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Old 08-01-2012, 08:45 PM   #1
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Back Where I Started

So I had a great time in California. Even though I didn't win the RITA award, I lost to a seven time winner who was immediately inducted into the Hall of Fame, so that sure takes the sting out of it. You can't be sad when you lose to an all star!

Moreover, I was able to see old friends, connect with editors, strategize my career, get new ideas, and then spend two care-free sunny days with my husband having the first vacation we've had in years. There was only one glass of champagne and one strawberry daiquiri involved. Lots of seafood. Some great desserts. Even so, I found myself making better choices than usual when it came to diet and my husband commented that my appetite seemed to have been much reduced. I would go to a restaurant and order food that I thought might not be enough to satisfy me and yet still end up going home with a doggie bag.

So I was pretty optimistic. On the plane home, instead of talking myself into 'starting again on Monday' as is my usual habit when facing what I know will be prolonged periods of deprivation, I was perfectly content to start JUDDDing again, immediately.

Stepping on the scale this morning, unfortunately, undid my good mood. Somehow, I'd gained back all ten pounds. It was like a punch in the nose.

You see, the most I've ever gained on a vacation--a week long cruise during which I ate everything and anything--was six pounds. So I guess I'd set that as the most damage I could possibly do in a week off plan. And given that I ate reasonably most of the time this trip, I hoped for better. I hoped JUDDD would be forgiving as it is for many people here.

I was ready for six pounds. I was not ready to see a ten pound gain. I was not ready to see any and all progress on JUDDD totally erased.

That threw me into a tailspin such that I put off posting here all day, even though I know that this board is a lifeline and I need to hold on tight. I didn't want to admit to my failure here, but accountability is key, so...I've confessed it though it hurt to change my stats back to my starting weight. It hurt bad.

My biggest fear about JUDDD has been that I'm merely teaching my body that it can exist on 500 calories a day and that the minute I eat any more than that, I'm going to gain weight. My second fear about JUDDD was that I wasn't losing any real weight at all, just water. That it's not going to work for me, etc. Unfortunately, this latest data point supports my fears.

And it's taken me all day to make peace with the fact that it is what it is, and I don't have enough data yet to form a decision. I just have to start over with JUDDD and give it more time.

I don't have many alternatives. If JUDDD doesn't work, WLS is the next step. So I need to give this plan the fullest and fairest chance I can to save my life and my health.

Today was a good down day; actually one of the best I've had. I'd worried that I'd be starting all over with that again too, but it wasn't much of a struggle.

So, I'm back. I wish I had better news.

Last edited by stephdray; 08-01-2012 at 09:27 PM..
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Old 08-01-2012, 09:19 PM   #2
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I think those pounds will come off quickly. I'm sure it was shocking and disappointing to see the gain. Try to put that behind you, and just do the rotations and see what happens.

For me, it seems that weight that was recently lost can come back quickest when I'm off plan. But, unlike on lc, weight that is gained comes off quickly as well.

Hang in there. Praying you will see the forgiveness that is JUDDD within the next couple of dd's.
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Old 08-01-2012, 10:06 PM   #3
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I do have a question for you Steph...how do your clothes fit? While you were on vacation did you notice them getting tighter during the week as you "regained" those full 10 pounds you speak of? I HAVE gained 10 pounds in a week when on vacation and boy do I FEEL it in my clothes. So I guess my point is...your clothes and a tape measure may tell a different story than your scale. I myself am losing at a snail's pace at this point, but clothes keep fitting better every week. Just a thought.
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Old 08-02-2012, 02:27 AM   #4
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Steph, another thought: you hadn't been JUDDDing for very long at all (I know, I know, those DDs seemed like an eternity) before leaving on your trip.
If you began with a "broken" metabolism, one that doesn't have a friendly relationship with caloric intake, the Sirt1 is unlikely to have worked for you while away. In theory, it buffers days of moderately increased caloric intake and non-rotation. I wonder if your gain would have been far less if your trip had been a few weeks later.
I also hear you say that your intake was reasonable while you were away, and I wonder how much of JUDDD's effectiveness is due to reasonable caloric intake and how much is the spread between UD and DD. Maybe weight gain happens if we don't maintain the spread.
I have been uncertain about this Sirt1 thing. Love the theory, haven't seen convincing evidence in my own experience.
I just finished a holiday of UUADs during which I packed on pounds far too quickly for my liking. (Where's the Sirt1, I ask you?) But four of those pounds have disappeared in four days of JUDDDing. Call it water, call it fat, call it hippopotomi if you want. My pants were tight and now they're not. It took me more than a month to lose four pounds when I started here, so something's working differently.
Does it mean I have to do rotations for life? Maybe. I'll take that.
Does it mean I have to recover from every non-rotation holiday? Maybe. But I'll take that, too, particularly if the recovery is fast.
It'll be exciting to see what happens with you over the next week or two.

I'm amazed at how much I'm still learning from this, four months in. There's been a lot of coming face to bloated face with my various resistances, unhealthy habits, and general self-destruction. Brutal, some days, and blissful, others. I am SO happy to be learning while losing and becoming healthier. Beats what I was doing before, which was doing my best to avoid learning while getting fatter and unhealthier.
Hope this week is wonderful for you.
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Old 08-02-2012, 03:21 AM   #5
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Welcome back Stephanie!

I am glad you had a good time at the convention, lost the award to a worthy person, and managed to sneak in a private getaway with DH!

Before you left I wished you had a few more weeks of JUDDD before the convention. It does take time to accumulate that old JUDDD Magic in one's body.

Speaking from seven month's experience, with vacation splurges every two months or so, I have seen changes. The first vaycay was four days, I ate reasonably, and gained six pounds, The latest was slightly over two weeks, included a cruise and a three pound gain. (Nice pattern, huh?) In both cases, it took two DDs to re-lose the gain and move into new territory.

Welcome back. That weight is going to melt away. No failure, just your body adjusting. It is alright.
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I did not "lose" weight. I evicted it. It is gone and it ain't coming back!

JUDDD cares about calories. JUDDD does not care what you eat. Your body probably does.

Last edited by gotsomeold; 08-02-2012 at 03:22 AM..
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Old 08-02-2012, 04:51 AM   #6
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That was a tough number to see Steph. You are so brave to change your stats, well done on your honesty.

I agree with all the great JUDDD BUDDDs before me, you have come back to these boards looking for support and you have got it.

You have done the best thing possible by starting with a good DD. Well done.

I am sorry that you didn't win, but it sounds as if the winner was truly worthy. And I am delighted that you and DH enjoyed your vacation.
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Old 08-02-2012, 06:09 AM   #7
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Steph,
I know that was difficult. I just came back from time spent with my daughter in Chicago, and in 6 days I gained 4.4 pounds-that was with one good DD and the rest trying to watch what I ate. The good news is that after two rotations, 3 of those pounds are off. I am sure you will have the same outcome, too!

Maybe Joyjoy is right about the spread being more important than the "reasonable" calorie amounts. Makes sense...

Anyway, glad you had a good time. Now you are back to normal, the DDs are becoming easier, and the pounds will go. Maybe fast, maybe slow, but as a co-worker said when I told her it had taken me six months to lose 18 pounds---"so what?"
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Old 08-02-2012, 06:22 AM   #8
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No failure here.. you enjoyed your time.. you lived your life.. and weight loss is only "part" of our journey.. Now that your back your DD will recover that water gain.. It takes ALOT of calories for those to all be fat.. So rest assured they will simply fall off within a few DD rotations.. Glad your back and remember,, the only failure is in "quitting"! Much love being sent your way along with that missing "whoosh fairy"..
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Old 08-02-2012, 07:36 AM   #9
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Hey Steph! Glad you had a great time and glad you are back!

As one who frequently travels coast to coast I must point out a couple of things:

1. There is serious water retention involved in air travel. It's all involved with dehydration and the body's desperate need to hang on to any and all fluid. This will drop away in a few days with a few night's sleep and you drinking, drinking, drinking water to rehydrate.

2. Time change messes with your sleep pattern and changes in sleep mess with the hormone Leptin which is produced at night. Leptin is an important weight loss and anti-aging, anti-stress hormone.

3. You may not have been aware of some stress (the excitement and anticipation about who would win, meeting with and wanting to impress editors, etc. ) Stress means cortisol, cortisol sends a signal that you need to hang on to some weight for protection.

Weigh yourself after every DD this week. Try to catch up on your sleep. Drink more water than usual. Eat lots of lean protein. Lots! Protein also encourages your body to release extra stored fluid from body tissue.

Have you heard our saying here? "All gains are water. All losses are fat."

I'm thinking you are in for a big surprise! I gained 9 pounds once on vacation and it was mostly gone after 2 down days (and eating lots of protein on UDs) and all gone with a little extra after 1 more DD.

I am glad you were ready and willing to jump back on the JUDD wagon. I hope you will find it easy and satisfying to get right back into rotations. You will be rewarded.

You have a lot of friends and admirers here to cheer you on and hold you up. You can do this! You CAN!!!
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Old 08-02-2012, 07:40 AM   #10
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Oops, one more thing (as usual from the verbose one). Hope this is not TMI but when I travel, often times I'm not regular. I've heard Dr. Oz talk about this being very normal for most people.

It takes a few days back home and sometimes a bit of extra coconut oil and even Metamucil to get the intestines nice and clean if you kwim?? It is unbelievable how many pounds our intestines can hold and that shows up on the scale.

Your scale is not telling you the whole story. And, when we say JUDD is forgiving, the biggest part of that is how easy it is to get back to rotations and how quickly we are rewarded with the vacation weight coming back off.

I love Cindy's signature: Relax, Rotate, Rejoice, Reduce

Last edited by Yam-Yam; 08-02-2012 at 07:41 AM..
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Old 08-02-2012, 07:52 AM   #11
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back! I'm so happy to see you back and ready to get back to "the grind" which really isn't that much of a grind after all. I read your post this morning as I was heading out the door and didn't have time to respond, but I had a few points I wanted to make. Yam-Yam stole my thunder and gave you all the information I was slowly formulating on my drive to work. I have no doubt most, if not all of those pesky water/stress pounds will be gone soon and all you'll have is the lovely memory of your trip to our fair state.
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Old 08-02-2012, 07:54 AM   #12
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Dang, another important, yet somehow stray thought:

I just read in Richard's book about Leptin that our bodies do not go into true fat burning mode until excess water is lost. That's why we see a quick loss in the beginning and it's a good thing. I don't think all 10 pounds you lost was just water. However, I seriously believe that the 10 you gained is water and waste products. OK, I will shut up now!

I am not leaving until 2 p.m. (CA time) and since I'm all packed and anxious to go, I have too much time on my hands so I'll probably be hanging around here too much.
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Old 08-02-2012, 08:03 AM   #13
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I can't add anything but . What everyone said is on target. I've been in stuck mode since the surgery and even though I keep going up and occasionally down, my clothes still feel okay. Which means .. FLUID! I'm also with you on thinking what else is there besides JUDDD? Starving on xxx amount of calories everyday?

You were doing good before your trip, which means you'll do good once you get back on your rotations and the fluid leaves. Sounds like the Sirt gene is already active, so it won't take long to get back in full mode.

HANG IN THERE!!
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Old 08-02-2012, 08:15 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yam-Yam View Post
Hey Steph! Glad you had a great time and glad you are back!

As one who frequently travels coast to coast I must point out a couple of things:

1. There is serious water retention involved in air travel. It's all involved with dehydration and the body's desperate need to hang on to any and all fluid. This will drop away in a few days with a few night's sleep and you drinking, drinking, drinking water to rehydrate.

2. Time change messes with your sleep pattern and changes in sleep mess with the hormone Leptin which is produced at night. Leptin is an important weight loss and anti-aging, anti-stress hormone.

3. You may not have been aware of some stress (the excitement and anticipation about who would win, meeting with and wanting to impress editors, etc. ) Stress means cortisol, cortisol sends a signal that you need to hang on to some weight for protection.

Weigh yourself after every DD this week. Try to catch up on your sleep. Drink more water than usual. Eat lots of lean protein. Lots! Protein also encourages your body to release extra stored fluid from body tissue.

Have you heard our saying here? "All gains are water. All losses are fat."

I'm thinking you are in for a big surprise! I gained 9 pounds once on vacation and it was mostly gone after 2 down days (and eating lots of protein on UDs) and all gone with a little extra after 1 more DD.

I am glad you were ready and willing to jump back on the JUDD wagon. I hope you will find it easy and satisfying to get right back into rotations. You will be rewarded.

You have a lot of friends and admirers here to cheer you on and hold you up. You can do this! You CAN!!!
I agree with Yam-Yam (as usual ) She says things so much more eloquently than I.

I'll just add that you shouldn't get so down on yourself! I have found that part of my journey here is to change my attitude and perceptions about food along with the "diet." I always offer positive reinforcement to my friends and family - why am I so stingy with myself? Be proud of yourself for not eating so much on vacation and making good choices! You did so well! Yes, 10 lbs. is like But, now, jump back on the wagon. I gained 4 lbs in an "off"' weekend and it came off in 1 DD. Look, it happens. Make some good meal choices for yourself for the next 4 days and drink a lot of water. I find some supplements help me (if you are into that sort of thing).

You are doing fantastic! Don't stop!
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Old 08-02-2012, 08:20 AM   #15
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I love what everyone said.

Missed you, glad you had a great time! I have a feeling this 10 lbs is water and it is going to shock you how fast it will be gone! I am praying for a quick recovery!
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Old 08-02-2012, 11:09 AM   #16
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Update: Down 4 lbs after my first DD after vacation. So, maybe it's true that this will all come back off quickly. I have my fingers crossed!!!

If it does, I will be super thrilled.
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Old 08-02-2012, 11:15 AM   #17
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Old 08-02-2012, 11:17 AM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joyjoy View Post
Steph, another thought: you hadn't been JUDDDing for very long at all (I know, I know, those DDs seemed like an eternity) before leaving on your trip. If you began with a "broken" metabolism, one that doesn't have a friendly relationship with caloric intake, the Sirt1 is unlikely to have worked for you while away. In theory, it buffers days of moderately increased caloric intake and non-rotation. I wonder if your gain would have been far less if your trip had been a few weeks later.
I don't know but I'm inclined to say that it probably would have. Trust me, I wish I'd found JUDDD earlier. The trip was inconveniently timed, but there's nothing to do but go forward! Also, it's just as possible that I would have gained even more weight without JUDDD so who knows.

Quote:
I have been uncertain about this Sirt1 thing. Love the theory, haven't seen convincing evidence in my own experience.
The proof will be in the pudding, won't it? (I'd like to be carrying around less pudding...)

Quote:
I just finished a holiday of UUADs during which I packed on pounds far too quickly for my liking. (Where's the Sirt1, I ask you?) But four of those pounds have disappeared in four days of JUDDDing. Call it water, call it fat, call it hippopotomi if you want. My pants were tight and now they're not. It took me more than a month to lose four pounds when I started here, so something's working differently.
Now that's very valuable information. And I think that's safe to say something's working differently for sure.

Quote:
Does it mean I have to do rotations for life? Maybe. I'll take that.
Does it mean I have to recover from every non-rotation holiday? Maybe. But I'll take that, too, particularly if the recovery is fast.
It'll be exciting to see what happens with you over the next week or two.
Yes, I agree with you. I just had to convince myself of it yesterday when I was so down in the dumps. I just had to put it all in perspective.

Thank you so much for your comments!!!
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Old 08-02-2012, 11:19 AM   #19
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Originally Posted by gotsomeold View Post
Welcome back Stephanie!

Speaking from seven month's experience, with vacation splurges every two months or so, I have seen changes. The first vaycay was four days, I ate reasonably, and gained six pounds, The latest was slightly over two weeks, included a cruise and a three pound gain. (Nice pattern, huh?) In both cases, it took two DDs to re-lose the gain and move into new territory.

Welcome back. That weight is going to melt away. No failure, just your body adjusting. It is alright.
Man, six pounds in four days. That doesn't seem right at all! But I do love how patient you are, and how this WOE encourages taking it, literally, a day at a time. Thank you thank you!
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Old 08-02-2012, 11:25 AM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yam-Yam View Post
Have you heard our saying here? "All gains are water. All losses are fat."
You have me howling over here!!!

Love you!

Quote:
I am glad you were ready and willing to jump back on the JUDD wagon. I hope you will find it easy and satisfying to get right back into rotations.
Weirdly, it was probably the easiest down day I've ever had. I might have even tried fasting the whole day through, but I had a bit of a headache (jet lag?) and thought eating my 500 calories might help. I was quite pleased with the way it turned out, proud of myself for getting directly on the bandwagon with no drama, and physically it kind of felt better too.

Maybe I was just extra motivated, I dunno :P
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Old 08-02-2012, 11:28 AM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KeirasMom View Post
back! I'm so happy to see you back and ready to get back to "the grind" which really isn't that much of a grind after all. I read your post this morning as I was heading out the door and didn't have time to respond, but I had a few points I wanted to make. Yam-Yam stole my thunder and gave you all the information I was slowly formulating on my drive to work. I have no doubt most, if not all of those pesky water/stress pounds will be gone soon and all you'll have is the lovely memory of your trip to our fair state.
And it was a fair state! We visited Getty Villa, which was a real treat for me. I've seen the ruins of villas in Rome, but it's another thing entirely not to have to imagine the roof overhead. It was so easy to visualize what Cleopatra Selene's house might have been like when she visited her family in Rome. Afterwards, we went to eat dinner at Gladstones and walked in the sand with our toes in the Pacific, which seemed to me much more violent than the Atlantic, but awe-inspiring.

The weather was lovely. I did some swimming and hot-tubbing, and even got a little sun tan!
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Old 08-02-2012, 11:33 AM   #22
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Thank you Tina, Barb, Cindy, Scotty, Kimberly, DD80, Sunday and everyone else who made this a safe place to come back to and practice being consistent and not actually falling off the wagon and rolling around in the dirt, brooding for weeks, as is my usual custom.
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Old 08-02-2012, 11:36 AM   #23
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Originally Posted by stephdray View Post
Update: Down 4 lbs after my first DD after vacation. So, maybe it's true that this will all come back off quickly. I have my fingers crossed!!!

If it does, I will be super thrilled.
Whoopee! So glad for you! (I had a similar experience a few weeks back when I went on vacation).
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Old 08-02-2012, 12:15 PM   #24
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Originally Posted by stephdray View Post
Update: Down 4 lbs after my first DD after vacation. So, maybe it's true that this will all come back off quickly. I have my fingers crossed!!!

If it does, I will be super thrilled.
This THRILLS me!!! Happy dance for you! That is a nice one day drop no matter how you slice it!!!

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Originally Posted by stephdray View Post
And it was a fair state! We visited Getty Villa, which was a real treat for me. I've seen the ruins of villas in Rome, but it's another thing entirely not to have to imagine the roof overhead. It was so easy to visualize what Cleopatra Selene's house might have been like when she visited her family in Rome. Afterwards, we went to eat dinner at Gladstones and walked in the sand with our toes in the Pacific, which seemed to me much more violent than the Atlantic, but awe-inspiring.

The weather was lovely. I did some swimming and hot-tubbing, and even got a little sun tan!
Sounds like you had a lovely, lovely dream vacation. I'll be thinking of you in these coming days while I'm splashing around in the Pacific in Oceanside and Coronado. I brought 3 bathing suits. There will be much hot tubbing and drinks at the adult pool near our villa. I do love my ocean. We are not far from Monterey Bay where I live and we get to go there quite a bit as well. So many beaches, so little time.

Right now the best thing about JUDD to me is that I'm not worried or freaking out about gaining any vacation weight no matter how much it is. "I used to have hope. Now I have proof." One of my favorite sayings from the wisdom of TV commercials. I've been JUDDING and vacationing for so many months now, that I know the routine. Anything I gain (is water) and will fall away after I ease back in to rotations.

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Originally Posted by stephdray View Post
Thank you Tina, Barb, Cindy, Scotty, Kimberly, DD80, Sunday and everyone else who made this a safe place to come back to and practice being consistent and not actually falling off the wagon and rolling around in the dirt, brooding for weeks, as is my usual custom.
Great! Great! GREAT!!! No more of that for us. No more. The first time I had a vacay gain, I sort of slinked back here, embarrassed. But, everyone told me their own stories and assured me all was right with the world. There is no failure in JUDD. Just choices. This WOE is all about enjoying life and loving ourselves the way we are and loving the promise of what will be.

The livin' is always easy in JUDD BUDD land.

I love you too!!! You are a DearHeart.

Last edited by Yam-Yam; 08-02-2012 at 12:17 PM..
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Old 08-02-2012, 12:24 PM   #25
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I do have a question for you Steph...how do your clothes fit? While you were on vacation did you notice them getting tighter during the week as you "regained" those full 10 pounds you speak of?
I never know how to answer this question. It might be because of my size, but I never really notice a serious change in the way clothing fits me until we're talking about a twenty pound difference. Sadly, I have gained and lost more than 20lbs numerous times, so I do know that it happens. :P
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Old 08-02-2012, 12:31 PM   #26
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Steph: On the clothing issue: Be mindful that women tend to lose visceral fat first before the subcutaneous fat begins to melt. Not always 100% the case, but for a lot of us it's true. You can research that on line. I just did a Google search with some question like "In weight loss, which fat do we lose first?"

Men lose the sub - fat under the skin first and that's why it's noticeable so fast for them.

Intermittent Fasting supposedly burns fat and preserves muscle at a better and faster rate than other diets.

I forget my exact number but I think I lost almost 20 pounds before I went down a size. When I started JUDD, my sizes started going down really quickly. Could have been that I had already gotten rid of the visceral fat and switched to the subcu-fat burn. Could have been that old JUDD magic.
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Old 08-02-2012, 04:05 PM   #27
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stephdray View Post
Update: Down 4 lbs after my first DD after vacation. So, maybe it's true that this will all come back off quickly. I have my fingers crossed!!!

If it does, I will be super thrilled.
I'll be thrilled for you! Thanks for posting about this ... I feel sure it's going to help others out there in the future. Although I'm new to JUDDD, I'm thinking/hoping/believing it's going to be coming off in a couple/few rotations.
Good for you for jumping back in!

p.s. I also need to lose about 20 pounds before I go down a size.
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Old 08-02-2012, 07:59 PM   #28
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Stick with it!! It will come off fast. We're all pulling for you!
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