Did I mess up . . . ?

[elyseelyse]

I have never restricted my kids (6 and 3) access to healthy foods. They get their fair share of junk too. I also NEVER tell either of my girls anything about my food restrictions. But, I noticed my 6 year old DD "counting" something that she was eating. What was she doing - not sure exactly. It looked like she was trying to figure something out about her food (it was apple jacks and blueberries). I ask and she said it was just a fun game. Do you really think that is all it was and I am making something out of nothing because I am sensitive to what I put in my own mouth? Or, has she been watching me closer then I thought and now is "concerned" about something regarding her own food. She throws the bun away when we have burgers 'cause I do it, but that is really all I have noticed up to now. She likes so many more foods than me, so I never thought anything of her throwing away then bun. Maybe I should have? Thanks for any input here.

[stews]

she may very well have been just counting. at that age they like to do that sort of thing. sort out like thigns and count, group together, etc.


I wouldn't worry about it right now but keep your eyes open. mabye ask her to teach ya the fun game so you can play too.

[MyCannelloni]

Elyse, this has been a touchy subject here in the past.

My older daughter (6) knows all about my food restrictions but I don't mention weight to her. She knows that I have hypoglycemia and have had gestational diabetes and must avoid junk food in order to avoid type II diabetes. She understands that I created a lot of my own problems by not eating the healthy things my mom served and eating junk food instead.

She seems to have a great attitude toward food - absolutely appreciating doughnuts now and then but also loving healthy food.

[sugarfreedee]

Ah, elyse i wouldn't worry about it. I'm sure she is just counting. She is too young to fully understand dieting. Good for her for throwing away the bun!
There is nothing wrong with teaching good eating habits. As long as you have plenty of fruits and veggies available for the kids, i don't see a problem.

[Denise85]

My dd is 4 and counts her food all of the time. It's a game to her and nothing more. Sometimes she sorts by color too. I never mention weight and food to her. I had bulimia for 6 years and am very scared for my girls so I make sure to never mention weight and saying any food is bad.

[Wife of a Vet]

Sounds to me more like she's learning. And that would be a good thing!!

I'd agree with Stews, ask her to teach you - young ones love teaching something to mom - not only will you know what she's counting, you'll have another fun activity to share with your daughter and another Quality moment of sharing and loving.

[elyseelyse]

Thanks guys for encouraging me to see it as a child's game at first and not get too worked up. Over the last few days she is continuing to play this way - but I think whatever it is she is trying to do w/ her food probably has something to do with me trying to count my carbs and cals (she has asked what I am doing when I read labels in the store but I tell her it is to figure out how to make healthy decisions). It makes the food taste better - I assume that is what she meant when I asked how the game is played, . . . . the "rules" kept changing as the explanation got longer and more confusing and more fantasy driven, typical 6 year old response.

[Luvmykidz]

Children imitate just about everything. Especially when they respect the person they are copying. I don't see anything wrong with teaching your children about what foods make good healthful choices if they are receptive to it at this time.

Just don't make a huge deal about "fattening" or "good and bad". If they see and imitate mommys good choices (as long as mommy is keeping things in perspective) it can go a long way toward preventing future food obsessions and body image issues.

Keep the main focus on making good choices rather than "can't have this and can't eat that", and I expect you will be allright.

[Jesi]

I'm dealing w/ something similar with my 4 (almost 5yo) son. He has started talking about not wanting "junk-food" and not drinking too much juice b/c of the sugar. At first I was a little worried, but instead have taken these opportunities to talk to him about what food we eat and why. He is learning that some things are healthy and give us energy and some things are yummy but don't give us energy. We don't focus on it, and I talk about it with the same fervor that we talk about the garbage man or the electricity...it's all learning

[teachlady]

Good for you being so aware of your daughter. Yes, I think she is watching you, so like the others have said, this is your chance to emphasize healthy eating and not label food "good" or "bad". What you teach her now will determine how she views food as an adult.

I'm an elementary school teacher and, the past many years, I've started noticing that the girls that are concerned about 'their weight' and what they're putting into their mouths are getting younger and younger . I know a lot of it is just mimicking what they've heard at home or in the media and don't really 'know' what they're saying.
But by the time they reach my class, the 6th and 7th grade - 12 and 13 yrs. old, I have girls that are skipping breakfast and lunch, they don't eat the entire day at school except for maybe a diet pepsi, because they're afraid of "getting fat".
I would say that I have at least one or two girls every school year that drastically lose weight, to the point that both their parents and I become alarmed and we have to step in and do something.

Because of this, I do a health unit every school year that teaches healthy eating habits, and stress to my class how wonderful it is to have a strong, healthy body. It's a hard battle to fight, because these girls are constantly inundated by the media and the idols they look up to, to be skinny, skinny, skinny.

You are your daughter's hero. She will listen to you more than anyone else in the whole world. Teach her, by your words and actions, what it is to be a well adjusted, happy human being, where your eating choices are not all consuming, but rather just a microscopic part of the bigger picture of what we call Life.

[Shantony]

I don't tell the littler ones but my 12 year old I tell him that I don't want to eat this or that. He says "You can't have that mommy?" I say, I can have whatever I want. I just choose not to because i'm tired of being fat. He says oh. But I've been changing all of our lifestyles. I'm a health educator and I have always talked about healthy foods and unhealthy foods to my kids.

But we don't call people fat. Brother's don't call sister fat or anybody else. We just talk about getting healthy or unhealthy.

[marlena]

When my kids were little they counted all sorts of things. Some of it is just a game, som eis learning, some is just making sense out of the world by ordering it in categories. My younger sonalways had the pencils in his desk arranged smallest to biggest - go figure.