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Old 12-10-2012, 07:35 AM   #1
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Why do we overeat?

I thought I would start a thread about this topic. I don't know the answer but would love to hear what you think.

For me it started as a child. my parents over fed me and it seemed like I was always hungry even though I had enough food. My mother would try to always put me on a diet and make me feel like I was overweight. Then I really became overweight... Today I am capable of having a career and a good life. However I can't figure out why I overeat. I eat when I am happy, stressed, celebrating, bored, love cooking shows and learning about food. I love the way it tastes in my mouth. I went to the Overeaters anonymous site and I definetly answered yes to some of these questions.

1.Do I eat when I’m not hungry, or not eat when my body needs nourishment?
2.Do I go on eating binges for no apparent reason, sometimes eating until I’m stuffed or even feel sick?
3.Do I have feelings of guilt, shame or embarrassment about my weight or the way I eat?
4.Do I eat sensibly in front of others and then make up for it when I am alone?
5.Is my eating affecting my health or the way I live my life?
6.When my emotions are intense—whether positive or negative—do I find myself reaching for food?
7.Do my eating behaviors make me or others unhappy?
8.Have I ever used laxatives, vomiting, diuretics, excessive exercise, diet pills, shots or other medical interventions (including surgery) to try to control my weight?
9.Do I fast or severely restrict my food intake to control my weight?
10.Do I fantasize about how much better life would be if I were a different size or weight?
11.Do I need to chew or have something in my mouth all the time: food, gum, mints, candies or beverages?
12.Have I ever eaten food that is burned, frozen or spoiled; from containers in the grocery store; or out of the garbage?
13.Are there certain foods I can’t stop eating after having the first bite?
14.Have I lost weight with a diet or “period of control” only to be followed by bouts of uncontrolled eating and/or weight gain?
15.Do I spend too much time thinking about food, arguing with myself about whether or what to eat, planning the next diet or exercise cure, or counting calories


So am I an addict? I mean 30 % of americans are overweight... Are we all addicted to food? Is it the chemicals in our food that is making us want more, is it the abundance of it all, childhood trauma etc ??? I would love to hear
people's oppinions on this topic. Why are there skinny people in this world? How come they are not addicted?

Why do you think we overeat?
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Old 12-10-2012, 08:15 AM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cuttie99 View Post
I thought I would start a thread about this topic. I don't know the answer but would love to hear what you think.

For me it started as a child. my parents over fed me and it seemed like I was always hungry even though I had enough food. My mother would try to always put me on a diet and make me feel like I was overweight. Then I really became overweight... Today I am capable of having a career and a good life. However I can't figure out why I overeat. I eat when I am happy, stressed, celebrating, bored, love cooking shows and learning about food. I love the way it tastes in my mouth. I went to the Overeaters anonymous site and I definetly answered yes to some of these questions.

1.Do I eat when I’m not hungry, or not eat when my body needs nourishment?
2.Do I go on eating binges for no apparent reason, sometimes eating until I’m stuffed or even feel sick?
3.Do I have feelings of guilt, shame or embarrassment about my weight or the way I eat?
4.Do I eat sensibly in front of others and then make up for it when I am alone?
5.Is my eating affecting my health or the way I live my life?
6.When my emotions are intense—whether positive or negative—do I find myself reaching for food?
7.Do my eating behaviors make me or others unhappy?
8.Have I ever used laxatives, vomiting, diuretics, excessive exercise, diet pills, shots or other medical interventions (including surgery) to try to control my weight?
9.Do I fast or severely restrict my food intake to control my weight?
10.Do I fantasize about how much better life would be if I were a different size or weight?
11.Do I need to chew or have something in my mouth all the time: food, gum, mints, candies or beverages?
12.Have I ever eaten food that is burned, frozen or spoiled; from containers in the grocery store; or out of the garbage?
13.Are there certain foods I can’t stop eating after having the first bite?
14.Have I lost weight with a diet or “period of control” only to be followed by bouts of uncontrolled eating and/or weight gain?
15.Do I spend too much time thinking about food, arguing with myself about whether or what to eat, planning the next diet or exercise cure, or counting calories


So am I an addict? I mean 30 % of americans are overweight... Are we all addicted to food? Is it the chemicals in our food that is making us want more, is it the abundance of it all, childhood trauma etc ??? I would love to hear
people's oppinions on this topic. Why are there skinny people in this world? How come they are not addicted?

Why do you think we overeat?
I think a HUGE part of the problem is how our food is processed today. Every stinking thing has corn in it, which feed lots use to fatten up animals before slaughter. So what's it doing to us I also think that overly processed food ie. junk food, have wiggled it's way into our households via snazzy advertising campaigns, making us believe that name brand garbage are American food staples. How many of us used to throw high sugar, high carb, high calorie brand name things into our carts without even thinking about it? We're so used to eating this kind of stuff that we don't connect it to it's nutritional value. It was shocking to me when I actually started reading labels-the sugar alone in things is enough to make your jaw hit the floor!

Along with that I think comes a hefty dose of laziness. We're in an age where convenience is everything and if it's not pre-made, able to be nuked or consumed immediately, then we don't look at it. It takes a bit of planning and prep work to eat healthy. I bet if we compared how much time our great-grandmas spent in the kitchen everyday, versus how much time we spend in the kitchen everyday, we'd be in for a shock.

And I do think hormones play a part, as Gary Taubes has talked about in his book, Why We Get Fat. There are some people, like my sil, who can't gain weight for anything and even has to take meds to help her not lose (she's like a size 0 and is almost 6ft tall). I on the other hand can just look at a donut and gain 5lbs

Last edited by mom23kids; 12-10-2012 at 08:17 AM..
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Old 12-10-2012, 09:02 AM   #3
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I have pondered this question many, many times over the years. Why would I go out of control and eat huge portions, even if I wasn't completely enjoying the food? Why would I still want something more after eating a full meal?

I still don't know the answers to these questions, but for the time being, I seem to have overpowered these urges in myself. I've been very disciplined in my eating for almost a year. It was late January when I started low carbing last year, and only had a couple of celebration eating days until I started JUDDD in September. So far, I haven't blown a DD, and only had UUADs (planned) at Thanksgiving. I've speculated that it's because I want to lose more than I want the food. This time. Hasn't been the case for me about 8 trys out of 10 in the last few years. Why is it different this time? I want it so bad this time. Why? I have no idea.

A friend and I, years ago, wondered if it was the taste we were after, could we taste food and spit it out and be satisfied? We never really attempted it, but I don't think it's as simple as just wanting the taste. It's the whole experience, taste, texture, mouth feel, the satisfying feeling of swallowing, etc.

There's a lot of chemical stuff going on, that I don't understand, but I am only now learning to listen to and trust my body. Not just stuff it at the first feeling of hunger or tummy growl. I'm going to look forward to hearing what everyone thinks about this question.
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Old 12-10-2012, 09:07 AM   #4
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Somewhere I read about tasters and non tasters. Has to do with the number of taste buds and the type. Can't really remember it all but you test with color and I turned out to be a non taster which means I want to eat more since I am not getting the taste of the food sent to my brain. I believed that since I do not have a fabulous sense of taste or smell. So that is my excuse er reason.
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Old 12-10-2012, 09:24 AM   #5
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Comfort & Habit for me.

Plus eating high-calorie sugar /fat foods releases dopamine (pleasure, happy feeling, relaxed) . You get really hooked to that feeling after a long day at work, something stressful or even in times of happiness!! It feels good to eat high-calorie foods ,so you want more and more!!!
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Old 12-10-2012, 11:39 AM   #6
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Originally Posted by adillenal View Post
Somewhere I read about tasters and non tasters. Has to do with the number of taste buds and the type. Can't really remember it all but you test with color and I turned out to be a non taster which means I want to eat more since I am not getting the taste of the food sent to my brain. I believed that since I do not have a fabulous sense of taste or smell. So that is my excuse er reason.
That's funny because I took that test and turned out to be a super taster. I taste bitter to an extreme. I think it also makes a huge difference in how I eat. There are SO many veggies and some fruits that I just cannot tolerate. It is most evident in green veggies and of course those are the best for you.
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Old 12-10-2012, 11:53 AM   #7
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I have been told that I was overweight at 6 months and was put on a 'diet' by the doctor....as an adult, I can look back and speculate that probably had something to do with whatever was in the formula that I was being fed, but the doctor's solution was just to allow me less of it instead of considering why it was having this effect.

Last edited by Avicenna; 12-10-2012 at 11:56 AM..
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Old 12-10-2012, 11:59 AM   #8
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That's funny because I took that test and turned out to be a super taster. I taste bitter to an extreme. I think it also makes a huge difference in how I eat. There are SO many veggies and some fruits that I just cannot tolerate. It is most evident in green veggies and of course those are the best for you.
Well, you fit the description to a T. I have heard people talk about veggies are bitter and I have never tasted that so there must be something to it. As a nontaster I keep eating to try to get the taste fulfillment apparently.
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Old 12-10-2012, 12:16 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by adillenal View Post
Somewhere I read about tasters and non tasters. Has to do with the number of taste buds and the type. Can't really remember it all but you test with color and I turned out to be a non taster which means I want to eat more since I am not getting the taste of the food sent to my brain. I believed that since I do not have a fabulous sense of taste or smell. So that is my excuse er reason.
I've heard of this too. I've never taken the test, but if I had to guess, I would be a non taster since no veggies taste bitter to me and I can eat pretty much anything under the sun and like it.
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Old 12-10-2012, 12:20 PM   #10
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Of course the answer to your question will have many answers, but I think one of the BIG things that has changed about eating is that we no longer think of eating as something we only do at mealtimes, and sitting down at a table! We are bombarded with food ads, especially fast food, that shows us foods that are named *SNACKERS*... perfect to grab for that little 'something' between meals, and TV ads for candy bars that tell us *You're not yourself when you're hungry!... grab a Snickers!*

People can't go to the movie theater without having to sit in the dark and stuff poor food and beverage choices into their mouths. We can't just spend an evening on the sofa with our honey but WITHOUT food.

We have to accompany almost every activity with FOOD! Instead of getting a glass of water when we're thirsty, half the world seems to always have a soda at hand.

We get *treats*... We line up at the Dairy Queen to get *treats* and we don't just get a baby-sized cone or cup... We get the Peanut Buster Parfait or the BLIZZARD. The big one!

We have come to think of eating as something we do multiple times a day, and to accompany a multitude of activities. As you stated above, we eat -not just for meals- but to fill time and space. We eat in response to emotion! You mentioned above about eating because we're happy or stressed or bored. We now eat so much in response to how we feel emotionally that a lot of us don't even know how to respond to life without food in our mouths.

I've read people state on LCF that they HATE to ever feel hungry. It's apparently like some physical pain to them. We have even been ADVISED to eat many times a day! Small meals, they say, but how often is it truly all that small? We make sure we have something to EAT in our purse with us when we think we might (Heaven Forbid) be late getting back. We might be caught without something to put in our stomachs, so we make sure to have cheese sticks or nuts or bars or little bags of 100-calorie SNACKS in our purse.

We eat all the time! We are used to it. It's the new way we eat these days.. all the time. We focus on what we'll eat next, rather than it ever occurring to us that we could spend some hours NOT EATING between meals.

I think folks that go back to eating three times, or two, a day, go a long way toward moderating their calorie intake just from that.

So I think we overeat a lot because of how OFTEN we eat. It's become our new way of thinking and our habitual way of eating. And it really packs on the pounds as the years go by.
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Last edited by SoHappy; 12-10-2012 at 12:22 PM..
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Old 12-10-2012, 12:22 PM   #11
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I feel like part of the reason I overheat is because my dad would punish/ground me and my siblings if we didn't eat everything on our plates. He said as a kid, he would go days and days without any food, so we "should be grateful we have food and eat it all"

I have 4 siblings and me and one of my brothers are the only ones that ever struggled with weight. My other 3 siblings are super skinny and eat candy, cookies, junk food, fast food, etc... All the time and never gain any weight. I wonder about the science behind that...
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Old 12-10-2012, 12:32 PM   #12
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I agree with Pat. Us Baptists think we can't get more than two together without having food. Christmas PArty - Who is going to bring what to eat. I get tired of every event revolving around food. I asked that once to my Sunday School class and I got some terrifed looks. Like I was being subversive. Can't we do ANYTHING without having FOOD. A gift exchange does not require food. Oh yes it does with that group.
OK Rant over.
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Old 12-10-2012, 12:46 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by adillenal View Post
I agree with Pat. Us Baptists think we can't get more than two together without having food. Christmas PArty - Who is going to bring what to eat. I get tired of every event revolving around food. I asked that once to my Sunday School class and I got some terrifed looks. Like I was being subversive. Can't we do ANYTHING without having FOOD. A gift exchange does not require food. Oh yes it does with that group.
OK Rant over.
Adi, I think I used to go to this church.
I can just picture you asking this and their "terrified looks" made me LOL!

Pat, The best thing that JUDDD has done for me is cured me of mindless snacking. It has helped me to establish when I truly hunger or am I simply bored or stressed? Very eye opening that most of the time, I am not truly hungry? I eat once or twice per day and am completely satisfied. This is such a wonderful healing revelation.
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Old 12-10-2012, 01:17 PM   #14
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Originally Posted by SoHappy View Post
Of course the answer to your question will have many answers, but I think one of the BIG things that has changed about eating is that we no longer think of eating as something we only do at mealtimes, and sitting down at a table! We are bombarded with food ads, especially fast food, that shows us foods that are named *SNACKERS*... perfect to grab for that little 'something' between meals, and TV ads for candy bars that tell us *You're not yourself when you're hungry!... grab a Snickers!*

People can't go to the movie theater without having to sit in the dark and stuff poor food and beverage choices into their mouths. We can't just spend an evening on the sofa with our honey but WITHOUT food.

We have to accompany almost every activity with FOOD! Instead of getting a glass of water when we're thirsty, half the world seems to always have a soda at hand.

We get *treats*... We line up at the Dairy Queen to get *treats* and we don't just get a baby-sized cone or cup... We get the Peanut Buster Parfait or the BLIZZARD. The big one!

We have come to think of eating as something we do multiple times a day, and to accompany a multitude of activities. As you stated above, we eat -not just for meals- but to fill time and space. We eat in response to emotion! You mentioned above about eating because we're happy or stressed or bored. We now eat so much in response to how we feel emotionally that a lot of us don't even know how to respond to life without food in our mouths.

I've read people state on LCF that they HATE to ever feel hungry. It's apparently like some physical pain to them. We have even been ADVISED to eat many times a day! Small meals, they say, but how often is it truly all that small? We make sure we have something to EAT in our purse with us when we think we might (Heaven Forbid) be late getting back. We might be caught without something to put in our stomachs, so we make sure to have cheese sticks or nuts or bars or little bags of 100-calorie SNACKS in our purse.

We eat all the time! We are used to it. It's the new way we eat these days.. all the time. We focus on what we'll eat next, rather than it ever occurring to us that we could spend some hours NOT EATING between meals.

I think folks that go back to eating three times, or two, a day, go a long way toward moderating their calorie intake just from that.

So I think we overeat a lot because of how OFTEN we eat. It's become our new way of thinking and our habitual way of eating. And it really packs on the pounds as the years go by.
Pat, I was laughing histerically reading your post!!

You are absolutley right.. how dare us go out without a snack in our purse or feel HUNGRY! I guess we need to come to terms that feeling hungry is acceptable! I like that... Next time I am feeling hungry I am going to ask my self.. Did I recently eat? if the answer is yes.. then I should just shut up and wait until my next meal. If the answer is no then I should assess the situation and move forward from that.

It's amazing the tricks our mind plays on us. Shouldn't it know whats best for us. It stops me at a red light, keeps me from pointing metal things in electrical sockets but gosh darn it it convinces me to overeat so I will be fat and unhealthy!!!

I went on a vacation recently, pedometer and workout clothes all ready to go. I promised I would behave on the trip, I did well the first day and then forgot all about my agreement to myself and ate like the world is going to end and that I am "entitled" to eat because I am on vacation and I may not be able to eat some of the exotic or even american foods back home!! Just plain crazy.

I am actually hungry now and I am going to stay hungry until my dinner time! Hopefully I last and my mind does not convince me other wise!
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Old 12-10-2012, 01:35 PM   #15
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One more thing that I have noticed, since beginning JUDDD. The calm that I feel even when I do hunger has taken place of the, "I am starving to death" emergency feeling. I like that peaceful feeling and it has even given me a bit of a strength, that I never knew I had. Maybe the same thing is happening during the tater hack? Everyone learns that one cold tater can calm that beast called hunger.
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Old 12-10-2012, 02:27 PM   #16
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I think people are getting fat because food is now so easy to get, to prepare, just stop at any place - gas station, drug store, Wally World and they have all kinds of food, ready to eat, or just micro a bit! Lots of food in the frozen section I have never tried or even know what it is

My mom would make all our meals from scratch - peel all the pototoes, put the meat in the oven ( not much meat either - Dad got a bigger portion as he worked hard all day). Mom would wash clothes much different then I do - I just push a button, but she had a wringer washer when I was small, had to bent over, reach and wring it in that thing on the washer, sometimes had to heat the water up too, then take it all out side and hang it up, again bending down many times to hang it all up, it was work! Then taking it all in the house, ironing was another big job! No wonder women years back had such a tiny waist!!

Because we have all the modern conveniences, we do not have to "move" like my parents did. Today DH had to clear the drive-way ( has a machine that does that) Dad did it all by hand with a shovel!

I think we over-eat because "we can". McD's has cheap food and why not?

We spend the money for food because we can, our parents did not have this kind of money, money was tight and they were thin!


With all the great things we have to eat and not do much to get this food we put on the pounds! We just do not move!

Think I went a bit off topic - sorry about that!

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Old 12-10-2012, 02:52 PM   #17
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Originally Posted by adillenal View Post
I agree with Pat. Us Baptists think we can't get more than two together without having food. Christmas PArty - Who is going to bring what to eat. I get tired of every event revolving around food. I asked that once to my Sunday School class and I got some terrifed looks. Like I was being subversive. Can't we do ANYTHING without having FOOD. A gift exchange does not require food. Oh yes it does with that group.
OK Rant over.
And I like food as well as anybody else.. I LOVE food! All kinds of food. I love planning for it and shopping for it, cooking it and smelling it and eating it. It's just that I don't have to be EATING it many times a day every single day, and I know folks who eat exactly that way. I knew a woman who had *stuff to snack on* at her desk at work years ago, and SHE ATE ALL DAY LONG!

I love the food that is a part of Holidays and Celebrations, etc. etc. etc., but I know too many who just snack almost nonstop every single day. I just think there is a big difference between the delight in wonderful meals, and the habit of eating all the time.
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Old 12-10-2012, 03:00 PM   #18
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Pat, The best thing that JUDDD has done for me is cured me of mindless snacking. It has helped me to establish when I truly hunger or am I simply bored or stressed? Very eye opening that most of the time, I am not truly hungry? I eat once or twice per day and am completely satisfied. This is such a wonderful healing revelation.
I loved that about JUDDD too. That's a good term: Mindless Snacking! When you really think about it, in the long run.. it's deadly.

I had eaten at lowered calories before, so was sort of over that, but JUDDD helped it become a smart habit. If I sit down for a tea break in the late afternoon, it's a planned small meal, as I usually don't eat breakfast.
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Old 12-10-2012, 03:07 PM   #19
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And I like food as well as anybody else.. I LOVE food! All kinds of food. I love planning for it and shopping for it, cooking it and smelling it and eating it. It's just that I don't have to be EATING it many times a day every single day, and I know folks who eat exactly that way. I knew a woman who had *stuff to snack on* at her desk at work years ago, and SHE ATE ALL DAY LONG!

I love the food that is a part of Holidays and Celebrations, etc. etc. etc., but I know too many who just snack almost nonstop every single day. I just think there is a big difference between the delight in wonderful meals, and the habit of eating all the time.

This is how I feel about it as well. I used to be one of those nonstop eating and snacking people who had to have loads of "emergency food" in my giant purse everywhere I went. This didn't change when I was eating long term very low carb either, so it wasn't some sort of carb craving, etc. No wonder I gained weight and had digestive issues. My GI system was working nonstop and I kept pushing more food down there nonstop. Eating constantly was the norm, and it was a hard habit to break, but I'm so glad I was able to stop it with JUDDD. Overeating for those few holidays or celebrations during the year were never what made me fat, it was all that nonstop eating constantly every day that did it.
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Old 12-10-2012, 03:40 PM   #20
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I now see my post above here somewhere was really about how and why so many are fat!

I think the reason we overeat is because we can!! Food everywhere! Easy to prepare, and it is available!!

I grew up in a college town, no fast food 50 years ago! We did have one pizza place in town and places to eat at noon where the dine stores ( we had 2 ). It was good food, but expensive.

I think we all eat too much because we can, we just can!!! We no longer spend half the day making our meals! No longer bake much from scratch. I now make most cookies from a mix or buy them. Mom made all ours and it was work. If we had to work to make the meals like in the olden days we would not eat so much.

We over eat because we can! Because it is just there!
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Old 12-10-2012, 03:40 PM   #21
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This is how I feel about it as well. I used to be one of those nonstop eating and snacking people who had to have loads of "emergency food" in my giant purse everywhere I went. This didn't change when I was eating long term very low carb either, so it wasn't some sort of carb craving, etc. No wonder I gained weight and had digestive issues. My GI system was working nonstop and I kept pushing more food down there nonstop. Eating constantly was the norm, and it was a hard habit to break, but I'm so glad I was able to stop it with JUDDD. Overeating for those few holidays or celebrations during the year were never what made me fat, it was all that nonstop eating constantly every day that did it.
I liked these two observations to much I had to read them twice!
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Old 12-10-2012, 04:12 PM   #22
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But what about us crazies...
I was a normal child until about puberty when I was larger than all my friends and I can't say I ate anymore than anyone else but, certainly noticed that some of my friends ate a ton and stayed slim and I was a bit chubby ever since.

The other thing is I can vividly remember dreaming about food even as a child, I would daydream about it and fantasize what tasty thing I could eat next etc. The thing is my mom definitely had her issues but she never mentioned a thing about my weight.

In high school I did plenty of activities and sports and walked a couple of miles a day to and from and that probably kept me slimmer but I was never skinny, and I skipped a lot of lunches just because my parents really didn't do things like make lunch for us anymore after the age of 12 and certainly didn't hand me lunch money. So If I didn't grab an apple off the counter there was no lunch in high school.

it was in college that i got really obese, with a very addictive type relationship with processed food, soda and most likely a depression. I managed to get to just mildly overweight after the fact with a very strict eating regimen and exercise but I never got to my goal weight before my kids and right now I am struggling to find a route back to a normal relationship with food.

I personally think that the snacking thing is a big component, but I know that the explanation for my brain and food just isn't an easy explanation. The stuff in my brain as a kid or in college regarding food just wasn't normal and the thoughts I have about it now are better but still not normal.

Last edited by Rainypep; 12-10-2012 at 04:14 PM.. Reason: word error
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Old 12-10-2012, 04:22 PM   #23
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Rainypep, I gained weight my fir$t year in college. I think for me the extra wa$ from not eating nutritional, but everything that all of my friend$ ate, like Taco Bell, Whataburger, & Pizza Hut. Coca-cola & Dr. Pepper didn't help!

And about our friend$ who can eat anything that they want and look fit!!?!?
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Old 12-10-2012, 04:31 PM   #24
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Well, you fit the description to a T. I have heard people talk about veggies are bitter and I have never tasted that so there must be something to it. As a nontaster I keep eating to try to get the taste fulfillment apparently.
So, basically, you're screwed either way.
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Old 12-10-2012, 04:39 PM   #25
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I was never overweight as a child or an adult, until mid 30s. I don't remember thinking that much about food as a child, really. Now, I thought I could be skinnier when I was in my 20's and I would frequently do the low-fat thing, but I never went over 130ish. I wanted to be 110-115, lol. In my mid 30s something happened to my metabolism and I started gaining, and gaining, and gaining. I felt helpless and hopeless. I went to WW at about 169 lbs, which was my highest at that time and was able to get down to about 145, but gained it all back plus 60 more, lol. I hope JUDDD can save me.

OOps, I didn't really contribute to the topic, lol. One thing that made me overweight, in addition to a slower metabolism, was eating out huge meals with my then boyfriend who was able to take me to expensive restaurants and buy expensive wine, and loved to eat late meals like after 9 pm. Also, I am one who kept snacks at work and would eat pretty much all day, including lunch and supper. Snacks didn't count, lol. It wasn't something mysterious that made me fat, no matter how much I've tried to fool myself.
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Old 12-10-2012, 05:59 PM   #26
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rainypep View Post
But what about us crazies...
I was a normal child until about puberty when I was larger than all my friends and I can't say I ate anymore than anyone else but, certainly noticed that some of my friends ate a ton and stayed slim and I was a bit chubby ever since.

The other thing is I can vividly remember dreaming about food even as a child, I would daydream about it and fantasize what tasty thing I could eat next etc. The thing is my mom definitely had her issues but she never mentioned a thing about my weight.

In high school I did plenty of activities and sports and walked a couple of miles a day to and from and that probably kept me slimmer but I was never skinny, and I skipped a lot of lunches just because my parents really didn't do things like make lunch for us anymore after the age of 12 and certainly didn't hand me lunch money. So If I didn't grab an apple off the counter there was no lunch in high school.

it was in college that i got really obese, with a very addictive type relationship with processed food, soda and most likely a depression. I managed to get to just mildly overweight after the fact with a very strict eating regimen and exercise but I never got to my goal weight before my kids and right now I am struggling to find a route back to a normal relationship with food.

I personally think that the snacking thing is a big component, but I know that the explanation for my brain and food just isn't an easy explanation. The stuff in my brain as a kid or in college regarding food just wasn't normal and the thoughts I have about it now are better but still not normal.
Ahhhh, I love when us food crazies come out of the closet! And we're not crazy, doll--trust me, I'm a mental health therapist, I know from crazy. And while every single poster here makes good, true and valid points about the decline in quality and ever-more availability of food, I think what you and the originator of this thread are really asking is about emotional eating. And whether it's that can of beer, online porn, or chocolate chip cookie we reach for to soothe our inner beast, I think it's all part of the same human phenomenon: alot of us are looking for a way to feel better. Better from what is as unique as every person is. And whether the chicken or egg came first as far as body size as the thing we're trying to feel better about, who knows? I ate the same exact diet and had the same level of activity as my brother and sister, but they were thin and I was chubby. And kids are mean to fat kids, so I automatically had something I wanted to feel better from. What made me feel better? Cookies! And a vicious cycle is born.

I know that's vastly oversimplifying, and the genetic and physical variations, hormones, etc. that determine fat storage vs. fat usage are incredibly complicated, and there's just a lot that's out of our control. But I also know damn well I learned from my mom that food is love, and I've spent oh so many years trying to supersede that programming. I love food. Food loves me--so well it wants to stay on my hips and never leave! I did a bunch of personal work in my 20s and made complete peace with my body being however and whatever it is, and decided to love myself in whatever form I'm in, unconditionally. And that made me a very much happier person...who loves food, enjoys it, refuses to judge or demonize it except on the basis of quality and health of how my body responds to it.

And yet...it's still a struggle not to eat 500 chocolate chip cookies when I'm under stress. Or to reach for any mind-altering substance or self-harmful behavior. And the days I eat enough See's candy to become a minority stock-holder in the company, I see it for what it is--an attempt to alter my brain chemistry and how I feel. I don't vilify myself or the food, I just know that I'm human, and I'll do better at my self-care presently....
--patty
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Old 12-10-2012, 06:17 PM   #27
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Patty! And very humbling.
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Old 12-10-2012, 06:38 PM   #28
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I was 100 pounds and 5'6"when I graduated from high school at 16. Talk about skinny. I gained 20 pounds my freshman year in college because, by golly, my mother paid for that meal ticket and I ate three meals a day. I grew another inch in my early 20's to 5'7" and I remained at 120 until I was over thirty and gradually gained up to 130 which was still thin. Enter 40 and I had my only child. Gained 60 pounds with him and have never lost it. All my life I ate whatever I wanted and remained pretty much the same on the scale. If I had not had DS, I might still be 130 but I wouldn't trade him for the lower weight. I keep a pre DS picture on my frig so I can remind him what his dear old mother sacrificed to have him. He just laughs. And he is just as lean as I was at his age and eats everything that isn't nailed down.
So I had a healthy relationship with food for 40 years and have struggled with my weight for the past 23 post DS years. I lost 25 pounds on low carb low fat but as soon as I tried LC with high fat the calories were just too much and bouncing around combined with foot surgery, crutches for months and depending on DH for food, I ended up back up to 180 where I leveled off and never went above.
BUT with JUDDD, I can eat goodies and still lose and not feel deprived. I LOVE JUDDD.

And I agree about the processed food. DH has lost 30 pounds this past year without trying since we raised and butchered our own beef, pork, chicken and have our own laying hens. We also raised some veggies this summer and have big tubs of spaghetti squash sitting around to consume during the winter. We had a bumper crop. His coaching clothes are falling off of him although he still has some more to lose. So he is living testimony to healthy homegrown food making a difference. And I have noticed he naturally eats smaller portions of the homegrown foods. I have also noticed he eats his dinner and then goes and does something else. When we had processed foods a lot, he would be prowling around the kitchen and in the frig an hour after dinner looking for something to eat. Now if he wants something else he will eat a pickle spear and be on his way.

Didn't mean to get carried away but think there are many reasons different people overeat. Stress, emotions, boredom and so forth. When I am really busy, I never think about food. I forget to eat and just keep on keeping on. So I think now in my life, I eat out of boredom. Got to fix that and keep busy.

And trying to stick to LC, I always had food in my purse in case I could not find anything to eat when I was out and about. Will never forget having to throw away a very expensive leather purse because I forgot I had a HB egg with me just in case. EWWW!!! Could not get that smell out so it had to go.
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Old 12-11-2012, 05:56 AM   #29
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[QUOTE=divinemsm54;16129136]Ahhhh, I love when us food crazies come out of the closet! And we're not crazy, doll--trust me, I'm a mental health therapist, I know from crazy. And while every single poster here makes good, true and valid points about the decline in quality and ever-more availability of food, I think what you and the originator of this thread are really asking is about emotional eating. And whether it's that can of beer, online porn, or chocolate chip cookie we reach for to soothe our inner beast, I think it's all part of the same human phenomenon: alot of us are looking for a way to feel better. Better from what is as unique as every person is. And whether the chicken or egg came first as far as body size as the thing we're trying to feel better about, who knows? I ate the same exact diet and had the same level of activity as my brother and sister, but they were thin and I was chubby. And kids are mean to fat kids, so I automatically had something I wanted to feel better from. What made me feel better? Cookies! And a vicious cycle is born.


Great post Patty! I definetly agree with the bolded areas especially! Sometimes our obsessions with food do make us think their is something wrong with us. I am defiently an emotional eater. I need to find a hobby!

Here's another point.... all of us dream of being skinny etc and are sometimes jealous of those that are. But you know what, that skinny person may not be happy at all and have other issues they are dealing with. Just yesterday I ran into a very skinny beautiful girl who never gains wt. however she is unhappy with life, she can't find a decent boyfriend, was abused by her mother as a child, she has very little money and was recently diagnosed with an eye condition. She has her own addicted personality with men and she makes poor choices in life. I make poor choices with food. That really made me stop and count my blessings...

I may be a "addicted or "love" I don't know with food but I have other things in my life to be greatful for. If food is my only big issue I would take that then being that beautiful girl with soo many problems.

This thread is really therapuetic to me! Thank you to all that have shared! everyone has great points!
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Old 12-11-2012, 06:48 AM   #30
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Yes..this thread is very theraputic to me also..so many good points to think about..and the fact that we are all so different, yet, alike, in many ways...Life has changed a lot since I raised my child...I didn't know that the fast food was so bad for us...I was guilty of getting take out often, at the end of a busy work day...now I am finding that for me, there may also be so allergies involved..so I have taken some things out of my diet, such as gluten..corn..peanut butter...and who knows how much difference that will make....but I know it can...so there are many things to look at,.that's why we all have to find what works for us....for the first time, really, in my life, I believe it is possible to deal with my weight problem..I am actually paying attention to what I eat..and also what is IN, what I eat...keep up the good work, everyone..you're doing great.
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