I got dumped by BF and ruined my diet

aprilfool2 · 02-05-2006, 08:01 PM

I just got dumped by BF this afternoon and I didn't know what to do.
I ate all the carbs I could see to make me feel better. I totally ruined my first week of induction.
I am having chest pains right now and I want to cry but no tears are coming out.
It feels like the world fell on me.
Please help on how to cope.
This is the first time I got dumped, normally I am the one who dumps my ex-BFs.

sillykimmie · 02-05-2006, 10:00 PM

April2,

I am so sorry that this happened to you!! I have been there, as many have but that doesn't make it any easier...

I am a new poster but have been a long time lurker, stay with these boards and post often. There is so much support here, with people who care. Drop back often, I will listen

so will many... blessings to you, kim h.

aprilfool2 · 02-05-2006, 10:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sillykimmie

April2,

I am so sorry that this happened to you!! I have been there, as many have but that doesn't make it any easier...

I am a new poster but have been a long time lurker, stay with these boards and post often. There is so much support here, with people who care. Drop back often, I will listen

so will many... blessings to you, kim h.

Thanks, Kim!
The hard part is he did it via e-mail and he didn't say why.
He just said he cannot be with me anymore.
How can I get closure if I don't know the reason why he dumped me.
I've been reading a lot of articles now on the internet, and they all said
I shouldn't contact him anymore, but just move on. I don't know how to
do that yet.....

Cookie41 · 02-06-2006, 01:45 AM

I am so sorry..but at least he told you in a strange way..mine left me and diddent tell me I got worried because I had not heard from him in a month and called his house another woman answered and said she was living there! I almost fainted!! I was with him for four years I trusted him and believe him when he said I love you ..I still don't know how to deal with it but im trying...It does help to go shopping, movies is not a good thing for me to do we went to a lot of movies, it helps to do things that you did not do together and make new memories. I wish you the Best! I am trying one day at a time. This happend to me on 1/1/06

kstmommy · 02-06-2006, 05:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by aprilfool2

I ate all the carbs I could see to make me feel better.

Did it work? Not for me it didn't. All I got from doing that was MORE misery months later with extra weight, ALL because of some jerk. I have SOOOO been there. DO NOT, and I repeat, DO NOTTTTTTTTTTTTT let HIM control your success.

Hang in there, it WILL get better with time.

aprilfool2 · 02-06-2006, 06:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cookie41

I am so sorry..but at least he told you in a strange way..mine left me and diddent tell me I got worried because I had not heard from him in a month and called his house another woman answered and said she was living there! I almost fainted!! I was with him for four years I trusted him and believe him when he said I love you ..I still don't know how to deal with it but im trying...It does help to go shopping, movies is not a good thing for me to do we went to a lot of movies, it helps to do things that you did not do together and make new memories. I wish you the Best! I am trying one day at a time. This happend to me on 1/1/06

Oh, Cookie41, I am so sorry it happened to you too and on New Year's day even.
I have been up all night since it just happened yesterday thinking about everything. And he was the reason why I am trying to lose weight, because he said I am fat but he didn't mind.
Now I am left without pride because he knew I was crazy about him. I feel like a total loser. I want revenge and I want to let him know I wasn't that crazy about him after all. I want him to feel the pain.
I'm thinking of sending him an e-mail to tell him that, but I may just sound bitter. We were just together for 3 months. I think he just used me to help him with his project at work. And he dumped me now that the project is all done.
Did you ever confront him after this happened to you?
I don't think I will have closure unless he knows that the breakup didn't affect me much. I just want my pride back.

aprilfool2 · 02-06-2006, 06:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kstmommy

Did it work? Not for me it didn't. All I got from doing that was MORE misery months later with extra weight, ALL because of some jerk. I have SOOOO been there. DO NOT, and I repeat, DO NOTTTTTTTTTTTTT let HIM control your success.

Hang in there, it WILL get better with time.

Eating all the carbs made me feel better for a few minutes.
Right now, I think I have lost my appetite, I had to force myself to drink coffee this morning. Maybe, that's the upside of being heartbroken, I can lose weight eating less.

RobinB · 02-06-2006, 08:49 AM

Envision yourself thin and running into him at the mall a year from now (or where ever) and think how sorry he will be because you

will be HOT!!!!

Barbara690 · 02-06-2006, 10:26 AM

Looking good is the best revenge......the upside to that is that you will feel better and be healthier.Remember you can change how you look on the outside but he will always be the jerk on the inside.

aprilfool2 · 02-06-2006, 10:45 AM

Thanks for all the support.
I just found out that my ex-BF is married and I have now confirmed my fear that he just used me to help him on his work project. How painful!
I don't know how I can cope with this.....

Saracat · 02-06-2006, 11:27 AM

You will cope with this by knowing you are the better person. He is the slime, you are NOT.Get back on track and let yourself be the beautiful person you know you are. Thank goodness this is ended! Would you have wanted to continue to be duped? Now you are free to make a new beginning. This is a good thing! You deserve better and you are going to get it. Pity his poor wife. What a jerk!

kstmommy · 02-06-2006, 12:31 PM

Sara is exactly right. What an ass. You'll be so much better off and can start a new life.

Cookie41 · 02-07-2006, 02:00 AM

I tried to call him at his office but he never would answer so I just quit calling I don't want him to think I am hurt he would just love that.
The first two weeks were unbareable I couldnt sleep or eat but all the time I told myself over and over agian That I am Someone Special! And He Will Not Rule My Life!
I was happy before he came into my life a little lonley but happy and I will get back to being happy! Joining this message board has save my life I read and post and it takes my mind off thinking about him *Thanks All*

You have all your Pride he is the one that does not! I believe that when one door is closed in are case slammed in the face there is another one much much better waiting for me to open! Im a good person and so are you and I think we deserve Better!!

Cookie41 · 02-07-2006, 02:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Barbara690

Looking good is the best revenge......the upside to that is that you will feel better and be healthier.Remember you can change how you look on the outside but he will always be the jerk on the inside.

Amen

That is the best advice I have ever read!

aprilfool2 · 02-07-2006, 07:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cookie41

I tried to call him at his office but he never would answer so I just quit calling I don't want him to think I am hurt he would just love that.
The first two weeks were unbareable I couldnt sleep or eat but all the time I told myself over and over agian That I am Someone Special! And He Will Not Rule My Life!
I was happy before he came into my life a little lonley but happy and I will get back to being happy! Joining this message board has save my life I read and post and it takes my mind off thinking about him *Thanks All*

You have all your Pride he is the one that does not! I believe that when one door is closed in are case slammed in the face there is another one much much better waiting for me to open! Im a good person and so are you and I think we deserve Better!!

Thanks for replying back, Cookie41.
This is just the third day for me and I agree it is unbearable. I hope I can pass this stage soon.
I am still in denial at this point. I want to believe that he still cares and thinks about me once in a while to make me feel better. I am so pathetic..I still think about him every minute of the day and I wish he will call me one last time so I can tell him I didn't really care about him that much (of course, it's a lie because I still miss him). I probably need someone to wake me up from being stupid.

texy · 02-07-2006, 08:55 AM

If you really want to make him wonder, do not contact him in any way. The lack of contact on your part, plus all the wonderful strides you make on your new diet FOR YOURSELF, will hurt his pride and cause him to wonder. Just focus on yourself, exercise, eat right, experiment with hair and makeup, or things around the house. When the day comes that you do run into him on the street looking all fab, you won't care.

lisamoran · 02-07-2006, 08:55 AM

You are not pathetic! A person that would use someone like that so-called man did is pathetic, dispicable and down right horrible. You are a better person who will find happiness.

Take care.

TCsBears · 02-07-2006, 11:19 AM

Take up the punching bag, kick boxing, etc. it will relieve your frustrations, be great cardio and exercise and while your worknig at it, you won't be eating, just losing weight and better yourself. Don't lower yourself to his level, you can do this.

HUGS

tc

sexyfatchick · 02-07-2006, 04:57 PM

You need to look at this as he did you a SERIOUS favor.

Feel better.

SFC

Barbara690 · 02-07-2006, 05:33 PM

He's married!!!!!!What a low life piece of sh*#%!Makes me want to go over and kick him for you!He's not a man he's slime!

Well,I pity his wife and the life she has ahead of her.You are so much better off and be glad that he is out of your life.Good riddance to bad rubbish.

KQT · 02-07-2006, 05:36 PM

i am so sorry to hear you going through this. but everything that texy said, DO! don't contact him, just let him go. he's not worth your time, and he's not worth your tears. what i do whenever i am angry at someone is type them a letter... i don't send it, i just type it up in my ongoing word document journal and save it. of course i password secured it so nobody can read it, if it fell into the wrong hands i would die of embarassment! but i'm telling you, just type out everything you'd like to say to him and then save it... and then be done with him. he is more fuel to the fire that you will lose this weight and look better and feel better than ever! it's frustrating when the other is involved in a marriage, believe me i've accidently found myself in that situation! but just remember the kind of guy he turned out to be (apparently married and a jackass!) and don't look back.

and remember we are here for you!

Barbara690 · 02-07-2006, 05:44 PM

Sorry for my outburst but I have dealt with so called "men" like that in my past and I get a little heated when I hear about it.
You will find a real man someday that will treat you right.A real man will be able to see what a special person you are and thank his lucky stars that you are in his life!You deserve it.

aprilfool2 · 02-08-2006, 07:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Barbara690

He's married!!!!!!What a low life piece of sh*#%!Makes me want to go over and kick him for you!He's not a man he's slime!

Well,I pity his wife and the life she has ahead of her.You are so much better off and be glad that he is out of your life.Good riddance to bad rubbish.

Yes, he's married! I died inside when I found out.

How I found out is through the background reports you request on the internet. I had to pay $14.95 but it was worth it. I should have checked his background before I trusted him. Learning my lesson the hard way!

Next time, before I trust someone, I will not think twice spending another $14.95 just to check.

aprilfool2 · 02-08-2006, 07:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by texy

If you really want to make him wonder, do not contact him in any way.

Texy, I really like your advice not to contact him to make him wonder.
Honestly, I wanted to talk to him one last time, but I chose to follow your advice.
Thanks!

aprilfool2 · 02-08-2006, 07:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by krissy7602

i am so sorry to hear you going through this. but everything that texy said, DO! don't contact him, just let him go. he's not worth your time, and he's not worth your tears. what i do whenever i am angry at someone is type them a letter... i don't send it, i just type it up in my ongoing word document journal and save it. of course i password secured it so nobody can read it, if it fell into the wrong hands i would die of embarassment! but i'm telling you, just type out everything you'd like to say to him and then save it... and then be done with him. he is more fuel to the fire that you will lose this weight and look better and feel better than ever! it's frustrating when the other is involved in a marriage, believe me i've accidently found myself in that situation! but just remember the kind of guy he turned out to be (apparently married and a jackass!) and don't look back.

and remember we are here for you!

Krissy, thanks for the advice. I was just reading an article about typing a letter and not sending it, just to vent out. I think I will try that. Maybe after I have written that letter, I will stop thinking about him ( I still do and still have feelings for him inspite of what he had done). I am trying my best to move on...it's not easy.

texy · 02-08-2006, 12:23 PM

You'll do great. Use all your emotion to propel you in your way of eating exercise. I went through something similar once, so I completely understand. I can tell you with complete confidence that you will get through it, and be better for it. (and it will drive him nuts!)

Cookie41 · 02-14-2006, 10:21 PM

One thing that has helped me is to put away all the things he gave me in the attic it made my house seem more fresh and it has helped me not think about him.

I wanted to hire a truck to dump the stuff in his front yard and leave a sign to give this trash to his new sweetie

but then I thought hmmm I can sell all this stuff and get a lot of money and take a trip or buy new clothes!

I wish the Best for You!

JanMarie3 · 02-22-2006, 02:54 PM

My live in bf of three years dumped me for another women........all in the past now.

But, I was devastated........I didn't eat or drink anything for weeks and I ended up on Paxil for depressiion and anxiety.

I would write that letter to him, let it all out and give him hell, but don't mail it.

Then get rid of everything he ever gave you, all the pictures, cards etc....if you can't bear to throw them out now, give them to a friend to store for you.

I even had a ceremony with my sister, where I burned some of his stuff, for closure.

I pity his poor wife too.................

02-05-2006, 08:01 PM	#1
aprilfool2 Junior LCF Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 13 Gallery: aprilfool2	I got dumped by BF and ruined my diet I just got dumped by BF this afternoon and I didn't know what to do. I ate all the carbs I could see to make me feel better. I totally ruined my first week of induction. I am having chest pains right now and I want to cry but no tears are coming out. It feels like the world fell on me. Please help on how to cope. This is the first time I got dumped, normally I am the one who dumps my ex-BFs.

02-06-2006, 01:45 AM	#4
Cookie41 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Arizona Posts: 1,341 Gallery: Cookie41 WOE: Atkins Start Date: 1/14/06	I am so sorry..but at least he told you in a strange way..mine left me and diddent tell me I got worried because I had not heard from him in a month and called his house another woman answered and said she was living there! I almost fainted!! I was with him for four years I trusted him and believe him when he said I love you ..I still don't know how to deal with it but im trying...It does help to go shopping, movies is not a good thing for me to do we went to a lot of movies, it helps to do things that you did not do together and make new memories. I wish you the Best! I am trying one day at a time. This happend to me on 1/1/06 __________________ MySpace Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground. #1.Never trust a dog to watch your food. #2.Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time. #3.Never ask a 2 year old to hold an egg.

02-22-2006, 02:54 PM	#28
JanMarie3 Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Under the Gateway Arch Posts: 3,586 Gallery: JanMarie3 Stats: 140/134/125 5'3" WOE: Atkins Start Date: Registered: August 2000	My live in bf of three years dumped me for another women........all in the past now. But, I was devastated........I didn't eat or drink anything for weeks and I ended up on Paxil for depressiion and anxiety. I would write that letter to him, let it all out and give him hell, but don't mail it. Then get rid of everything he ever gave you, all the pictures, cards etc....if you can't bear to throw them out now, give them to a friend to store for you. I even had a ceremony with my sister, where I burned some of his stuff, for closure. I pity his poor wife too................. __________________ Jan

02-05-2006, 10:00 PM	#2
sillykimmie MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: The Evergreen state Posts: 1,420 Gallery: sillykimmie WOE: soon to be parking it on the south beach..	April2, I am so sorry that this happened to you!! I have been there, as many have but that doesn't make it any easier... I am a new poster but have been a long time lurker, stay with these boards and post often. There is so much support here, with people who care. Drop back often, I will listen so will many... blessings to you, kim h.

02-06-2006, 08:49 AM	#8
RobinB Heart Writer Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Maryland Posts: 2,170 Gallery: RobinB WOE: Atkins Start Date: restart March '07	Envision yourself thin and running into him at the mall a year from now (or where ever) and think how sorry he will be because you will be HOT!!!!

02-06-2006, 10:26 AM	#9
Barbara690 Senior LCF Member Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: southern Colorado Posts: 771 Gallery: Barbara690 WOE: Atkins Start Date: Oct,2003 this time around	Looking good is the best revenge......the upside to that is that you will feel better and be healthier.Remember you can change how you look on the outside but he will always be the jerk on the inside.

02-06-2006, 10:45 AM	#10
aprilfool2 Junior LCF Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 13 Gallery: aprilfool2	Thanks for all the support. I just found out that my ex-BF is married and I have now confirmed my fear that he just used me to help him on his work project. How painful! I don't know how I can cope with this.....

02-06-2006, 11:27 AM	#11
Saracat MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 1,105 Gallery: Saracat Stats: 160-116-125 WOE: Atkins Start Date: April 2005	You will cope with this by knowing you are the better person. He is the slime, you are NOT.Get back on track and let yourself be the beautiful person you know you are. Thank goodness this is ended! Would you have wanted to continue to be duped? Now you are free to make a new beginning. This is a good thing! You deserve better and you are going to get it. Pity his poor wife. What a jerk!

02-06-2006, 12:31 PM	#12
kstmommy Senior LCF Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Northern IN Posts: 65 Gallery: kstmommy Stats: 160/160/135 WOE: Kimmer's Exp./Kimmers Start Date: 11/13/06	Sara is exactly right. What an ass. You'll be so much better off and can start a new life.

02-07-2006, 02:00 AM	#13
Cookie41 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Arizona Posts: 1,341 Gallery: Cookie41 WOE: Atkins Start Date: 1/14/06	I tried to call him at his office but he never would answer so I just quit calling I don't want him to think I am hurt he would just love that. The first two weeks were unbareable I couldnt sleep or eat but all the time I told myself over and over agian That I am Someone Special! And He Will Not Rule My Life! I was happy before he came into my life a little lonley but happy and I will get back to being happy! Joining this message board has save my life I read and post and it takes my mind off thinking about him Thanks All You have all your Pride he is the one that does not! I believe that when one door is closed in are case slammed in the face there is another one much much better waiting for me to open! Im a good person and so are you and I think we deserve Better!!

02-07-2006, 08:55 AM	#16
texy Senior LCF Member Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Texas Posts: 207 Gallery: texy Stats: 171.5/164/135 Start Date: 08/01/03	If you really want to make him wonder, do not contact him in any way. The lack of contact on your part, plus all the wonderful strides you make on your new diet FOR YOURSELF, will hurt his pride and cause him to wonder. Just focus on yourself, exercise, eat right, experiment with hair and makeup, or things around the house. When the day comes that you do run into him on the street looking all fab, you won't care.

02-07-2006, 08:55 AM	#17
lisamoran Senior LCF Member Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Staten Island, NY Posts: 999 Gallery: lisamoran Stats: 188/176:(/150 first goal WOE: WW... for now Start Date: Feb. 06	You are not pathetic! A person that would use someone like that so-called man did is pathetic, dispicable and down right horrible. You are a better person who will find happiness. Take care.

02-07-2006, 11:19 AM	#18
TCsBears MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Louisville, KY Posts: 2,276 Gallery: TCsBears Stats: 234.5/restart 212/150-130?	Take up the punching bag, kick boxing, etc. it will relieve your frustrations, be great cardio and exercise and while your worknig at it, you won't be eating, just losing weight and better yourself. Don't lower yourself to his level, you can do this. HUGS tc

02-07-2006, 04:57 PM	#19
sexyfatchick Senior LCF Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: On the coast in California Posts: 262 Gallery: sexyfatchick Stats: 235/163.5/130; 5'8"; WOE: Lean for Life Start Date: January 16, 2006	You need to look at this as he did you a SERIOUS favor. Feel better. SFC

02-07-2006, 05:33 PM	#20
Barbara690 Senior LCF Member Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: southern Colorado Posts: 771 Gallery: Barbara690 WOE: Atkins Start Date: Oct,2003 this time around	He's married!!!!!!What a low life piece of sh*#%!Makes me want to go over and kick him for you!He's not a man he's slime! Well,I pity his wife and the life she has ahead of her.You are so much better off and be glad that he is out of your life.Good riddance to bad rubbish.

02-07-2006, 05:36 PM	#21
KQT Blabbermouth!!! Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 6,368 Gallery: KQT WOE: get in mah belly! Start Date: 2/6/06	i am so sorry to hear you going through this. but everything that texy said, DO! don't contact him, just let him go. he's not worth your time, and he's not worth your tears. what i do whenever i am angry at someone is type them a letter... i don't send it, i just type it up in my ongoing word document journal and save it. of course i password secured it so nobody can read it, if it fell into the wrong hands i would die of embarassment! but i'm telling you, just type out everything you'd like to say to him and then save it... and then be done with him. he is more fuel to the fire that you will lose this weight and look better and feel better than ever! it's frustrating when the other is involved in a marriage, believe me i've accidently found myself in that situation! but just remember the kind of guy he turned out to be (apparently married and a jackass!) and don't look back. and remember we are here for you!

02-07-2006, 05:44 PM	#22
Barbara690 Senior LCF Member Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: southern Colorado Posts: 771 Gallery: Barbara690 WOE: Atkins Start Date: Oct,2003 this time around	Sorry for my outburst but I have dealt with so called "men" like that in my past and I get a little heated when I hear about it. You will find a real man someday that will treat you right.A real man will be able to see what a special person you are and thank his lucky stars that you are in his life!You deserve it.

02-08-2006, 12:23 PM	#26
texy Senior LCF Member Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Texas Posts: 207 Gallery: texy Stats: 171.5/164/135 Start Date: 08/01/03	You'll do great. Use all your emotion to propel you in your way of eating exercise. I went through something similar once, so I completely understand. I can tell you with complete confidence that you will get through it, and be better for it. (and it will drive him nuts!)

02-14-2006, 10:21 PM	#27
Cookie41 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Arizona Posts: 1,341 Gallery: Cookie41 WOE: Atkins Start Date: 1/14/06	One thing that has helped me is to put away all the things he gave me in the attic it made my house seem more fresh and it has helped me not think about him. I wanted to hire a truck to dump the stuff in his front yard and leave a sign to give this trash to his new sweetie but then I thought hmmm I can sell all this stuff and get a lot of money and take a trip or buy new clothes! I wish the Best for You!