you can only change your self, not others

HarleyLady · 12-19-2006, 04:28 PM

fixing the outside is no where fixing the inside, but sure makes it alot more tolleriable, i realize now, i can not change others, only myself, and that is so hard.... you want others to do this or that, or change them, the only thing you can do in this biter sweet world is change yourself, and then by the grace of god, everything comes together and lands safely in place (at this point anyway) I realize the old tapes in my head are still playing the same tunes and always will, but right now, i choose to turn the tunes OFF and not listen to them... i know they are the same, the last 50 years have shown me that over and over again.... every day, every hour, the same thing, the same feelings, as well as the longer term things, work, relationships with others, all other, friends, spouses, children parents...the patterns that come with every stinkin move you make... when i see a pattern or a feeling, i jump out of its way, push it aside by walking, running, working, or my favorite, journaling daily, and i mean daily, if not here, on the other forum sites i am a contributing member of.... i have different freinds at different sites, all sites are different, low carbing, atkins... i love them all and love logging on to 5-10 private messages, i can talk all night in these forums..

then when i come home from work instead of putting on my gown or jammas or sweats, i put on my size 8 jeans and medium shirt even if i am not going anywhere, just so i will not get back into the old patterns of laziness
i would love to go out, but i am fresh out of patience of dating, it is STILL THE SAME... they are married or a drunkard, a criminal, a looser, a bumb all with the pretty outside and the nice attitude at the begining and job that really isnt there... i guess i do have a sign on my back that says, come to me i am stupid and attract loosers. so iwould rather be alone as to deal with that crap, i have soooooooo much to keep me anyway... i am fresh out of patience with others...even my closest freinds who think they know me dont so i am fresh out of them right now too, i find that the ones closest to you that you think are your friend there is this co dependenncy there where you are feeding off each other which is not normal and i now realize that and have lost my few close freind because i have become a new person, a person they do not know, a person i am getting to know, and they are only bring me down, no support, want me to say in pity and i am sooooooooo far out of there and so far gone and never looking back..... my new friends are around the bend.... i will be very cautious.

i recently had a horrible expericence with my best freind of 37 years, she has lived away from here for 25 years so we have talked by phone etc letters etc

well she wanted to come back home, ask me if i would take her in. i loved her dearly as a sister... i had a close friend janet at the time who advised me not to do this... so i let her come to my house thinking what i was thinking, she had a job, a vehicle, sound life, no baggage... unknown to me blind as a bat,stupid as i always am, vunderable, bleive what anyone tells me.. ladddaaa
long long story short, she was on crack....she once wieghed a wopping 265 and here she was barely 100 pounds at the most...she hid it from me saying she was sick, went to the dr and got loritab, quanity 20, i know... i took here to the dr and to get it filled... low and behold...........she put a one in front of the 20 and got it filled for 120 and we both could have gone to jail and i work for the police.....this was for a freaking month and i just got her out of my house last week.... what a releif... janet was more of a friend in 6 months then she was in 37 years...ANOTHER LESSON LEARNED IN LIFE.. I seem to still be learning them on a daily basis.... now she is calling my parents, my job, my children harrrassing them and leaving messages i will not repeat on my cell so i had to get a new number.... nighmare. hun?? oh hold on my son is here and wants me to order him a pizza, that is OK, i eat only the top and not the bread.. that is having your cake and eating it too... i am at goal size 8 i have done this before, not regulary though... well at least she is out... now i have to deal with the after drama, thanks for the post

really
i nneeded that i needed to VENT
__________________

304 highest
225/144/125
I love LOW Carbing
Thanks Dr. Atkins, RIP[/quote][/quote]

6in2007 · 12-19-2006, 05:28 PM

I don't know what to say but (((HUGS)))

Sweetness4713 · 12-19-2006, 05:44 PM

Hi Harley.. I'm new here and just read your post here.. WOW you've been around the world and back again on a roller coaster... So sorry for all this.. But let me tell you this.. No one can take away the fact that you LOOK GREAT!!! You look so young.. Bet this brought a smile to your face.

Thank God I have a husband who loves me.. Whom I've been married to for 26 years.. We dated 3 months and her proposed.. He gave me 2 wonderful children.. A son 24 who is in the military and a daughter 23 who will be getting married next summer. My son married in 2005... One day your prince will come...

CaroleKI61 · 12-19-2006, 06:43 PM

Hi Sweetheart looks like we are having a December turmoil together, hang on Dear this too will end!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! love Carole

24Fan · 12-19-2006, 07:10 PM

{{{{{{{{{{{{{HarleyLady}}}}}}}}}}}

That is some friend but you're right, all you can do is change how you react, not change them.

You've done so well and that's wonderful advice,putting on small jeans and a nice shirt instead of jammies when you walk in the door.

BlueBrooke · 12-19-2006, 07:33 PM

I read this the other day:

"Instead of trying to change someone else, see if you can work on changing yourself."

It's so true and your post made me think of that and go out to find it. The context is pretty darn funny (a yoga question), but the sentiment makes a lot of sense.

Merry Christmas!

Georgia Boy · 12-19-2006, 07:58 PM

Wow that was a mouthfull."Oh hold on my son is here and wants me to order him a pizza."I like that.Just remeber regardless of what others have done to diappoint,you have your children and that is all the reason in the world to be the best you can be and determine never to let them down.

Charski · 12-19-2006, 08:03 PM

Honey, you are NOT stupid or naive, you just have a heart of gold and prefer to find the GOOD in people - it's disappointing when you can't find it any more. Hang in there, don't lose your zest for life, good things are coming for you!!

You've done an awesome job with your weight - so hold your head up high and live life - don't let the bummers out there get you down!

sbarr · 12-19-2006, 08:03 PM

Harley - wish there were words that I could say to bring sunshine today, but, your feelings have to run their course. I went through a terrible breakup last week, finally stopped crying.

The only thing I can say is that you have the most important person in the world, yourself and she is HOT, HOT, HOT.

One consolation, not sure what it's worth - I've hung onto it for dear life. Think of what you're going through now and think of how it would have been if you were at your highest weight. Pretty grim - but, now you can keep your pride, enjoy that hot new look and keep moving forward.

I'm going to have to start dating again - and it's scary. I did sign up for a fairly expensive dating service (at least hoping it will yield those who are solvent and hopefully know what they want instead of insecure and non-committal) and have something lined up for early Jan after I've done some grieving. Time to dust self off and move forward.

One thing I did write in my "hate mail that I never send"

I'm a wonderful person and deserve to be around those who treat me as well as I treat them.

Food for thought...

Hang in there, hon - you're gorgeous, intelligent and things will look brighter. How about a pact - when this thread dies down, repost on 31-Jan and let's see how things look! In fact, I'm going to bookmark it and ask how much things have improved if you haven't posted.

Hugs,

Sandra

AllegraD · 12-19-2006, 10:15 PM

Glad you washed your hands of your situation with your friend. People get in BIG trouble when making changes to Lortab RXs!!! Glad it didn't come back on you!!!

magnolia_petals · 12-19-2006, 10:26 PM

hi...glad you were able to get your "friend" out of your house...you are right, you cannot change people but you can change your perception of them...
you have done great with your weight loss...this brings a higher level of confidence and a feeling that you know you deserve more than what you had in the past, this includes better relationships. And congrats on allowing yourself to learn new lessons to go along with the new you!

a_shimoon · 12-19-2006, 11:10 PM

Your closest friends will surprise you the most. You can never know what to expect. Looks like you handled it well, now you just need to relax.

Enjoy the peace now that she's gone. Hopefully the calls and harassment will stop soon!

basketbalhotty22 · 12-20-2006, 05:00 AM

it sucks to know that you cant change other people
like seriously..
i dont mean to vent within your venting thread
but i mean..theres this one guy and we are sooo good together
like we're so opposite, which is how we get along
but theres just some things/choices about him that i wish he would
fix/change
it sucks...

ugh

how are you doing today?

ixtapacheryl · 12-20-2006, 08:24 AM

Thank you for posting..... it definitely shows you are into introspection and know yourself quite well. I would love to be more like you ..... more insightful personally. Maybe I should start journaling. I tend to think of others all the time and not myself. I push aside my feelings to make others feel good. Not good!

In the long run I am doing others no favors by not knowing myself.

2007 will be a GREAT year for you at the rate you are going! KUTGW and have a very Blessed Christmas.

gavinsmom · 12-20-2006, 09:30 AM

Hey girl........ Your story sounds like something that would happen to me...LOL
I am serious..... my whole life has had nothing but this type of drama in it. My family is crazy, seriously. You are right you cant change them. You just have to focus on you, and yours. The only thing that I can say about going through crap like this, is that it makes you a stronger person. And I honestly believe that God doesnt give us more than we can handle. I have had a horrible up- bringing, but I wouldnt change it, because that would change who I am, and going through what I have been through has made me not want to be like them. It has given me a different perspective on life that others do not have. I am thankful.

I so understand the after drama too, just know that the after drama, means the drama is coming to an end. It is tough too, but just do what needs to be done, and it will pass too. Keep your head up girl....... and you look gorgeous!

monica64 · 12-20-2006, 02:02 PM

monica64

sugarless4life · 12-20-2006, 02:06 PM

Quote:

My family is crazy, seriously. You are right you cant change them. You just have to focus on you, and yours. The only thing that I can say about going through crap like this, is that it makes you a stronger person. And I honestly believe that God doesnt give us more than we can handle. I have had a horrible up- bringing, but I wouldnt change it, because that would change who I am, and going through what I have been through has made me not want to be like them. It has given me a different perspective on life that others do not have. I am thankful.

I could have written these exact words! My family is totally crazy. I've written them off.

Betty

sbarr · 01-31-2007, 09:32 PM

Bump - I said I was going to bump this thread.

How are things going?

Sandra

Quote:

Originally Posted by sbarr

Harley - wish there were words that I could say to bring sunshine today, but, your feelings have to run their course.

Food for thought...

Hang in there, hon - you're gorgeous, intelligent and things will look brighter. How about a pact - when this thread dies down, repost on 31-Jan and let's see how things look! In fact, I'm going to bookmark it and ask how much things have improved if you haven't posted.

Hugs,

Sandra

HarleyLady · 03-02-2007, 12:42 AM

I am doing great. I even made my own low carb forum, without realizing no one can find it if you dont use google etc and i can not afford that, it was fun doing it though.....some how one person did find it somehow. i ahve not posted in about 6 weeks, alot of changes, being sick, getting off low carbing and worked like hell to get back on and drop the 11 pounds gained... it was so hard, i did not think i could do it, but i did, and it was harder than when i first started over a year and a half ago. i can get into my size 8 but another 5 pounds they will fit perfect... it has taken 5 weeks just to loose 6 pounds and when i started low carbing i could loose 15 in a month... please dont get off of low carbing, even if you are sick, it is hell getting back on it and i felt so miserable inside and out, and my glow was gone, with my ego, i gained in my stomach and had to let my work britches out in the waist..... it is sooooooooooo hard to get back on it so just dont get off. i had the problem of not being able to taste anything when i was sick so i kept trying and it really got me in trouble, i was putting hot sauce on stuff to taste it... lol, i have never liked anythig hot.... anyhoo... i have had fun the last week getting my income tax back and going shopping for summer clothes..... i got 8 shirts, 4 pants/jeans/dress. 12 underware, 7 bra's in all colors....i tried on a pair of white jeans today at walmart and they were snug and so i did not get them, i would have had to hem them 4 inches, it is weird how clothes are, i can wear an 8 in some and a 11 - 12 in others.... so now what is my goal?
to stay on low carbing, no fruit, no sugar, no white or yellow veggies,
today i have had yougart, low carb, low carb smothie, low carb adkins bar, some meat cheese and eggs, yesterday was also good.

thanks for the interest and glad to be back... i was so disapointed in myself for being a failure, but i am not,,, i go visted my old co workers next week at a school, they remember me at 225 pounds

lil miss · 03-02-2007, 09:36 AM

YOU are NOT a failure! EVERY one of us is a work in progress, at all times!

mycattaz · 03-02-2007, 09:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HarleyLady

i know they are the same, the last 50 years have shown me that over and over again....

going out to you....

I just have to ask you are 50? Wow!!! you look great for 50...

Snacky · 03-02-2007, 09:44 AM

Hang in there kid, sometimes the only person you can trust is yourself. Hop on that bike and ride, helps me sometimes.

HarleyLady · 03-02-2007, 11:33 PM

still maintaining and it is really really hard you guys.... adding carbs back makes me crave and hungry.. it was much easier when i was losing than maintaining

HarleyLady · 03-02-2007, 11:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mycattaz

going out to you....

I just have to ask you are 50? Wow!!! you look great for 50...

yes i turned 50 dec 2006 unfortuntally...

but it was my goal to loose and look my best for my 50th birthday

Claudius · 03-03-2007, 12:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mycattaz

you look great for 50...

Heh! She looks great for 25...

Shimmerfly · 03-03-2007, 03:55 AM

I went through a lot of what you did with friends when I lost a lot of weight first time around. I do think that as your weight drops your confidence soars. This affected a few of my close friendships with girls in particular, we had this codependency weight misery thing going on. Although I guess I didn't see it as codependency at the time. I removed myself from the weight misery game while they still played. It turned out we didn't really have that much in common after that.

You will find some great people to hang with. Just give it some time.

Sorry about your friend too. I'm so glad she is out of your house.

12-19-2006, 04:28 PM	#1
HarleyLady Senior LCF Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: Tennessee Posts: 479 Gallery: HarleyLady Stats: high weight 300 down to 138 (2005) now 190 WOE: LOw Carbing, nO Sugar/Bread Start Date: Jan 1st, 2004 ( again 12/08)	you can only change your self, not others fixing the outside is no where fixing the inside, but sure makes it alot more tolleriable, i realize now, i can not change others, only myself, and that is so hard.... you want others to do this or that, or change them, the only thing you can do in this biter sweet world is change yourself, and then by the grace of god, everything comes together and lands safely in place (at this point anyway) I realize the old tapes in my head are still playing the same tunes and always will, but right now, i choose to turn the tunes OFF and not listen to them... i know they are the same, the last 50 years have shown me that over and over again.... every day, every hour, the same thing, the same feelings, as well as the longer term things, work, relationships with others, all other, friends, spouses, children parents...the patterns that come with every stinkin move you make... when i see a pattern or a feeling, i jump out of its way, push it aside by walking, running, working, or my favorite, journaling daily, and i mean daily, if not here, on the other forum sites i am a contributing member of.... i have different freinds at different sites, all sites are different, low carbing, atkins... i love them all and love logging on to 5-10 private messages, i can talk all night in these forums.. then when i come home from work instead of putting on my gown or jammas or sweats, i put on my size 8 jeans and medium shirt even if i am not going anywhere, just so i will not get back into the old patterns of laziness i would love to go out, but i am fresh out of patience of dating, it is STILL THE SAME... they are married or a drunkard, a criminal, a looser, a bumb all with the pretty outside and the nice attitude at the begining and job that really isnt there... i guess i do have a sign on my back that says, come to me i am stupid and attract loosers. so iwould rather be alone as to deal with that crap, i have soooooooo much to keep me anyway... i am fresh out of patience with others...even my closest freinds who think they know me dont so i am fresh out of them right now too, i find that the ones closest to you that you think are your friend there is this co dependenncy there where you are feeding off each other which is not normal and i now realize that and have lost my few close freind because i have become a new person, a person they do not know, a person i am getting to know, and they are only bring me down, no support, want me to say in pity and i am sooooooooo far out of there and so far gone and never looking back..... my new friends are around the bend.... i will be very cautious. i recently had a horrible expericence with my best freind of 37 years, she has lived away from here for 25 years so we have talked by phone etc letters etc well she wanted to come back home, ask me if i would take her in. i loved her dearly as a sister... i had a close friend janet at the time who advised me not to do this... so i let her come to my house thinking what i was thinking, she had a job, a vehicle, sound life, no baggage... unknown to me blind as a bat,stupid as i always am, vunderable, bleive what anyone tells me.. ladddaaa long long story short, she was on crack....she once wieghed a wopping 265 and here she was barely 100 pounds at the most...she hid it from me saying she was sick, went to the dr and got loritab, quanity 20, i know... i took here to the dr and to get it filled... low and behold...........she put a one in front of the 20 and got it filled for 120 and we both could have gone to jail and i work for the police.....this was for a freaking month and i just got her out of my house last week.... what a releif... janet was more of a friend in 6 months then she was in 37 years...ANOTHER LESSON LEARNED IN LIFE.. I seem to still be learning them on a daily basis.... now she is calling my parents, my job, my children harrrassing them and leaving messages i will not repeat on my cell so i had to get a new number.... nighmare. hun?? oh hold on my son is here and wants me to order him a pizza, that is OK, i eat only the top and not the bread.. that is having your cake and eating it too... i am at goal size 8 i have done this before, not regulary though... well at least she is out... now i have to deal with the after drama, thanks for the post really i nneeded that i needed to VENT __________________ 304 highest 225/144/125 I love LOW Carbing Thanks Dr. Atkins, RIP[/quote][/quote] __________________ 300 (Top weight in 1992) 225 lbs in (2005) I started low carbing 06/01/2005 and got down to 138 (size 8) "I made it" and maintaining!!! UPDATE 12/08 In the last 6 months I re-gained gained 50 pounds... 2/1/08 restarted low carbing I'MMM BAAACCCCKKKKK

12-19-2006, 08:03 PM	#9
sbarr Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Albany, NY Posts: 3,008 Gallery: sbarr Stats: 203/173/135 WOE: Basic Low carb, slow, steady, some stumbles Start Date: Jan 2005 (again)/15-Apr-2008 (after baby)	Harley - wish there were words that I could say to bring sunshine today, but, your feelings have to run their course. I went through a terrible breakup last week, finally stopped crying. The only thing I can say is that you have the most important person in the world, yourself and she is HOT, HOT, HOT. One consolation, not sure what it's worth - I've hung onto it for dear life. Think of what you're going through now and think of how it would have been if you were at your highest weight. Pretty grim - but, now you can keep your pride, enjoy that hot new look and keep moving forward. I'm going to have to start dating again - and it's scary. I did sign up for a fairly expensive dating service (at least hoping it will yield those who are solvent and hopefully know what they want instead of insecure and non-committal) and have something lined up for early Jan after I've done some grieving. Time to dust self off and move forward. One thing I did write in my "hate mail that I never send" I'm a wonderful person and deserve to be around those who treat me as well as I treat them. Food for thought... Hang in there, hon - you're gorgeous, intelligent and things will look brighter. How about a pact - when this thread dies down, repost on 31-Jan and let's see how things look! In fact, I'm going to bookmark it and ask how much things have improved if you haven't posted. Hugs, Sandra __________________ Don't worry about momentary cheats or stumbles, focus on succeeding in the long run. Always keep your eye on the target and if you stumble, get back up and stay in the race. What we weigh is the result of a meal, a day, a week, a month, a year of choices...

12-20-2006, 09:30 AM	#15
gavinsmom MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Houston, Tx Posts: 2,351 Gallery: gavinsmom Stats: 215/199/140 WOE: Low Carb Start Date: 9/22/08	Hey girl........ Your story sounds like something that would happen to me...LOL I am serious..... my whole life has had nothing but this type of drama in it. My family is crazy, seriously. You are right you cant change them. You just have to focus on you, and yours. The only thing that I can say about going through crap like this, is that it makes you a stronger person. And I honestly believe that God doesnt give us more than we can handle. I have had a horrible up- bringing, but I wouldnt change it, because that would change who I am, and going through what I have been through has made me not want to be like them. It has given me a different perspective on life that others do not have. I am thankful. I so understand the after drama too, just know that the after drama, means the drama is coming to an end. It is tough too, but just do what needs to be done, and it will pass too. Keep your head up girl....... and you look gorgeous! __________________ the greatest success is happiness....

12-19-2006, 05:28 PM	#2
6in2007 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 1,405 Gallery: 6in2007 Stats: 212/161/124 WOE: ATKINS ALL THE WAY Start Date: redid inductions on Dec 1 at 168 to reboot losing	I don't know what to say but (((HUGS)))

12-19-2006, 05:44 PM	#3
Sweetness4713 Junior LCF Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 2 Gallery: Sweetness4713	Hi Harley.. I'm new here and just read your post here.. WOW you've been around the world and back again on a roller coaster... So sorry for all this.. But let me tell you this.. No one can take away the fact that you LOOK GREAT!!! You look so young.. Bet this brought a smile to your face. Thank God I have a husband who loves me.. Whom I've been married to for 26 years.. We dated 3 months and her proposed.. He gave me 2 wonderful children.. A son 24 who is in the military and a daughter 23 who will be getting married next summer. My son married in 2005... One day your prince will come...

12-19-2006, 06:43 PM	#4
CaroleKI61 Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada Posts: 14,719 Blog Entries: 1 Gallery: CaroleKI61 Stats: 414/now 280 /goal weight 199 WOE: Dr. Atkins- I love you! Start Date: February 14 2003	Hi Sweetheart looks like we are having a December turmoil together, hang on Dear this too will end!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! love Carole

12-19-2006, 07:10 PM	#5
24Fan MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Oct 2004 Posts: 2,568 Gallery: 24Fan WOE: Atkins	{{{{{{{{{{{{{HarleyLady}}}}}}}}}}} That is some friend but you're right, all you can do is change how you react, not change them. You've done so well and that's wonderful advice,putting on small jeans and a nice shirt instead of jammies when you walk in the door.

12-19-2006, 07:33 PM	#6
BlueBrooke MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 1,050 Gallery: BlueBrooke	I read this the other day: "Instead of trying to change someone else, see if you can work on changing yourself." It's so true and your post made me think of that and go out to find it. The context is pretty darn funny (a yoga question), but the sentiment makes a lot of sense. Merry Christmas!

12-19-2006, 07:58 PM	#7
Georgia Boy Senior LCF Member Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: macon ga. Posts: 255 Gallery: Georgia Boy Stats: 282/205	Wow that was a mouthfull."Oh hold on my son is here and wants me to order him a pizza."I like that.Just remeber regardless of what others have done to diappoint,you have your children and that is all the reason in the world to be the best you can be and determine never to let them down.

12-19-2006, 08:03 PM	#8
Charski Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Central Coastal CA Posts: 10,673 Gallery: Charski Stats: 174 (WW)/130/150 goal 5'5" 55 years young WOE: ATKINS! now and always.... Start Date: 5/03	Honey, you are NOT stupid or naive, you just have a heart of gold and prefer to find the GOOD in people - it's disappointing when you can't find it any more. Hang in there, don't lose your zest for life, good things are coming for you!! You've done an awesome job with your weight - so hold your head up high and live life - don't let the bummers out there get you down!

12-19-2006, 10:15 PM	#10
AllegraD Senior LCF Member Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 279 Gallery: AllegraD	Glad you washed your hands of your situation with your friend. People get in BIG trouble when making changes to Lortab RXs!!! Glad it didn't come back on you!!!

12-19-2006, 10:26 PM	#11
magnolia_petals Major Procrastinator!!! Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: down south Posts: 9,039 Gallery: magnolia_petals Stats: -7 with an awful lot more to lose! WOE: atkins again! Start Date: 03/31/08	hi...glad you were able to get your "friend" out of your house...you are right, you cannot change people but you can change your perception of them... you have done great with your weight loss...this brings a higher level of confidence and a feeling that you know you deserve more than what you had in the past, this includes better relationships. And congrats on allowing yourself to learn new lessons to go along with the new you!

12-19-2006, 11:10 PM	#12
a_shimoon Senior LCF Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Calgary, AB Posts: 113 Gallery: a_shimoon Stats: 231(orig)/215(restart)/209(now)/170(goal) WOE: Custom (low carb) Start Date: October 11, 2006 (Restart June 08)	Your closest friends will surprise you the most. You can never know what to expect. Looks like you handled it well, now you just need to relax. Enjoy the peace now that she's gone. Hopefully the calls and harassment will stop soon!

12-20-2006, 05:00 AM	#13
basketbalhotty22 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: WI Posts: 1,083 Gallery: basketbalhotty22 Stats: Working my way to a healthier, thinner me WOE: Healthy/Portion Control/lots of exercise Start Date: september 24, 2008	it sucks to know that you cant change other people like seriously.. i dont mean to vent within your venting thread but i mean..theres this one guy and we are sooo good together like we're so opposite, which is how we get along but theres just some things/choices about him that i wish he would fix/change it sucks... ugh how are you doing today?

12-20-2006, 08:24 AM	#14
ixtapacheryl Blabbermouth!!! Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Florida Posts: 5,932 Gallery: ixtapacheryl Stats: 183/147/130-135 - 5'7.5" WOE: '72 Atkins	Thank you for posting..... it definitely shows you are into introspection and know yourself quite well. I would love to be more like you ..... more insightful personally. Maybe I should start journaling. I tend to think of others all the time and not myself. I push aside my feelings to make others feel good. Not good! In the long run I am doing others no favors by not knowing myself. 2007 will be a GREAT year for you at the rate you are going! KUTGW and have a very Blessed Christmas.

12-20-2006, 02:02 PM	#16
monica64 Senior LCF Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Out in the woods in northern Indiana Posts: 184 Gallery: monica64 Stats: 182/geesh/100 highest weight 250 in 2001/ 5'0 44yr WOE: Atkins 1972 Start Date: November 13, 2006	monica64

03-02-2007, 12:42 AM	#19
HarleyLady Senior LCF Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: Tennessee Posts: 479 Gallery: HarleyLady Stats: high weight 300 down to 138 (2005) now 190 WOE: LOw Carbing, nO Sugar/Bread Start Date: Jan 1st, 2004 ( again 12/08)	I am doing great. I even made my own low carb forum, without realizing no one can find it if you dont use google etc and i can not afford that, it was fun doing it though.....some how one person did find it somehow. i ahve not posted in about 6 weeks, alot of changes, being sick, getting off low carbing and worked like hell to get back on and drop the 11 pounds gained... it was so hard, i did not think i could do it, but i did, and it was harder than when i first started over a year and a half ago. i can get into my size 8 but another 5 pounds they will fit perfect... it has taken 5 weeks just to loose 6 pounds and when i started low carbing i could loose 15 in a month... please dont get off of low carbing, even if you are sick, it is hell getting back on it and i felt so miserable inside and out, and my glow was gone, with my ego, i gained in my stomach and had to let my work britches out in the waist..... it is sooooooooooo hard to get back on it so just dont get off. i had the problem of not being able to taste anything when i was sick so i kept trying and it really got me in trouble, i was putting hot sauce on stuff to taste it... lol, i have never liked anythig hot.... anyhoo... i have had fun the last week getting my income tax back and going shopping for summer clothes..... i got 8 shirts, 4 pants/jeans/dress. 12 underware, 7 bra's in all colors....i tried on a pair of white jeans today at walmart and they were snug and so i did not get them, i would have had to hem them 4 inches, it is weird how clothes are, i can wear an 8 in some and a 11 - 12 in others.... so now what is my goal? to stay on low carbing, no fruit, no sugar, no white or yellow veggies, today i have had yougart, low carb, low carb smothie, low carb adkins bar, some meat cheese and eggs, yesterday was also good. thanks for the interest and glad to be back... i was so disapointed in myself for being a failure, but i am not,,, i go visted my old co workers next week at a school, they remember me at 225 pounds

03-02-2007, 09:36 AM	#20
lil miss Blabbermouth!!! Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 5,595 Gallery: lil miss	YOU are NOT a failure! EVERY one of us is a work in progress, at all times!

03-02-2007, 09:44 AM	#22
Snacky Senior LCF Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: KC area Posts: 143 Gallery: Snacky Stats: 282/235/205 WOE: atkins Start Date: 1-1-07	Hang in there kid, sometimes the only person you can trust is yourself. Hop on that bike and ride, helps me sometimes.

03-02-2007, 11:33 PM	#23
HarleyLady Senior LCF Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: Tennessee Posts: 479 Gallery: HarleyLady Stats: high weight 300 down to 138 (2005) now 190 WOE: LOw Carbing, nO Sugar/Bread Start Date: Jan 1st, 2004 ( again 12/08)	still maintaining and it is really really hard you guys.... adding carbs back makes me crave and hungry.. it was much easier when i was losing than maintaining

03-03-2007, 03:55 AM	#26
Shimmerfly Big Yapper!!!! Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Brisneyland Posts: 7,980 Gallery: Shimmerfly Stats: 226/226/under 200 for now WOE: South Beach Shimmkins Start Date: January 1, 2009	I went through a lot of what you did with friends when I lost a lot of weight first time around. I do think that as your weight drops your confidence soars. This affected a few of my close friendships with girls in particular, we had this codependency weight misery thing going on. Although I guess I didn't see it as codependency at the time. I removed myself from the weight misery game while they still played. It turned out we didn't really have that much in common after that. You will find some great people to hang with. Just give it some time. Sorry about your friend too. I'm so glad she is out of your house.