He broke up with me

everythingstaken · 03-21-2006, 12:20 PM

I encouraged him to do his military time in Italy, so that he didn't lose his dual citizenship.

I haven't talked to him in 6 weeks because he was too busy. I kept myself as busy as possible and pretty much ran myself into the ground trying to deal with not being able to talk to my boyfriend or best friend of 3 years.

I made a point not to tell him anything bad in emails. No matter how much it was killing me I only sent him positive things, trying to be supportive.

Today he talked to me... and told me to do what I needed to do to make my life normal without him in the picture and that he would call me when he got back from Italy. Without giving me any time to reply he then told me he loved me, and that he was sorry but he couldn't deal with this on his plate too, said goodbye and hung up.

This had really been one of those days when I wish I hadn't woken up to begin with, and now it's turned into one that I wish would just end everything for good.

beckyb17 · 03-21-2006, 12:49 PM

sillykimmie · 03-21-2006, 12:50 PM

I am so sorry for your situation... prayers for you.

Tylar_Connar · 03-21-2006, 01:49 PM

afrodite · 03-21-2006, 05:32 PM

I'm sorry

Take care of yourself, this too shall pass even if it doesn't seem like it will right now. Hang in there.

ClaireDeLune · 03-21-2006, 05:43 PM

God, I am so sorry you're hurting right now, but it will get better. I've had my ups and downs this past year too and you do get over them. In a few months, you'll be looking back and it won't seem as painful as it does now. HUGS!!

Brenda

CarolynF · 03-21-2006, 05:45 PM

Gosh..prayers and hugs being sent your way. Focus on yourself..because you are very special...and treat yourself very gently at this difficult time..

lalabella · 03-21-2006, 11:21 PM

I remember you went through a bad break up last year too. Awful! I have been through some similar situations as well...

You are an amazing woman and you will get through this...
Take extra good care of yourself! Day by day you will start to feel better.

layla01 · 03-22-2006, 01:31 AM

I too went through a terrible breakup,I am still going through it now,If you read my journal you can read all the details.I would love to tell you that tomorrow will be better but these things take time.All I can tell you is that one day you WILL realize the purpose for this breakup in your life.I don't know if you believe in god or not but I do know that we have to trust god sometimes and know that our life is as god wants it,not how we want it.Sometimes if we give to much of ourselves to something other than god he will take it away from us so that we remember to focus on him,and to live according to his will.
Time is all that can heal your pain. and my heart,and many hugs go out to you because I know your pain,And sometimes I don't want to get out of bed..But life must go on...And the way that I see it now you have more time to better yourself for the perfect man that does have time for you....feel free to send me a PM....if you really need to chat...I am here for ya......

everythingstaken · 03-22-2006, 04:01 AM

lala, yeah. This one is quite different from the last one, though both are heartbreaking. It's funny cause the only two times I've been broken up with are right in a row. This guy is my best friend, and I know that we'll be friends still at least but ... I dunno, maybe we'll get through this.

Layla - Thank you for the words, the funny thing is that every time I thought about him, since I had no way to contact him, I prayed for him. That he would be safe, happy, that his son would be ok, etc. The whole thing is such a shock that at first I didn't think it really happened. He's been my best friend for years, so when we started dating again it was just natural and perfect. I keep trying to remember all the bad things... you're right, the fact that he really didn't have a lot of time for me even when he wasn't in Italy. It would be nice to have someone who's world revolved around you instead of them, but alas... I'm not looking to be with someone, I was just happy to be with him.

The thing that kills me the most is that I have no way to contact him but by email, so all I can do is wait. A lot.

jada · 03-22-2006, 04:12 AM

hey we here for you, things will turn out ok, i promise

Zenngrl · 03-22-2006, 07:55 PM

lalabella · 03-23-2006, 12:50 PM

Yeah you never know.. things may work out in the long run with him. But the thing is, you are really doing great and taking such good care of yourself and feeling good about yourself and men will be knocking each other out of the way to get to know you.

I know that doesn't sound good right now... but I do know that change can be very hard, but it can also bring wonderful things into your life.

Hang in there sweetie.

JanMarie3 · 03-23-2006, 01:59 PM

so sorry you are hurting right now

Cookie41 · 03-26-2006, 02:07 AM

"Oh" I am so sorry this happend to you.. This happend to me and it made me feel so sad I couldent eat or sleep for weeks but tonight I went out with my brother and had a good time so I guess it does get better with time but I still think of him he was such a big part of my life. I wish only the Best for you!

skinyguy · 03-31-2006, 10:53 AM

u cant force someone to love u... the way he terminated the relationship shows the coldness in his heart... count it a blessing that it has happened now and not after two or three kids...

life is short... put him in the past... seek the counsel of God... lock urself in the closet and pray for guidance and healing... the pain will pass.. trust that the Lord knows ur heart and will at the appropriate time reveal that special someone to u... then happiness will reign in ur life...

i will keep u in my prayers..

gettingstrength · 04-01-2006, 01:02 PM

tattoonike · 04-03-2006, 07:38 PM

I noticed it was mostly females responding to your post so I thought a guy's opinion might help. The military does things to your head. I'm in the Middle East right now, so trust me. Do what he says, keep yourself together and keep living life as if nothing is wrong. Keep up your support for him through short emails or e-cards every couple of months (Stay Positive) Keep it simple, wish him the best but let him know you are still his friend and you still miss him. Sweety, guys say stupid **** sometimes and we don't mean it. I did the same thing to my wife of 7 years and she just left me a few months ago. I would give anything to take back the things I said. I treated her like she didn't matter and the truth is she was God's greatest gift to me(But I didn't realize it till she was gone). She won't even talk to me now and I may never have a family with her or ever talk to my best friend again. Trust me, I know the suicide feeling. I lost my wife, 2 weeks later my grandmother, who raised me died, then my dog died a week after that. I use the pain to drive me to transform myself back into the person my wife fell in love with. Keep your head up and pray, God listens and loves to test his favorite souls. God Bless You, you will be in my prayers, Ryan

EnufsEnuf · 04-05-2006, 08:49 AM

I'm so sorry!

(((((hugs)))))

Susie Q · 04-05-2006, 05:56 PM

Youre definately in my prayers! The lord must want to spend some special time with you before he puts you together with who he wants you with. Thanks Ryan for the great post!

Susie Q

03-21-2006, 12:20 PM	#1
everythingstaken MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Tampa, FL Posts: 1,319 Gallery: everythingstaken Stats: 280/202/160 WOE: The poor man's diet. Ketosis! Start Date: June 24th, 2005	He broke up with me I encouraged him to do his military time in Italy, so that he didn't lose his dual citizenship. I haven't talked to him in 6 weeks because he was too busy. I kept myself as busy as possible and pretty much ran myself into the ground trying to deal with not being able to talk to my boyfriend or best friend of 3 years. I made a point not to tell him anything bad in emails. No matter how much it was killing me I only sent him positive things, trying to be supportive. Today he talked to me... and told me to do what I needed to do to make my life normal without him in the picture and that he would call me when he got back from Italy. Without giving me any time to reply he then told me he loved me, and that he was sorry but he couldn't deal with this on his plate too, said goodbye and hung up. This had really been one of those days when I wish I hadn't woken up to begin with, and now it's turned into one that I wish would just end everything for good. __________________ 101 Reasons to Exercise!

03-21-2006, 05:43 PM	#6
ClaireDeLune Junior LCF Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Canada Posts: 23 Gallery: ClaireDeLune Stats: 162/155/140~135 WOE: Atkins Start Date: March 2006	everythingstaken God, I am so sorry you're hurting right now, but it will get better. I've had my ups and downs this past year too and you do get over them. In a few months, you'll be looking back and it won't seem as painful as it does now. HUGS!! Brenda

03-22-2006, 01:31 AM	#9
layla01 Senior LCF Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: WomenarefromVENUS... Posts: 319 Gallery: layla01 Stats: 255-194-150 WOE: WhateverWorks Start Date: 02/12/06-@218lbs.	i feel for you sweetie.... I too went through a terrible breakup,I am still going through it now,If you read my journal you can read all the details.I would love to tell you that tomorrow will be better but these things take time.All I can tell you is that one day you WILL realize the purpose for this breakup in your life.I don't know if you believe in god or not but I do know that we have to trust god sometimes and know that our life is as god wants it,not how we want it.Sometimes if we give to much of ourselves to something other than god he will take it away from us so that we remember to focus on him,and to live according to his will. Time is all that can heal your pain. and my heart,and many hugs go out to you because I know your pain,And sometimes I don't want to get out of bed..But life must go on...And the way that I see it now you have more time to better yourself for the perfect man that does have time for you....feel free to send me a PM....if you really need to chat...I am here for ya...... __________________ [myjournal

03-26-2006, 02:07 AM	#15
Cookie41 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Arizona Posts: 1,341 Gallery: Cookie41 WOE: Atkins Start Date: 1/14/06	So Sorry "Oh" I am so sorry this happend to you.. This happend to me and it made me feel so sad I couldent eat or sleep for weeks but tonight I went out with my brother and had a good time so I guess it does get better with time but I still think of him he was such a big part of my life. I wish only the Best for you!

04-03-2006, 07:38 PM	#18
tattoonike Junior LCF Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 4 Gallery: tattoonike	He said he loved you I noticed it was mostly females responding to your post so I thought a guy's opinion might help. The military does things to your head. I'm in the Middle East right now, so trust me. Do what he says, keep yourself together and keep living life as if nothing is wrong. Keep up your support for him through short emails or e-cards every couple of months (Stay Positive) Keep it simple, wish him the best but let him know you are still his friend and you still miss him. Sweety, guys say stupid **** sometimes and we don't mean it. I did the same thing to my wife of 7 years and she just left me a few months ago. I would give anything to take back the things I said. I treated her like she didn't matter and the truth is she was God's greatest gift to me(But I didn't realize it till she was gone). She won't even talk to me now and I may never have a family with her or ever talk to my best friend again. Trust me, I know the suicide feeling. I lost my wife, 2 weeks later my grandmother, who raised me died, then my dog died a week after that. I use the pain to drive me to transform myself back into the person my wife fell in love with. Keep your head up and pray, God listens and loves to test his favorite souls. God Bless You, you will be in my prayers, Ryan

03-21-2006, 12:49 PM	#2
beckyb17 Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Boilermaker Country Posts: 12,858 Gallery: beckyb17 Stats: 60 pounds ago WOE: Yo~Yo diet

03-21-2006, 12:50 PM	#3
sillykimmie MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: The Evergreen state Posts: 1,420 Gallery: sillykimmie WOE: soon to be parking it on the south beach..	I am so sorry for your situation... prayers for you.

03-21-2006, 01:49 PM	#4
Tylar_Connar Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Nov 2005 Posts: 12,439 Gallery: Tylar_Connar Stats: 198177150 WOE: 27 lbs to go for now Start Date: 10/14/06-165, 11/23/07 180

03-21-2006, 05:32 PM	#5
afrodite Blabbermouth!!! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Virginia Posts: 6,109 Gallery: afrodite Stats: 270/208/125-135 BMI 44.2/34.1/21 WOE: Moderate carbs	I'm sorry Take care of yourself, this too shall pass even if it doesn't seem like it will right now. Hang in there.

03-21-2006, 05:45 PM	#7
CarolynF Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Kansas Posts: 20,522 Gallery: CarolynF Stats: 195/150/139 WOE: Eat Fat, Get Thin/I Can Make You Thin Start Date: January 2001	Gosh..prayers and hugs being sent your way. Focus on yourself..because you are very special...and treat yourself very gently at this difficult time..

03-21-2006, 11:21 PM	#8
lalabella MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Northern California Posts: 1,671 Gallery: lalabella Stats: 269/249/160-ish 5'9" Start Date: restart Oct 08	I remember you went through a bad break up last year too. Awful! I have been through some similar situations as well... You are an amazing woman and you will get through this... Take extra good care of yourself! Day by day you will start to feel better.

03-22-2006, 04:01 AM	#10
everythingstaken MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Tampa, FL Posts: 1,319 Gallery: everythingstaken Stats: 280/202/160 WOE: The poor man's diet. Ketosis! Start Date: June 24th, 2005	lala, yeah. This one is quite different from the last one, though both are heartbreaking. It's funny cause the only two times I've been broken up with are right in a row. This guy is my best friend, and I know that we'll be friends still at least but ... I dunno, maybe we'll get through this. Layla - Thank you for the words, the funny thing is that every time I thought about him, since I had no way to contact him, I prayed for him. That he would be safe, happy, that his son would be ok, etc. The whole thing is such a shock that at first I didn't think it really happened. He's been my best friend for years, so when we started dating again it was just natural and perfect. I keep trying to remember all the bad things... you're right, the fact that he really didn't have a lot of time for me even when he wasn't in Italy. It would be nice to have someone who's world revolved around you instead of them, but alas... I'm not looking to be with someone, I was just happy to be with him. The thing that kills me the most is that I have no way to contact him but by email, so all I can do is wait. A lot.

03-22-2006, 04:12 AM	#11
jada MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: johannesburg, South Africa Posts: 1,127 Gallery: jada WOE: low carb Start Date: 28/07/05	hey we here for you, things will turn out ok, i promise

03-22-2006, 07:55 PM	#12
Zenngrl Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Ohio Posts: 4,125 Gallery: Zenngrl Stats: Nunya :O) WOE: Low Carb, my way!

03-23-2006, 12:50 PM	#13
lalabella MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Northern California Posts: 1,671 Gallery: lalabella Stats: 269/249/160-ish 5'9" Start Date: restart Oct 08	Yeah you never know.. things may work out in the long run with him. But the thing is, you are really doing great and taking such good care of yourself and feeling good about yourself and men will be knocking each other out of the way to get to know you. I know that doesn't sound good right now... but I do know that change can be very hard, but it can also bring wonderful things into your life. Hang in there sweetie.

04-01-2006, 01:02 PM	#17
gettingstrength Big Yapper!!!! Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Tennessee Posts: 9,523 Gallery: gettingstrength Stats: 184 / 170 / ? WOE: atkins Start Date: 6 / 1 / 2002

03-23-2006, 01:59 PM	#14
JanMarie3 Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Under the Gateway Arch Posts: 3,586 Gallery: JanMarie3 Stats: 140/134/125 5'3" WOE: Atkins Start Date: Registered: August 2000	so sorry you are hurting right now

03-31-2006, 10:53 AM	#16
skinyguy Junior LCF Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 9 Gallery: skinyguy	u cant force someone to love u... the way he terminated the relationship shows the coldness in his heart... count it a blessing that it has happened now and not after two or three kids... life is short... put him in the past... seek the counsel of God... lock urself in the closet and pray for guidance and healing... the pain will pass.. trust that the Lord knows ur heart and will at the appropriate time reveal that special someone to u... then happiness will reign in ur life... i will keep u in my prayers..

04-05-2006, 08:49 AM	#19
EnufsEnuf Senior LCF Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 229 Gallery: EnufsEnuf Stats: 245.5/227.8/165 WOE: Atkins Start Date: January 2006	I'm so sorry! (((((hugs)))))

04-05-2006, 05:56 PM	#20
Susie Q Senior LCF Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 789 Gallery: Susie Q Stats: 165/140/135 WOE: Atkins by the Book	Youre definately in my prayers! The lord must want to spend some special time with you before he puts you together with who he wants you with. Thanks Ryan for the great post! Susie Q

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