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Old 07-05-2012, 11:07 AM   #31
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stephdray View Post
When you people hand-hold, you do it up big, don't you?

I'm so grateful for the support and for each and every one of these replies.


Some of us decided a while back that maybe the SIRT1 gene should be called the "happy gene". It does seem to instigate a feeling of well-being and towards all. Get ready. We don't only hold hands. We are huge huggers!
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Old 07-05-2012, 11:37 AM   #32
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Stephanie, welcome and thank you for writing such a heartfelt and honest post. I think we can all relate to what you've said.

I started my journey at a heavier weight than you. You can see in my stats, and now I'm approaching my goal weight. I won't lie and say it's been easy, but it IS possible and I'm a firm believer in JUDDD as the best tool to get there...and I've done low carb, low calorie, low carb and low calorie, weight watchers (three times), South Beach, and on and on and on.

One thing that struck me about your post. You want to be normal. Well, I think you are. I think I am. I think that Dr. Johnson, who wrote the book that this diet is based on, said that he estimates that one in ten people can eat whatever they want, whenever they want, and remain thin. That's hardly normal. One in ten is hardly average, it's pretty rare.

For me, accepting what and how I am has been central in this weight loss journey. Beating myself up for being defective takes a LOT of emotional energy. It's about the most depleting thing we can do to ourselves. And using up all that emotional energy takes it out of us and keeps us stuck and unable to do the things we want and need to do in order to heal and lose weight and take back control of our lives from the fat monster that has encased our bodies.

What we resist persists. By taking the attitude that I am defective, broken somehow, and that other people don't struggle (all of which are patently untrue) then I place myself in a one-down position vis-a-vis other people. And I feel terrible about myself, and in order to manage those feelings, I eat. Then I berate myself again for being defective and having no self-control, etc and the cycle just continues. I know that you know this.

Try this thought on for size: I am normal. Bodies evolved to store fat for times of famine. I live in an abnormal environment of constantly available food (much of the world even today does not), and societal expectations of extreme thinness. Of course this is difficult!

To say it's difficult is so much more empowering than saying I'm not normal. Difficulty can be overcome, abnormality cannot. Abnormality is a permanent state of being. Weight is not a permanent state of being. I've been overweight, obese, morbidly so, since I was 25 years old. I just celebrated my 49th birthday and for the first time in nearly 25 years I am an average size. Four years ago I was buying 26/28s and today I can wear 12s and 14s. So weight is absolutely a changeable condition.

I am normal. You are normal. This is difficult. But it's doable. There is hope. I think you're finding it.
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"Success occurs in clusters and is born in generosity" --Julia Cameron

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Old 07-05-2012, 11:43 AM   #33
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Luna Loca View Post
Stephanie, welcome and thank you for writing such a heartfelt and honest post. I think we can all relate to what you've said.

I started my journey at a heavier weight than you. You can see in my stats, and now I'm approaching my goal weight. I won't lie and say it's been easy, but it IS possible and I'm a firm believer in JUDDD as the best tool to get there...and I've done low carb, low calorie, low carb and low calorie, weight watchers (three times), South Beach, and on and on and on.

One thing that struck me about your post. You want to be normal. Well, I think you are. I think I am. I think that Dr. Johnson, who wrote the book that this diet is based on, said that he estimates that one in ten people can eat whatever they want, whenever they want, and remain thin. That's hardly normal. One in ten is hardly average, it's pretty rare.

For me, accepting what and how I am has been central in this weight loss journey. Beating myself up for being defective takes a LOT of emotional energy. It's about the most depleting thing we can do to ourselves. And using up all that emotional energy takes it out of us and keeps us stuck and unable to do the things we want and need to do in order to heal and lose weight and take back control of our lives from the fat monster that has encased our bodies.

What we resist persists. By taking the attitude that I am defective, broken somehow, and that other people don't struggle (all of which are patently untrue) then I place myself in a one-down position vis-a-vis other people. And I feel terrible about myself, and in order to manage those feelings, I eat. Then I berate myself again for being defective and having no self-control, etc and the cycle just continues. I know that you know this.

Try this thought on for size: I am normal. Bodies evolved to store fat for times of famine. I live in an abnormal environment of constantly available food (much of the world even today does not), and societal expectations of extreme thinness. Of course this is difficult!

To say it's difficult is so much more empowering than saying I'm not normal. Difficulty can be overcome, abnormality cannot. Abnormality is a permanent state of being. Weight is not a permanent state of being. I've been overweight, obese, morbidly so, since I was 25 years old. I just celebrated my 49th birthday and for the first time in nearly 25 years I am an average size. Four years ago I was buying 26/28s and today I can wear 12s and 14s. So weight is absolutely a changeable condition.

I am normal. You are normal. This is difficult. But it's doable. There is hope. I think you're finding it.
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Old 07-05-2012, 12:05 PM   #34
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Lune: when you said "What we resist persists" WOW!!! Light bulb moment. Thanks for that thought!
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Old 07-05-2012, 01:07 PM   #35
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stephdray View Post
In my life, I've succeeded at everything else I've ever put my mind to--but fat defeats me.
Stephanie - This is a common statement by successful people - Oprah too I think. Weight loss and "maintenance" is a whole other animal. I was convinced years ago it's NOT OUR FAULT - overweight people are not weak-willed, lazy and lacking character. Bah! We can think of soooo many powerful, famous people that haven't been able to lose and maintain weight loss.

Luna - Yes, Yes, Yes to your post.
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Old 07-05-2012, 01:34 PM   #36
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Luna Loca View Post
Stephanie, welcome and thank you for writing such a heartfelt and honest post. I think we can all relate to what you've said.

I started my journey at a heavier weight than you. You can see in my stats, and now I'm approaching my goal weight.
You are truly an inspiration and I've taken to heart all you've said.

Quote:
I won't lie and say it's been easy, but it IS possible and I'm a firm believer in JUDDD as the best tool to get there...and I've done low carb, low calorie, low carb and low calorie, weight watchers (three times), South Beach, and on and on and on.
I've done low carb, low calorie, WW, Atkins, South Beach, Nutri-System (lost my gall bladder after that one), the Rotation Diet, Slim Fast, Cabbage Soup, DASH, and various bastardizations of all those. So I hear you.

Quote:
One thing that struck me about your post. You want to be normal. Well, I think you are. I think I am. I think that Dr. Johnson, who wrote the book that this diet is based on, said that he estimates that one in ten people can eat whatever they want, whenever they want, and remain thin. That's hardly normal. One in ten is hardly average, it's pretty rare.
That's probably true. However, the number of people who can lose weight without radical changes seems to be pretty high. And I resent this. If I had a nickel for every time someone said "All you have to do is cut out candy bars and soda" I would be a very rich woman. Never mind that I can't remember the last time I ate either of those things.

Then there are the people who have never been truly obese a day in their lives, telling you "just eat healthy and exert a little willpower for goodness sake." I had someone tell me that the other day.

I replied, "I will cut you..."

Because I can't actually remember ever being a healthy weight (maybe when I was born?), I know that I'm not normal. And I wish I was. But you're absolutely right to tell me not to let me turn that against myself or anyone else.

Also, congratulations on your success and watch out for that speeding train
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Old 07-05-2012, 02:58 PM   #37
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I completely understand where you are coming from! I wish you all the luck in the world on your journey! And if I figure out the answers along my journey, I'll be sure to post them for everyone to see.
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Old 07-05-2012, 08:40 PM   #38
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stephdray View Post


That's probably true. However, the number of people who can lose weight without radical changes seems to be pretty high. And I resent this. If I had a nickel for every time someone said "All you have to do is cut out candy bars and soda" I would be a very rich woman. Never mind that I can't remember the last time I ate either of those things.

Then there are the people who have never been truly obese a day in their lives, telling you "just eat healthy and exert a little willpower for goodness sake." I had someone tell me that the other day.

I replied, "I will cut you..."

Oh boy can I relate to this. And I agree. It's not normal. It's a disturbed metabolism at work. I have been the healthiest person I know for a very long time. A decade at least. No artificial anything, no processed anything, all whole foods, ferreted out minor problems, tons of exercise, lots of sleep and yet, over 200 pounds.

There's no explanation. Not one people can agree on anyway. I have my suspicions though. I manage to leave every health care practitioner flummoxed when they review my journals and see the level of activity vs. the food choices/calories.

I don't know if JUDDD is magic yet. It's pretty damn good though. And at this point? I'll take pretty damn good. And I'll continue to carry my shank.
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Old 07-05-2012, 08:49 PM   #39
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amlyjo View Post
I've even had WLS. I did the banding procedure. I hate it... I throw up daily from it. Yet I am still 330 lbs. How is that even possible?
Honey, I'm so sorry!!!
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Old 07-05-2012, 09:24 PM   #40
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[QUOTE=amlyjo;15778647]Stephanie, I enjoyed your post immensely, and see myself there too. I was like "she is me, I am her!!!" Except for the great writer part.



I've even had WLS. I did the banding procedure. I hate it. I mean the surgery was fine, recovery was okay (this was before laporscopy - sp?). Now I supposedly have this small stomach that is like a funnel. Everything gets stuck. I throw up daily from it. Yet I am still 330 lbs. How is that even possible?

Wow. And yet you are still here giving it the ole college try! You are my newest hero!! You can do this amlyjo!! and as horribly cliche as this sounds.....we are really all in this together!!
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Old 07-06-2012, 03:04 PM   #41
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I may only be on my 2nd day of JUDDD but I started out where you are weight-wise. I also have never ever been thin in my life. I still have 30 lbs to go until I hit the tip-top of the normal range... but wow, the difference already! I am a size 18 now... I can wear regular sized clothes. People treat me better. I need less sleep. The struggle was so worth it- and still is. I could so easily slip back into my old ways.

I am a firm believer in finding what works best for YOU and doing it. And when it doesn't work any more, find something else that does. And the best piece of advice I can give you for long term success is to hold onto any loss you have and not let yourself gain more than, say, 10 pounds above that before "getting serious" again. The losing may be hard but I think maintaining loss is the real bugger. You can't do a diet that takes so much willpower out of you that it takes months (and countless pounds) to recover from.

I think the whole process of losing then maintaining until you are ready to lose again is important. I think pausing and letting our bodies catch up is vital. How many times have we seen ourselves lose a lot of weight and put it right back on as soon as we relax? The key is to maintain any loss we manage. Like going downs steps... down... flat... down... flat.

Now with JUDDD... perhaps we have the answer to our prayer. "Not dieting" every other day. What a blessing! It's a miracle! I can't wait! I haven't been this excited about a diet in ages!!! Built in respite from hardcore dieting!!!

The only time I ever have normal hunger is when I am pregnant or deep in ketosis. I can't do very low carb all the time. For quite awhile, yes, but always... no. It was shocking to eat a sandwich and again yesterday. LOL! But I think as long as I don't overdo the carbs and have the DDs... I might be able to stave off that eternal hunger! And not feel deprived!

One day at a time... thanks for sharing your story! It is very motivational to read people's accounts from the heart.
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Old 07-06-2012, 03:30 PM   #42
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JHoberer - Whoa!!! Really very excellent advice! I was so impressed. Welcome to JUDDD. Hope JUDDD is the answer to your prayers. It has been for me, so far.

Last edited by Heather; 07-06-2012 at 03:39 PM.. Reason: typo
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Old 07-06-2012, 03:36 PM   #43
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JHoberer View Post
I may only be on my 2nd day of JUDDD but I started out where you are weight-wise. I also have never ever been thin in my life. I still have 30 lbs to go until I hit the tip-top of the normal range... but wow, the difference already! I am a size 18 now... I can wear regular sized clothes. People treat me better. I need less sleep. The struggle was so worth it- and still is. I could so easily slip back into my old ways.

I am a firm believer in finding what works best for YOU and doing it. And when it doesn't work any more, find something else that does. And the best piece of advice I can give you for long term success is to hold onto any loss you have and not let yourself gain more than, say, 10 pounds above that before "getting serious" again. The losing may be hard but I think maintaining loss is the real bugger. You can't do a diet that takes so much willpower out of you that it takes months (and countless pounds) to recover from.

I think the whole process of losing then maintaining until you are ready to lose again is important. I think pausing and letting our bodies catch up is vital. How many times have we seen ourselves lose a lot of weight and put it right back on as soon as we relax? The key is to maintain any loss we manage. Like going downs steps... down... flat... down... flat.

Now with JUDDD... perhaps we have the answer to our prayer. "Not dieting" every other day. What a blessing! It's a miracle! I can't wait! I haven't been this excited about a diet in ages!!! Built in respite from hardcore dieting!!!

The only time I ever have normal hunger is when I am pregnant or deep in ketosis. I can't do very low carb all the time. For quite awhile, yes, but always... no. It was shocking to eat a sandwich and again yesterday. LOL! But I think as long as I don't overdo the carbs and have the DDs... I might be able to stave off that eternal hunger! And not feel deprived!

One day at a time... thanks for sharing your story! It is very motivational to read people's accounts from the heart.
This is what I'm working on right now. Relaxing about the "speed" of the loss, and concentrating on losing/maintaining. Thank you for the reminder.
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Old 07-06-2012, 07:22 PM   #44
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awe sweetheart I am so glad you found us and JUDDD!!!

We all have been in your shoes at one time or another, its a miserable way to live. I can tell you honestly, JUDDD has made everything so much better for me. And hopefully you will get that feeling too! I love not having to worry about food every other day. I also love to know that after a day of no food, I can eat again. I have found its not as hard as I thought it was saving things for UD's. I look forward to some of the meals I have saved. I have 2 kids and a hubby that I still have to cook for, but on my DD's I save what ever meal I made them and have mine for lunch!

Now there are down days I can honestly feel like I could pull a zombie thing and eat just about anything, but I have found little tricks and things to get me through!!! My new best friend has been key lime pie flavored yogurt. It is sweet and sour and 100 cals and will make me quite happy for a few hours!!! exspecially for how hot its been, I freeze it like a popcycle and enjoy it that way too!!

Please do read the sticky posts and ask all your questions!! Dont be afraid to ask them!! This JUDDD group is wonderful with helping. If it wasnt for them I think I might have failed JUDDD a few times now. The support here is unlike any other forum on this site!!

Welcome!!!!! Glad your here!!
__________________
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Current weight: 175 BMI: Obese

1st goal 163 puts me at Overweight!
2nd goal 139 puts me at Healthy weight!
3rd goal 125 puts me at Goal!

Long term, realistic goal....no medications!
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Old 07-06-2012, 10:04 PM   #45
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JHoberer View Post
I am a firm believer in finding what works best for YOU and doing it. And when it doesn't work any more, find something else that does. And the best piece of advice I can give you for long term success is to hold onto any loss you have and not let yourself gain more than, say, 10 pounds above that before "getting serious" again. The losing may be hard but I think maintaining loss is the real bugger. You can't do a diet that takes so much willpower out of you that it takes months (and countless pounds) to recover from.
This really speaks to me.

Quote:
The only time I ever have normal hunger is when I am pregnant or deep in ketosis. I can't do very low carb all the time. For quite awhile, yes, but always... no. It was shocking to eat a sandwich and again yesterday. LOL! But I think as long as I don't overdo the carbs and have the DDs... I might be able to stave off that eternal hunger! And not feel deprived!
I believe that my need for satiation forces me to keep strict low carb on DD's. Today was an up day for me and I ate low carb until my dinner out at Red Lobster with friends. By the end of dinner, I realized I had about 590 calories left to spend, so I had dessert. And I don't regret it. I might regret it tomorrow if it makes me hungrier on a fasting day, but if it's something I can do every now and then without blowing everything, maybe the pain of the DDs can be worth it.

Last edited by stephdray; 07-06-2012 at 10:05 PM..
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Old 07-07-2012, 09:47 AM   #46
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Steph, welcome.
There's no need to add to the beautiful chorus here, but I'm going to.
1. Everybody talks about DDs being hard. They were at the beginning, but man, it's the UDs that have been far more challenging for me and for my crazy relationship with food as comfort, food as punishment, food as anxiety relief, food as soundproofing, etc., etc. I only mention this in case you run into it yourself.
2. Also, from one achiever to another, I want to invite you to grab hands, here, if and when you're thrown from the horse. I found it tough but doable to muscle my way through the first two or three weeks, all the while feeling a familiar diet resistance building steam. I blew it the next week and thought, okay, that's it, another failure.
For some reason - no, not some reason, it was this group of people - I came back and got back on. Realized it might take some "failing" and learning. And that was a bigger victory than I can describe. Now it's easIER (to quote PJ)
3. For some people JUDDD means dieting every second day, and eating to your heart's content on UDs. That ain't the case for everyone! If I ate to my broken-bent-tender-fragile-gorgeous heart's content, I'd be up at 4-5,000 calories per day. So for me it's a diet every day. On UDs I learn to eat what my body needs, on DDs I learn what it is to give my gut a rest. I say this to encourage. Promise.
I'm so happy you're here. Welcome to the party.
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Old 07-07-2012, 02:49 PM   #47
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stephdray View Post
I believe that my need for satiation forces me to keep strict low carb on DD's. Today was an up day for me and I ate low carb until my dinner out at Red Lobster with friends. By the end of dinner, I realized I had about 590 calories left to spend, so I had dessert. And I don't regret it. I might regret it tomorrow if it makes me hungrier on a fasting day, but if it's something I can do every now and then without blowing everything, maybe the pain of the DDs can be worth it.
Welcome Steph! So true about following what works for you the best, and through this WOE I have found I learn most every day something new about how I interact with food, both physically and mentally. This past week I had 2 of THE worst DD in my first 2 months. I looked back at what I ate and realized I had way less protein than other DD's that seemed tolerable. That's me. Some others need lots of bulk, veggies, glucomannan, etc. You will find what is best for you to eat to feel good day to day.

Yes, one of the perks of the UDs is finding that pleasant surprise of having calories leftover! We actually get to CHOOSE for OURSELVES how to spend those calories. And without guilt. Such a sense of freedom in that!

This woe will certainly reward you if you are consistent. Even days we "fail" show us how forgiving JUDDD is, because we still keep losing over time.

I have been obsessed with food/eating/dieting since 10th grade, and I am 51 now. So many of us know your mental as well as your physical struggles. We are here for you, anytime! Most importantly though, I think--be kind to yourself. Healing takes lots of time when we have been "broken" for so long.

Best to you!!
__________________
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Lost 3 pounds from Jan 1 2012 til April 30 2012 by "eating healthy", LC, etc...
Lost 12 pounds from May 1 2012 til September 1 2012 with JUDDD

Down and Up 10-15# every year since 2000 with VLC, semi LC and Carb Cycling
Anticipating forever success with JUDDD!!
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Old 07-07-2012, 04:38 PM   #48
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Start Date: 2/21/12- Low carb (199lbs) 3/28/12 JUDDD (189lbs)
Stephanie!
2 years in a row my MD told me that I should be seriously considering WLS. When I joined here I was down to 199, but I have been up to 230 and am barely 5'2". On February 20th, 2012 I was 199lbs and said if I can not get to 160 by July 12th, 2012 (my 36th birthday) that I would have the WLS. Well, today is July 7th, 2012. I am 165.5 and that's good enough to keep me off the operating table. I am grateful to have found JUDDD and to be the recipient of JUDDD magic! My JUDDD Buddds have NO IDEA how much they support and motivate me and I hope in some small way I have been there for them. Read all the geat info and sheer motivation in the JUDDD threads and give it a try! WLS will always be there if you need it, but IMHO- this is the best way to go. I've lost 33.5 lbs in 4+ months and have only been "on a diet" half the time!
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<---- Before Carly
10.0 lbs lost on LC/low cal. (2/21/12-3/27/12)
65.8 lbs lost on JUDDD (3/28/12- 4/18/13)
75.8 lbs were evicted in less than 14 months!
Called goal on 2/5/13 at 126.8. I can wear size 4P!

See my before and after pictures
http://www.lowcarbfriends.com/bbs/we...ore-after.html
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Old 07-08-2012, 07:38 AM   #49
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Originally Posted by Carly View Post
Stephanie!
2 years in a row my MD told me that I should be seriously considering WLS. When I joined here I was down to 199, but I have been up to 230 and am barely 5'2". On February 20th, 2012 I was 199lbs and said if I can not get to 160 by July 12th, 2012 (my 36th birthday) that I would have the WLS. Well, today is July 7th, 2012. I am 165.5 and that's good enough to keep me off the operating table. I am grateful to have found JUDDD and to be the recipient of JUDDD magic! My JUDDD Buddds have NO IDEA how much they support and motivate me and I hope in some small way I have been there for them. Read all the geat info and sheer motivation in the JUDDD threads and give it a try! WLS will always be there if you need it, but IMHO- this is the best way to go. I've lost 33.5 lbs in 4+ months and have only been "on a diet" half the time!
Oh, Carly. I Heart You!

I'm your height but haven't weighed your highest weight since college. That would kind of be a dream weight for me :P That your doctor would want you to get WLS at that weight sort of surprises me, but I'm so so thrilled for you and you give me hope that this is gonna happen
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Old 07-08-2012, 07:46 AM   #50
Big Yapper!!!!
 
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: New York
Posts: 7,647
Gallery: Carly
Stats: 199/120.0/126.8 5'2" 38yrs Size 20/4P
WOE: JUDDD/ 5:2 to maintain
Start Date: 2/21/12- Low carb (199lbs) 3/28/12 JUDDD (189lbs)
I have a few medical conditions which are not helped by my weight, so I think that is why she was eager for me to have the surgury, but I'm really glad I've been able to do this instead. I can really relate to "being a success" in all other arenas, but baffled by *fat*!
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