seeing a victory. I felt defeat. I never once acknowledged my accomplished. I dropped 1/2 my clothing size. 20 to 10. When someone gave me a compliment (and I got alot of them), I never once said thanks or took credit for having completed this journey. I said, oh I need to lose a bit more. Just a little more and I will be happy.

WHAT A MORON I WAS!

The more I tried to lose----the more I started to gain. AND THEN the who cares, why is this so hard, I can't do this and more negative thoughts came in.

I gained 50 lbs back.


This is the 50 I am here to lose again


At some point WE MUST BE HAPPY ABOUT OUR ACCOMPLISHMENT. WE MUST LET GO OF the weight loss journey and relax.

I didn't do it. I was right where I should have been but it wasn't enough in my stupid brain. I did myself in one negative thought at a time.


I said if I ever get into a size 10/12 again I am done. done and maitaining and never ever going to wish for 1 more lb off. not going to do anything that is weight related other than to stay put in that 10/12.

most I will do is some toning and buy clothes that flatter my body and hide a few jiggly parts. I am 51 and I can't be a twig supermodel. My mind has to accept that and at this point when I hit my goal size of 10/12 I am done and done and done I will never allow myself to gain again.

It feels great to mention this on a thread because it stilll bothers me to this day that NOT getting off a few more lbs to drop one size is what literally wiped out my accomplishment of 70 lbs gone, dropping 1/2 my clothing size and gaining 50 back--all because I said I wasn't done. I wasn't happy.

I know better now. Seriously. I can never let what happened after my first weight loss ever again cause me grief.

I mention this because never acknowleding how well you did, how healthy you are, how good you look etc. can make one backslide very fast. All because you feel like you failed anyway, why bother keep trying? I never thought that would happen to me but it sure did.

now I have a goal and when I hit that goal of size 10/12 I will stop and maintain for at least 1 year. then after that year of maintenance under my belt, I will re-evaluate.

I know I can't do this again. I can't lose 70 lbs, 50lbs over and over again. I just can't.
I have to m ake it work this time and be happy!!
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Old 05-10-2013, 12:44 PM   #14
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I would go with option 4 also!! I think you look great where you are. You might still be a bit bloated from your trip. Even with a few DD's in there, the bloat feeling will stay a little. I think if I was in your shoes I would do lemon waters and do normal rotations til you feel better!

I was reading about weightloss wraps....its all over my facebook. But I found a do at home recipe for those weightloss wraps. It seems messy but I am half tempted to try it when its time for the pool to open. Suppose to help with tummy bloat.....I am sure once I eat it will come back on but hey worth a try....just search homemade weightloss wrap and see what comes up....I know its like epson salts, a white t-shirt and a few other things!!
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Old 05-10-2013, 12:50 PM   #15
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Old 05-10-2013, 12:55 PM   #16
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Trigger's post was great. Completely agree!

Dawn you look frigging fabulous, but none of us live inside your head or with your body. I say do whatever feels right for you.

What ship are you going on and where are you heading in July? My parents have been doing three cruises a year since 1993 so now that's what all my vacations entail. I'm counting down the days until my cruise in December.
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Old 05-10-2013, 01:34 PM   #17
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thanks. I still get upset knowing I was there, at goal. and lost it so easily.

One thing KierasMom. have you truly enjoyed what you have lost? Have you stopped and acknowledged how well you have done? where you are at in the present?

I will next time definitely


but it is so personal. Do what you need to do to help yourself get a handle on this. I am already training my mind for when I hit goal again. things will be so different this time lol
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Old 05-10-2013, 01:39 PM   #18
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Dawn I can totally relate- totally...
I've said I'm going to stay in maintenance for a while longer, but ideally I would like to lose some more belly fat. Like you though I'm afraid it will come from other places where I can't afford a loss- namely my very bony butt and scrawny chicken legs. I think you look fabulous, but I know I look fine when I'm dressed, but undressed is another story. I've been under 115lb as an adult (30-31), but I'm not sure if I can pull it off 6 years later. It's also hard for me to tell what is loose skin and what is fat. If I choose to lose more I will go back to eod juddd rotations. That worked great before and I'm sure will work again, but I'm going to give my loose skin and body some more time to adjust. Listen to your heart... if you are unsure, I say, wait. If you deside it's right for you, you probably won't have misgivings and will just do it. I think you are asking us, because you are not sure and this should be something you are sure about.
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Old 05-10-2013, 01:51 PM   #19
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Dawn-

I'm very impressed that you are able to recognize in yourself the possibility that you may take it too far. It is true that this is how many eating disorders start.....by not knowing when to stop.

I agree with not mentally torturing yourself. If you feel good, this is a good weight. Be a happy mom and good role model for your daughter.

And yes, being super thin does not mean the bits you don't like will necessarily go away. Smart exercise goes a long way to giving a balanced body. Not just in your actual shape, but also in how you carry yourself. A strong body is a confident one.
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Old 05-10-2013, 02:04 PM   #20
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Wow, I went to lunch and came back to all this great advice. Carly, you're right, I'm just not sure.

I'm VERY happy with how far I've come, but I've let the niggling doubts creep in, the "what-ifs" and the desire for the next size down. I am very aware that I have compulsive tendencies, so I really try to pay attention to what's "real" and what's "in my head." I fear that my discontent with my stomach is really just my OCD raising its ugly head. I'm thinking I need to put that OCD to work with exercise.

I really appreciate all the feedback. I'm honored that you've all taken the time to give me your advice and well thought out responses. It really warms my heart that you're all so wonderful!

I was on the ledge, but I am slowly backing away. When I went into maintenance, I planned to stay there for a year before reevaluating. I'm not sure why I'm having a hard time sticking with that, except that my jeans felt a little tight yesterday. How silly.

When I take a step back, out of my head, and try to be objective, I like where I am. I'm tall, 40 years old, a mother, and I fit in size 8 jeans! Why do I want to fit in size 6 so badly? I don't know. I'm going to work on that. I also spent some time this morning on-line looking at swim suits. Ugh. That'll make the best of us self-conscious, I suppose.

Okay, deep breath! I will NOT try to lose more. I WILL try to do more ab exercises. I WILL think about building muscle instead of losing fat. I will NOT obsess over the number on the scale or on the tags in my clothing. I WILL appreciate how far I've come and do my best to accept where I am.

Thank you BUDDDs.
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Old 05-10-2013, 02:17 PM   #21
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Originally Posted by LiLi914 View Post
Trigger's post was great. Completely agree!

Dawn you look frigging fabulous, but none of us live inside your head or with your body. I say do whatever feels right for you.

What ship are you going on and where are you heading in July? My parents have been doing three cruises a year since 1993 so now that's what all my vacations entail. I'm counting down the days until my cruise in December.
We're going on Carnival Inspiration, the last week of July, 3 days to Mexico. With all the bad things that have happened, we're hoping for the best!
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Old 05-10-2013, 02:29 PM   #22
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Dawn, when you posted your vow renewal photos, one really stood out to me. It is the one with your BFF. When I looked at that, my first thought was how small your tummy looked! If it looked any smaller, you would have looked concave! I would pay good money to have your figure! it! But, since I'm 70yo, and only 5'3", I know that will never happen, so I will just say, enjoy where you are, and try not to spend your whole life (like I have) obsessing over your body and your diet.

Carole
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Old 05-10-2013, 02:30 PM   #23
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Dawn, you look incredible!!

I recommend trying to incorporate some strength training

I did the 30 day shred by Jillian Michaels and it really transformed my body! Everything much more tighter. Its on youtube too!!
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Old 05-10-2013, 02:39 PM   #24
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Originally Posted by KeirasMom View Post

Okay, deep breath! I will NOT try to lose more. I WILL try to do more ab exercises. I WILL think about building muscle instead of losing fat. I will NOT obsess over the number on the scale or on the tags in my clothing. I WILL appreciate how far I've come and do my best to accept where I am.

Thank you BUDDDs.
I love this! It sounds smart, and wise, and wonderful. You've lost amazingly and you're maintaining amazingly and you're in a great place.
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Old 05-10-2013, 02:51 PM   #25
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you're backing away from the ledge LOL good for you!

slowly think what you want. just cause the jeans are a tad tight, you know a down day or 2 will take care of that. Don't let the small little things snowball into huge insecurity problems.

also, bathing suits do most people in, haha, and I know that feeling. I will be shopping for a new one in a few weeks. I bet I come away with all kinds of warped feelings after that
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Old 05-10-2013, 03:01 PM   #26
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When I take a step back, out of my head, and try to be objective, I like where I am. I'm tall, 40 years old, a mother, and I fit in size 8 jeans! Why do I want to fit in size 6 so badly? I don't know. I'm going to work on that. I also spent some time this morning on-line looking at swim suits. Ugh. That'll make the best of us self-conscious, I suppose.

Okay, deep breath! I will NOT try to lose more. I WILL try to do more ab exercises. I WILL think about building muscle instead of losing fat. I will NOT obsess over the number on the scale or on the tags in my clothing. I WILL appreciate how far I've come and do my best to accept where I am.
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Old 05-10-2013, 10:43 PM   #27
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Trigger, great post! I think I am going to copy it and save it somewhere to re-read when I need to get my head in the right place. Some of the stuff you said can apply to when losses slow down as well...which is when I need the inspiration!

Dawn, clearly I'm Miss Tardy to the Party here & you've already gotten fabulous advice. I read somewhere, I think the Stillman's board, that you have to "maintain" 4 days for each pound you lose before 1) your body accepts it and 2) you're done "reshaping" from the losses. Things are and will continue to shift for you, I'm sure of it. I think exercise and toning is absolutely the way to go, and I'm glad our fellow JBs were able to help get you to a place where you could feel that too.
Hugs! I think you look fabulous!
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Old 05-11-2013, 07:04 AM   #28
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Quote:
Originally Posted by arkie1 View Post
Dawn, when you posted your vow renewal photos, one really stood out to me. It is the one with your BFF. When I looked at that, my first thought was how small your tummy looked! If it looked any smaller, you would have looked concave! I would pay good money to have your figure! it! But, since I'm 70yo, and only 5'3", I know that will never happen, so I will just say, enjoy where you are, and try not to spend your whole life (like I have) obsessing over your body and your diet.

Carole
Hehe, that was all thanks to great shapeware and the fact that my BFF is pregnant. Her little baby belly makes mine look smaller. But you're right, when I look at those pictures, I see how far I've come, much better than when I stare at myself in the mirror or look down at my pooch in person. My head is a crazy place to visit. Thank goodness you all don't have to live here full-time!

Thanks again everyone. I'm feeling better today. As an aside, TOM decided to visit this morning, so that was probably part of the bloat and the negative feelings. I'll sure be happy when he takes a hike for good!
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Old 05-11-2013, 08:36 AM   #29
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yennie it is so true. when ya get to maintenance, it is a whole 'nuther set of problems that set in I had no idea. I thought hit goal and be happy as a clam. BOY YA GOTTA WORK on that beginning of maintenance just as hard as losing.
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Old 05-11-2013, 08:38 AM   #30
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Originally Posted by KeirasMom View Post
As an aside, TOM decided to visit this morning, so that was probably part of the bloat and the negative feelings. I'll sure be happy when he takes a hike for good!
I thought that also. I am so thrilled I don't have to deal with it again in my lifestime THEN THE OTHER problems kick in. Love my hot flashes, cold chills and mood swings. hey, whats not to love about those
LOL ---but really I noticed huge changes of being better thru some of the mena problems just by eating better so in a way I am winning
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