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Old 09-05-2012, 10:53 AM   #61
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So happy that I got to page 2 and saw you posted, twice!

You are a big inspiration Kim! I often joke that my fat is keeping my wrinkles (I'm almost 40) away... so what happens when you lose that fat?

Not sure, but finding a way through it, for each of us, is part of our journey. And whether it's st john's wort, or talking to a therapist, or exercise for firming, or surgery (for some), and self acceptance-- there's something you can do.

You are gorgeous, and funny, and I do hope you keep posting b/c you DO have something to offer!


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Old 09-05-2012, 11:05 AM   #62
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Thank you for sharing I love you being one of my buddds.
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Old 09-05-2012, 11:08 AM   #63
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Thanks for checking in on us!! At the risk of sounding like a broken record....you're a beautiful inspiration!
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Old 09-05-2012, 03:03 PM   #64
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Old 09-05-2012, 03:49 PM   #65
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Kimberly!!!!It was wonderful hearing from you today! Can't wait to see you here everyday very soon! Thrilled things are looking brighter for ya, my sweet budd! and big ole for you!!

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Old 09-06-2012, 06:17 AM   #66
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Hugs right back ya my dear Phyllis, i pray that you are feeling spunky soon too
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Old 09-06-2012, 11:26 AM   #67
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So glad to see you posting and the positive vibes

I remember when I thought losing weight would be the end to all my problems..... silly me. I just find new ones! LOL When I was 100 pounds heavier it was so so so so easy to blame everything on being overweight (morbidly obese, really) but now that I'm actually only considered a little "overweight" my psyche, that I guess must find something else to be a problem, is finding all sorts of other things to make me work on. Sometimes that makes me sad, as in "why can't I ever be satisfied?" but reading your post today made me realize it is just who I am, I guess. I am a problem solver. If I'd run out of work to do on myself I'd have nothing to do!

----- but I realize this is a journey and even when I was still 100 pounds higher I decided to just LIVE LIFE and BE HAPPY right where I was at, and it was in that frame of mind I found the way to lose the weight. I've come full circle, and so when I get frustrated, I just remember LIVE LIFE and BE HAPPY right where you are at, girl (telling myself this LOL)..... Don't wait until everything is perfect because I'll find something else that isn't perfect and then I'm waiting for something that isn't ever going to happen.

Don't mind her, she's just talking to herself. (said herself)
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Old 09-06-2012, 11:45 AM   #68
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Quote:
Originally Posted by C'Marie View Post
So glad to see you posting and the positive vibes

I remember when I thought losing weight would be the end to all my problems..... silly me. I just find new ones! LOL When I was 100 pounds heavier it was so so so so easy to blame everything on being overweight (morbidly obese, really) but now that I'm actually only considered a little "overweight" my psyche, that I guess must find something else to be a problem, is finding all sorts of other things to make me work on. Sometimes that makes me sad, as in "why can't I ever be satisfied?" but reading your post today made me realize it is just who I am, I guess. I am a problem solver. If I'd run out of work to do on myself I'd have nothing to do!

----- but I realize this is a journey and even when I was still 100 pounds higher I decided to just LIVE LIFE and BE HAPPY right where I was at, and it was in that frame of mind I found the way to lose the weight. I've come full circle, and so when I get frustrated, I just remember LIVE LIFE and BE HAPPY right where you are at, girl (telling myself this LOL)..... Don't wait until everything is perfect because I'll find something else that isn't perfect and then I'm waiting for something that isn't ever going to happen.

Don't mind her, she's just talking to herself. (said herself)
Great post!
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Old 09-06-2012, 12:32 PM   #69
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Old 09-06-2012, 12:41 PM   #70
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Quote:
Originally Posted by C'Marie View Post
So glad to see you posting and the positive vibes

I remember when I thought losing weight would be the end to all my problems..... silly me. I just find new ones! LOL When I was 100 pounds heavier it was so so so so easy to blame everything on being overweight (morbidly obese, really) but now that I'm actually only considered a little "overweight" my psyche, that I guess must find something else to be a problem, is finding all sorts of other things to make me work on. Sometimes that makes me sad, as in "why can't I ever be satisfied?" but reading your post today made me realize it is just who I am, I guess. I am a problem solver. If I'd run out of work to do on myself I'd have nothing to do!

----- but I realize this is a journey and even when I was still 100 pounds higher I decided to just LIVE LIFE and BE HAPPY right where I was at, and it was in that frame of mind I found the way to lose the weight. I've come full circle, and so when I get frustrated, I just remember LIVE LIFE and BE HAPPY right where you are at, girl (telling myself this LOL)..... Don't wait until everything is perfect because I'll find something else that isn't perfect and then I'm waiting for something that isn't ever going to happen.

Don't mind her, she's just talking to herself. (said herself)
Great post.. This is kind of where i am now.. (talking to my self that is ) lmao.. I have been most of my life the say way as you discribed.. always waitng .... to be happy.. Well .. No MORE ~ Thanks dear one for sharing your inner most self with me today
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Old 09-06-2012, 01:00 PM   #71
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You so deserve to be happy. You are a very special woman Kimberly
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Old 09-06-2012, 01:36 PM   #72
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Originally Posted by sterlinggirl View Post
Great post.. This is kind of where i am now.. (talking to my self that is ) lmao.. I have been most of my life the say way as you discribed.. always waitng .... to be happy.. Well .. No MORE ~ Thanks dear one for sharing your inner most self with me today
Kimberly: The only time I ever experienced being depressed was when I was in my late 30's. I had too many commitments, was a perfectionist and finally could not keep up. I had a melt down that lasted about 6 months. When I finally got through it (it was a very dark and unhappy feeling) I vowed to never, ever feel that unhappy again no matter what it takes.

Ever since then, with that vow to myself in mind, I have had this visual that pops up when I feel that, emotionally, I'm going in the wrong direction.

You see, I was raised in a very old crooked house that had a dark, scary basement. It had no windows at all. It had a dirt floor a big scary coal furnace and a black cat. The cat was not a pet. My mother kept it down there to eat the sewer rats.

Once my brother locked me in that basement. I was terrified. I thought I was going to die. I could not breathe.

Ever since I came out of that 6 month depression in my 30's, if something is causing me to feel bad I picture the door knob on the door that led to the steep, cracked wooden stairs going down into the darkness of that basement. I picture my hand reaching for the door knob and touching it.

What do I have to do to keep me from opening the door to darkness and fear and unhappiness? I asked myself immediately. Sometimes I even sit down with my journal and write down a list of things that will help. Or, I go back to a list I have written before.

Some of the things on my anti-darkness list: Call my BFF; Go to bed and pull the covers over my head for a while; Spend the day watching my favorite movies or funny movies; paint my toe nails; mop the kitchen floor (sounds stupid, but that and vacuuming cheer me up); take an entire day off from all work and commitments; stay in my pajamas; Go to the lake; Get on the elliptical cross trainer or go for a long walk; Take a long shower or a jacuzzi bath with lavender bath salts; read a novel and get lost in it; make a huge bowl of pasta with butter and eat it all (I know, not the best idea especially on a DD but I do use whole wheat pasta and sometimes add steamed brocolli!!!); look at pictures of my grand kids or call my grand kids. Hard to be depressed when I'm listening to their stories.

OK, you get the point. I don't care what it takes. I'm not going to be discouraged, depressed and unhappy.

So, I suggest you write two lists. The first one has to be every single thing that you love about yourself. Your smile, your sense of humor, your compassion for others, the shape of your big toe, whatever. Make it a long list of what you love about YOU, inside and out. (One of the things I love about me is that I love being organized!)

The second list should be of things that cheer you up. It should be a list you can go to when those negative, lying voices in your head are keeping you from feeling wonderful. (One thing on my list is telling my DH it's time for us to take a nap and he knows that the "napping" will not include sleeping.)

Whatever your favorite things are, write those down and do them.

I'm always cheered up by lots of sun light. I'm always cheered up when there is no clutter anywhere. So, opening all the blinds and windows and de-cluttering makes me happy. (My DH loves clutter, I pick up all his clutter as soon as he leaves the house and sometimes I put it back right before he comes home to keep him happy for a while. )

OK, I just realized I'm talking to myself! So, I fit right in here, right?

One of my friends said she has a lot of loose skin. She is absolutely beautiful and I've never seen it. She told me she shows off what she can show off, covers up the rest and enjoys her assets (like a gorgeous face and hair and lovely figure. I don't know where she hides all the loose skin but she told me she never wears sleeveless tops because she hates the tops of her arms. )
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Old 09-06-2012, 01:44 PM   #73
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Great post Yam-Yam! I loved reading that
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Old 09-06-2012, 02:32 PM   #74
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C'Marie and Yam Yam....what wonderful words written today and so uplifting.

Once again...realizing what a blessing this forum can be to me. Thank you precious budds!

I know it has been said before.....but worth saying again..............

WE ARE ALL SO LUCKY TO HAVE ONE ANOTHER......and there's always room for more!!!!!!!!!
for every sweet budd today! Phyl
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Old 09-06-2012, 03:11 PM   #75
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sterlingirl, New but hope you come back so I can get to know you. Best wishes.

Everybody else, your love and support to your cyberbuddies are really inspirational to me.
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Old 09-06-2012, 03:36 PM   #76
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Glad you are here, Cici!
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Old 09-06-2012, 03:46 PM   #77
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Just realized there is one more important list I made. Can you tell I'm a list maker?

That list had 2 columns.

Column number one: Things that bug me that I have control over and I can change.

Column number two: Things that bug me that I have no control over and I cannot change.

It bugs me when the roots on my hair start to turn a salt and pepperish gray. Thankfully Loreal Feria has a perfect color that matches my natural turtle shell cool medium brunette hair color with golden high lights. For $6 or $7 bucks, I can slap that goo on my hair roots and feel happier and like a new person. It's something I can change.

It has always bugged me that I have really big feet. They are a size 11 narrow and it's hard to find cute shoes that don't cost a ton of money. Can I change my big feet to smaller feet? Nope. Gotta learn to live with them. Gotta be thankful that as tall as I am I won't blow over in a storm, thanks to my big feet. Gotta be thankful that I have feet. Some people don't. Gotta be thankful they work so well and have served me faithfully for 58 years (except when I broke one playing badmitten when I was 14 yrs. old. )

See what I'm saying? It's that old phrase "God give me the courage to change the things I can change, accept the things I cannot change and please give me the wisdom to know the difference."

Love all my JUDD BUDDs for sure! Thanks for letting me gab away. Feel free to toggle past my verbose ramblings. I think I have too much time on my hands today. Can you tell it's a DD? I'm trying to stay out of the kitchen!!!
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Old 09-06-2012, 06:41 PM   #78
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Yam-Yam!
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Old 09-07-2012, 08:41 AM   #79
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It's that old phrase "God give me the courage to change the things I can change, accept the things I cannot change and please give me the wisdom to know the difference."
YAMYAM..


I have forgotten this.. I love you for sharing your self with me and the rest of this board.. Some times (tears) Need to flow with others and for others to help heal our self.. This has been one of best things to happen in my life.. being part of the JUDDD group.. I haave learned to much and have felt so at home with you all.. Free theraphy.. wow,, Thanks agin girls~
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Old 09-07-2012, 09:08 AM   #80
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Yep^^^
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Old 09-07-2012, 10:02 AM   #81
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Just chiming in with everyone else to say we are so glad to have you back among the JUDDD BUDDS!!
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Old 09-08-2012, 12:44 AM   #82
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sterlinggirl View Post
It's that old phrase "God give me the courage to change the things I can change, accept the things I cannot change and please give me the wisdom to know the difference."
YAMYAM..


I have forgotten this.. I love you for sharing your self with me and the rest of this board.. Some times (tears) Need to flow with others and for others to help heal our self.. This has been one of best things to happen in my life.. being part of the JUDDD group.. I haave learned to much and have felt so at home with you all.. Free theraphy.. wow,, Thanks agin girls~
Hugs for Kimberly and YamYam and all of the rest of the JUDDD BUDDDs for sharing their thoughts with us.
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Old 09-08-2012, 03:06 AM   #83
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Kimberly, when you make that list of positive things, be sure to include that you have the unusual and delightful ability to combine being shy with being out there expressing yourself freely and completely and with great kindness...and people, all of us for sure, love you for it.

BTW in your avi - that is your goal sweater isn't it? Worn to a picnic for everyone to see! Bravo!
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Old 09-09-2012, 06:50 AM   #84
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Kimberly - I started i think the same day as you back in March - look at you and how amazing you look and what you have accomplished. I did not succeed as you did. But I am here now and today I am starting back on JUDDD and feeling better than I have in months.

I too have had the dark cloud over me, with work, etc, it all was too much to think about my health. But I was drawn back here and read what you have been going through and you have inspired me so much. I hope that you see what a wonderful person you are and how much you help others. You helped me!

Just think I could be where you are now if I had stuck with it, but I am not going to get myself down about that I am going to get there also. Just that today is the day I start my tranformation, I guess March was not the timing for me.

Kimberly, Thank you! and keep that wonderful smile
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Old 09-09-2012, 07:03 AM   #85
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Originally Posted by Yam-Yam View Post
One of my friends said she has a lot of loose skin. She is absolutely beautiful and I've never seen it. She told me she shows off what she can show off, covers up the rest and enjoys her assets (like a gorgeous face and hair and lovely figure. I don't know where she hides all the loose skin but she told me she never wears sleeveless tops because she hates the tops of her arms. )
This works for me. I only wear sleeveless at home. Even with skin brushing this time around I have ugly upper arms and it will take time for me to build up enough muscle and let the skin shrink. So in the meantime I do the cover up and enjoy my weight loss.
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Old 09-09-2012, 07:12 PM   #86
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you, Kimberly. I rarely come to the board because of so much in my "outside life", but I saw this and had to give you big and You're a special, beautiful gal to us... inside and out!
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Old 09-10-2012, 12:27 AM   #87
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I am late chiming in again but wanted to tell you all that working out in the water and doing resistance training in water tightens the skin better than almost anything. I know how you feel though. All women hate certain parts of their bodies it seems. But, hey, I'd rather have a few wobbly spots than live in a body that is unhealthy and won't "go" and do what I want it to. Keep moving if you can so you don't have time to study yourself and throw away all those damn mirrors that are unflattering. When you shop, turn away from the mirror until you have the clothes on you want to try on and wear panty hose when trying on bathing suits. I'm serious!!! Just like people don't see what you would see in a 10X magnifying mirror (putting on make-up....and that IS how we see our own selves)...it helps to remember that people don't notice ALL the things that you notice. Really. More women have body dysmorphia than people even know. My thin 27 year old daughter has it also (5'-7" and 118 lbs.) We are way too hard on ourselves and getting past that obstacle is the probably as big as the weight itself.
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Old 09-11-2012, 09:43 AM   #88
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Thanks for that, we all need to read this... How about starting a new thread?
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Old 09-11-2012, 08:04 PM   #89
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Agreed!! That's some good stuff!!! Thanks Aeroangie!
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Old 09-12-2012, 06:40 AM   #90
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Aeroangie View Post
I am late chiming in again but wanted to tell you all that working out in the water and doing resistance training in water tightens the skin better than almost anything. I know how you feel though. All women hate certain parts of their bodies it seems. But, hey, I'd rather have a few wobbly spots than live in a body that is unhealthy and won't "go" and do what I want it to. Keep moving if you can so you don't have time to study yourself and throw away all those damn mirrors that are unflattering. When you shop, turn away from the mirror until you have the clothes on you want to try on and wear panty hose when trying on bathing suits. I'm serious!!! Just like people don't see what you would see in a 10X magnifying mirror (putting on make-up....and that IS how we see our own selves)...it helps to remember that people don't notice ALL the things that you notice. Really. More women have body dysmorphia than people even know. My thin 27 year old daughter has it also (5'-7" and 118 lbs.) We are way too hard on ourselves and getting past that obstacle is the probably as big as the weight itself.
Wow what a powerfull statment, i thank you for this.. Lots of great ideas here as well,, thanks hun
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