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Old 03-07-2013, 01:28 PM   #1
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35 Weeks on JUDDD -- Holding

Today I weighed in at 252 lbs for a loss of 0 lbs this week, a total of 38 lbs lost, 34 of them on JUDDD.

So, I'm a whole month past my book deadline, my excuses are all gone and the weight isn't falling off like it used to. I've got nobody to blame but myself--more on that below. And I feel like I should be blaming myself and kicking myself into gear, but instead, I'm remarkably at peace with the progress I'm making. Hopefully I can explain it below.

Here are the upsides and the downsides...

Upsides


Reality. Today I read an article on alternate day fasting that said it wasn't appropriate for "reality" and "real life" because it was easier to plan and eat a healthful and balanced meal every day that would allow you to go out with a friend for impromptu Sangrias than it was to stick to your down day if faced with the same impromptu Sangria fest. And upon reading this hogwash, I laughed out loud. Never in my life--never in my whole life--has it ever been easy to fit a social event around a 'healthful and balanced' meal plan. I have tried it with Weight Watchers points (and been miserable and deprived), I have tried it with Atkins (on which the Sangria would be banned from the get go), I have tried it on Nutri-System, on Cabbage Soup diet, on every stupid plan you can imagine, including the one where I was taking drugs that could have damaged my heart. I've done it for years and years on end. And yet, only on JUDDD have I ever been able to join weight loss with reality. On JUDDD, it's a fifty-fifty chance that the impromptu social event is going to be ridiculously easy. And if it's not, at least I know going into the thing, that I'm not to even sniff at the Sangria. This week I had a book signing with champagne, a high tea with friends, a gourmet lunch with colleagues, and two impromptu dinners out. And I maintained my weight. This is reality for me.

Happiness. I've touched on this before, but it's still true, and I can't say it enough. I'm pretty much happy on this diet all the time. Either it's a down day and I'm super productive and know that I'm losing weight, drinking lots of tea and pampering myself...or it's an up day and I'm either eating delicious foods that I've planned in advance, or whatever appeals to me at the time on a whim. This is true whether I've got free time on my hands or whether or not I'm stressed out of my mind with work. It's true on weekdays and weekends. It's true on holidays. It's true at home or at work meetings. Most of my life has been ruled by either long periods of deprivation-related misery or long periods of wild happy food binging to be followed by guilty-food-related misery. If I'm in a bad mood now, it's because a publisher has given me an unreasonable deadline, or I've had an argument with my mom, or because my husband's horrible cat vomited on the rug AGAIN.

Letting Go of Perfectionism. Every down day is a lock. I've got it. Every up day isn't. But some mornings I wake up on an up day ready, willing, and able to be a warrior woman and keep to my calorie counts. Some up day mornings I wake up and know that I'm going to eat 1,000 calories before lunch. By letting go of the perfectionism that says "I'll just start again Monday when I can do this diet right" I have found a way to succeed. And that path to success is apparently, "Start again right now and keep doing it, whether you have a perfect day of clean eating or a sketchy day of chocolate and chips." This is the JUDDD calm, I guess.

Downsides


On the Other Hand. Maybe someone would look at this entry and see it as proof that this was when I allowed complacency to set in and stopped caring about my goals. Because, really? I have a lot more weight to go and this last ten pounds has taken a lot longer to shed than the first thirty. At this rate, it might take me the rest of the year to meet my next goal. And while that's better than gaining, I need to do more for my health. But, weirdly, I have a strange sort of faith that I will. Maybe that's the downside of the JUDDD calm or maybe it's because I look at my calendar and I see the weeks that are going to be a struggle just to maintain (conferences, travel, social engagements) and lots of weeks where I'll have the opportunity to kick WLM into high gear.

Adjusting to a New Body. My husband is constantly pointing out the changes in my shape. My need for new clothes is outstripping my time to shop for them and my budget to buy them. I'm also a lot more energetic than I used to be. I run up and down the stairs. I feel peppy. And I have an unhealthy overestimation of my physical abilities. Example: This week during an event in Historic Frederick, I got caught in the crosswalk when a street sign changed. I decided to SPRINT across the cobblestones to the other side of the road, tearing my calf muscle in the process. I'm feeling fine, it's healing nicely, I'm not in any pain and I was even able to use it in a class I teach as an example of how to demonstrate character flaws, so no need to worry about it at all, but it was a wake up call that I am a long way from the end of my fitness journey.

Last edited by stephdray; 03-07-2013 at 01:49 PM..
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Old 03-07-2013, 01:33 PM   #2
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Im so proud to read this post Steph.. You have been on a remarkable journey and i have so enjoyed goin back to your first posts and reading how you never thought this was possible and yet here you are.. a warrior! This has been a awsome entry in your weight journey and i am proud of how far you have come Much love and respect
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Old 03-07-2013, 01:51 PM   #3
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Love reading these posts. You WILL reach your goal, and continue to learn so much about yourself in the process.
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Old 03-07-2013, 02:47 PM   #4
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Thanks, Steph. I look forward to reading your posts every week, and they never disappoint me--there's always material that I can learn from, relate to, and/or applaud.
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Old 03-07-2013, 02:49 PM   #5
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I look forward to your posts each week with the same enthusiasm that I awake my favorite author's next book...wait? Coincidence?
Anyhow, you somehow, each week, manage to echo thoughts & feelings I am having but in such a more elegant way! Last week-end was my first 4 day off plan and I DID NOT GAIN!! I was so ridiculously excited to get on the scale and see the same number as before I went out of town that I almost cried! And I'm going off plan for Fri-Sat-Sun and, you know what? I'm remarkably chill about it. On Atkins I would be freaking OUT!
I love your posts and stories. Thank you for blessing us with your gift of eloquence!
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Old 03-07-2013, 03:21 PM   #6
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Steph, what a phenomenal post. It's such a priviledge to be part of such a group as this one, and get to listen to each others' stories.

We are weaving a coat of many colors here in this JUDD thread. We all have our own unique situations, and we help each other through them. Each strand makes our coat stronger and more beautiful.

I find it quite interesting that even in the downside points, they are riddled with positives. Your ability to plan around events and not have unrealistic expectations, your DH constantly pointing out your body changes (I am jealous!!!) and your ability to turn a pulled muscle into a teaching opportunity.

Thank you for sharing all that you do! It's very appreciated!

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Old 03-07-2013, 03:22 PM   #7
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Thank you SO much for this post! I'm having one of those UD's where I feel like a failure and your post helped me "remain calm".

I'm new to this WOE and having someone like you take the time to post your thoughts and feelings is wonderful.

Hope your calf heals quickly. Take care!

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Old 03-07-2013, 08:07 PM   #8
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Yes, yes, yes, yes and yes! Lol. I have read a dumb article about fasting too, that it isn't plausible, realistic, blah blah blah, and it reminded me of high school when I had to write a paper, and made stuff up when I didn't know the subject matter lol
I am happy too. Other than the occasional UD let downs:/
I love that you sprinted across the street, but I'm sorry you got hurt I hope you will be sprinting, or at least jogging in no time

(The juddd calm is a real thing, huh? I think it is a good thing)


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Old 03-08-2013, 05:23 AM   #9
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Thank you for another great update. I know you will reach your weight loss goals and right now you are juddding and living life. That is another great part of this WOE... life doesn't have to revolve around it if you don't want it to. I get a bit miffed when one of the cats vomit, too (like on the couch )
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Old 03-08-2013, 07:10 AM   #10
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The 5th law of the universe is that cats will vomit at the most inconvenient time in the most disgusting place. It's proven fact. And the more irritating the cat otherwise, the worse the location of the vomit.
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Old 03-08-2013, 07:34 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yennie View Post
The 5th law of the universe is that cats will vomit at the most inconvenient time in the most disgusting place. It's proven fact. And the more irritating the cat otherwise, the worse the location of the vomit.

Case in point: Kasey awoke us at 4am with a hairball; on the bedroom carpeting, of course. UGGGGGGGH!
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Old 03-08-2013, 10:56 AM   #12
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I think Adjusting to a new body goes under upsides, not downsides.

I went through about 3 months at the end of last year where I semi-maintained, and actually slowly gained, about 10lbs.
Granted-- it was almost expected... Canadian Thanksgiving, then 2 weeks away at an all-inclusive for my 40th bday and my DHs b-day too, then right into the Holiday Season...

But, like you, I *knew* I'd get right back into JUDDD at the top of this year, and I have, and I'm fine.

So, just a word of semi-caution. Make sure you are truly maintaining, and not quietly gaining, b/c while taking off the weight won't be terribly difficult (as opposed say, to getting back into ketosis on LC), you won't be happy re-losing even JUDDD weight.

That said-- there are times when life gets in the way, despite our best plans and intentions and food trackers and all. I have concerns myself about my 1x a month business trips and then a week long conference in May, and undoing all the good I'm currently working so hard for. (almost said: hard on... )
Ahem...

As usual Steph, I see so much of what I'm going through in your post, and I just you for taking the time to verbalize it. And I gave you credit on FB for being public about hitting a major goal/amount lost and announcing it-- I'm sort of amazed at the replies I've gotten, and I wouldn't have posted (in public, since I consider LCF "private" were it not for you!).

Hugs to you my friend. You will get where you want to go. And I know you want it to happen faster, but I really truly think, better slower and for real (yo) than not at all.


S.
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Old 03-08-2013, 10:57 AM   #13
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Hey there Peppy Girl Steph!! Wow! What a great post!

I love that you are running up and down stairs. Love that your DDs have become so productive (I remember in the beginning they drove you a little nuts but you got it figured out! Yay you!)

Congrats on needing new smaller clothes. Woo-Hoo!

I was thinking about how you said losing this last 10 pounds took a long time. Gosh, I'm giving myself a break because the holidays really got me this year. They came after 6 consecutive weeks of travel. I just about got the holiday gain off and we were flying away again for another vacation so I'm working my way back down to my stats again. (I refuse to up the stats when I know I'll be back there in no time. Getting very close).

You had the holidays, deadlines, social commitments. I can't believe you lost pounds in the midst of all of that. I applaud you!!

Ahhhhhhhhwwwwwwwmmmmmmmmm...the JUDD calm. I do love it. I'm feeling the energy and the calm at the same time this week. I love how easy it is to get back into JUDDing even after weeks away from it. It's almost hard to believe and too good to be true. I'm sailing along with 2 great DDs and 2 pretty good UDs in the books for this week. Today is going to be a very satisfying DD where I'll have plenty of energy for chasing around my grand kids!

This is a terrific WOE and reading your update reminded me of how glad I am to have it and to have you and all my JUDD BUDDS!
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Old 03-08-2013, 11:00 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yennie View Post
The 5th law of the universe is that cats will vomit at the most inconvenient time in the most disgusting place. It's proven fact. And the more irritating the cat otherwise, the worse the location of the vomit.
When I got my cat from her previous owners, they said, "She's like a Stepford cat! She hardly ever throws up, even!" My cat is a very sweet cat, but as she's gotten older, she's gotten less, er, "Stepfordian" in that respect. The oriental rug is her favorite place to lie in the sun and, sadly, to vomit up hairballs, as well.
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Old 03-08-2013, 12:47 PM   #15
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Love it!!! I think you should write a book about your JUDDD journey.
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Old 03-08-2013, 01:27 PM   #16
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Love it!!! I think you should write a book about your JUDDD journey.
Oh yes, please!!! Great idea 'Nilla!
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Old 03-09-2013, 04:41 AM   #17
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I also thank you for your updates...I've read them all and they are so encouraging...so many people here have had and are having great success..and that really helps someone like me...makes me know that if I keep to it, it is going to work..Keep the updates coming, please...hope your leg heals very soon.
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Old 03-09-2013, 05:08 AM   #18
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Love it!!! I think you should write a book about your JUDDD journey.
What a great idea
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Old 03-09-2013, 06:31 AM   #19
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When I realized the time had come to drop my DD and UD calories, it took me about a month of reshaping my eating and forgetting and making a few changes and adjusting and thinking about it. Then, one DD, it just happened.

I think that month served many purposes: maybe my body actually needed time to regroup and settle and maintain for awhile...maybe my mind needed time to truly believe and understand and accept. Whatever, JUDDD calm to the rescue, I didn't stress and I did make the adjustments I needed to continue losing.

You will too.
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I did not "lose" weight. I evicted it. It is gone and it ain't coming back!

JUDDD cares about calories. JUDDD does not care what you eat. Your body probably does.
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Old 03-09-2013, 07:14 AM   #20
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By letting go of the perfectionism that says "I'll just start again Monday when I can do this diet right" I have found a way to succeed. And that path to success is apparently, "Start again right now and keep doing it, ......"

Steph, I can SOOOO relate to this! Thank you for your lovely post. It's just full of NSVs!
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Old 03-11-2013, 01:19 PM   #21
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Steph,

I love your weekly updates and they always get me thinking! I totally understand about your social engagements...sure does make life hard sometimes. I have family members that refuse to accept that I don't want to eat. It really burns me up when they try to force food on me. I have stopped really caring whether I am "rude" or not. My health is more important to me. I think it is rude for someone to comment on other people's food. (Including horrified looks towards me and my green smoothies!)

I made great headway with this when I was pregnant and had Gestational Diabetes. I absolutely refused to eat anything with more than a moderate amount of carbs and everyone got over it!! I have told people that I am pre-diabetic before to avoid carbs (did low-carb for years before I found JUDDD). Both of my parents have DM so I don't consider this a lie!

Most people are actually a lot more understanding than I would have believed. I even have a client that brings a veggie tray every year around Christmas instead of the usual sweets. Even my carb-addict employees enjoy a break from the sweet stuff when this arrives.

I guess my point is: good for us, we are learning control over our bodies. Whatever motivates others to comment are their issues. And, truthfully, most of the time, people don't even notice if I don't eat.

This is such a wonderful, supportive group and I am so happy to be a part of it! Thank you all for your wonderful posts!
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Old 03-11-2013, 01:29 PM   #22
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Steph This is such a great post! I really needed to read it today! thanks!
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Old 03-14-2013, 05:25 PM   #23
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Love it!!! I think you should write a book about your JUDDD journey.
I think I have to lose a lot more weight before I can do that
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Old 03-14-2013, 05:27 PM   #24
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Thank you all so much for your encouragement. You all helped get me through the week!!
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Old 03-15-2013, 06:18 AM   #25
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Missed this one, Steph. As always you share your thoughts and feelings so cogently.

Quote:
We are weaving a coat of many colors here in this JUDD thread. We all have our own unique situations, and we help each other through them. Each strand makes our coat stronger and more beautiful.
This is one of the most quotable quotes I have read here! Thanks Kimmie.

Quote:
The 5th law of the universe is that cats will vomit at the most inconvenient time in the most disgusting place. It's proven fact. And the more irritating the cat otherwise, the worse the location of the vomit.
And the less a person like cats, the more likely they are to step in it!
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Old 03-15-2013, 11:21 AM   #26
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Originally Posted by stephdray View Post
I think I have to lose a lot more weight before I can do that
Well ... okay.
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