My heart is breaking!

Ladyhawke · 12-13-2005, 11:00 PM

I've just spent 10 days visiting my daughter in Melbourne. We had a lovely time together but when I got home I checked my emails and found that she doesnt want to see or speak to me anymore. I am totally dumbfounded and so is my husband. She doesn't give me any reasons only that her decision is final!!!! I feel so flat and doing my BFL exercises today was a big struggle and I feel tired all the time. Thank God I have Him in my life because I do not know what I would do without Him. I feel as if my daughter as died and I am in morning. I am at a loss at the moment....love Ladyhawke

Leashy · 12-13-2005, 11:04 PM

I am so sorry for what you're going through. Talk about a smack in the face. I'm also sorry that I have no advice for you.

Okira · 12-14-2005, 06:38 AM

Wow. That's really awful. Something must have triggered this and she certainly owes you an explanation. I'm so sorry. Please know I will be praying for this relationship to be healed.
Peace,
Okira

brilliant100 · 12-14-2005, 07:19 AM

That is horrible!!!

Maybe another family memeber can talk to her and find out wha the deal is.

heidi21062 · 12-14-2005, 07:51 AM

USMCmom · 12-15-2005, 11:58 AM

I am so sorry to hear that.

Have you and your daughter had problems in the past that my have triggered this? I would reply to her email and tell her how hurt you are and you feel like you at least deserve an explanation. She may or may not respond but at least you tried. I really hope she has a change of heart.

zay · 12-15-2005, 03:54 PM

Wow, this is sad. I'm so sorry you are hurting. You're right, HE will always be there for you. Ask HIM for peace and patience until she is willing to work it out. It is odd that you have no idea what this about.

srm · 12-15-2005, 07:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ladyhawke

I've just spent 10 days visiting my daughter in Melbourne. We had a lovely time together but when I got home I checked my emails and found that she doesnt want to see or speak to me anymore. I am totally dumbfounded and so is my husband. She doesn't give me any reasons only that her decision is final!!!! I feel so flat and doing my BFL exercises today was a big struggle and I feel tired all the time. Thank God I have Him in my life because I do not know what I would do without Him. I feel as if my daughter as died and I am in morning. I am at a loss at the moment....love Ladyhawke

My 2 cents...

attempt to talk to her. If it is impossible. tell that is her decision...that you still love her and that your door is always open to her.

If it were me I would still send her a birthday and Christmas card each year and...other than that leave her alone.

Bubbles · 12-16-2005, 09:00 AM

You did not say how old your DD was but if she is young she is probably a big drama queen. Did she ask to borrow money or any other thing that may have set her off?

muffles · 12-16-2005, 12:35 PM

I've been through similar stuff with my mum. Best thing is to give her some space to calm down. maybe send her a vard or letter saying that you will respect her decision but anytime she wants to talk to you , you'll be willing. Try not to worry about this, just trust that eventually she will come back to you. SOmetimes daughters just need time to sort things out - without mum.

Ladyhawke · 12-16-2005, 07:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Okira

Wow. That's really awful. Something must have triggered this and she certainly owes you an explanation. I'm so sorry. Please know I will be praying for this relationship to be healed.
Peace,
Okira

Dear Okira, Thank you for your prayers. I have the Pastor of my church praying plus other members of my church. Thank God that I have Him in my life!!! We do have an awesome God don't we.
Love & Peace to you....Ladyhawke

Ladyhawke · 12-16-2005, 07:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leashy

I am so sorry for what you're going through. Talk about a smack in the face. I'm also sorry that I have no advice for you.

Dear Leashy,

Thank you for acknowledging my plea....Love Ladyhawke

Ladyhawke · 12-16-2005, 07:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brilliant100

That is horrible!!!

Maybe another family memeber can talk to her and find out wha the deal is.

Dear Brilliant 100,
She told me not to get my sister or her nanna to talk to her! So that's it!

I do not know what has triggered this off!

I just don't understand it!

I spoke to my sister the other night who lives only 4 doors down from her and she said she doesn't know anything other than my daughter told her she wasn't speaking to me.

I will just keep praying about it!

Love....Ladyhawke

catkan · 12-16-2005, 07:54 PM

My DD said pretty much those same words to me about 3 yrs ago. Turns out it was her BF controlling her and making her say those things.

There is a lot of good advice on this thread for you. The main thing to hang on to is that this is not a forever thing between you and your DD. She will come around back to you.

My DD and I are very close now, she had to work things out and see what a controlling snake he was.... and to my satisfaction he ended up in prison!!!

I know you won't stop worrying and feeling bad, but take care of yourself.

Ladyhawke · 12-16-2005, 07:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lcforlife

I am so sorry to hear that.

Have you and your daughter had problems in the past that my have triggered this? I would reply to her email and tell her how hurt you are and you feel like you at least deserve an explanation. She may or may not respond but at least you tried. I really hope she has a change of heart.

Dear lcforlife,
Yes, we have had problems in the past...But that was a very long time ago. Forthe past 12 years we have been trying to get to know one another. I did reply to her email and asked her why this and why that and to give me instances of actual things I have done wrong, but she doesn't want to do that. I feel I deserve an explanation. I will just keep praying for whatever has triggered it off to heal.
Love Ladyhawke...

Ladyhawke · 12-16-2005, 08:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zay

Wow, this is sad. I'm so sorry you are hurting. You're right, HE will always be there for you. Ask HIM for peace and patience until she is willing to work it out. It is odd that you have no idea what this about.

Dear Zay, Yes it is very sad. I have been doing all of the above and I have a lot of people praying for me.
The Pastor of my church has seen all the emails mine and hers. He said it was a dreadful letter but my reply was very good.
All we can do is pray.....love Ladyhawke

Ladyhawke · 12-16-2005, 08:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by srm

My 2 cents...

attempt to talk to her. If it is impossible. tell that is her decision...that you still love her and that your door is always open to her.

If it were me I would still send her a birthday and Christmas card each year and...other than that leave her alone.

Dear srm,
I have replied to her email. I will send her another email to tell her that I love her and that my door will always be open to her. And, I had planned to still send birthday cards, presents, christmas etc etc to everyone in the family.

Thanks again, love Ladyhawke....

Valentine Baby · 12-17-2005, 01:31 PM

oh, This makes me so sad to read this. I can really feel your pain as I have a son that I haven't seen in 4 yrs. He doesn't want anything to do with me. I love him so much and I think about him everyday. I call him at least once a month and it kills me to hear in his voice that he's not interested. Our conversations never last more that a couple of mins because he's always got something better to do. He never calls, writes, or visits me. I still keep in touch even tho he'd rather not because one day he might change his mind and want a relationship with me. I never force myself on him. When I call him I usually tell him that I wanted to touch base with him to see how he's doing and I tell him I miss and love him and that's about it for our conversation.

I know how hard this is for you.

Valentine Baby · 12-17-2005, 01:32 PM

I also forgot to mention that to keep in touch do send those Christmas cards & B-day cards.

gettingstrength · 12-19-2005, 06:58 PM

Slim34 · 12-21-2005, 08:57 AM

That is terrible. She needs to give you a reason WHY? That is selfish on her part. So sorry.

Ladyhawke · 12-22-2005, 11:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by valentine21463

oh, This makes me so sad to read this. I can really feel your pain as I have a son that I haven't seen in 4 yrs. He doesn't want anything to do with me. I love him so much and I think about him everyday. I call him at least once a month and it kills me to hear in his voice that he's not interested. Our conversations never last more that a couple of mins because he's always got something better to do. He never calls, writes, or visits me. I still keep in touch even tho he'd rather not because one day he might change his mind and want a relationship with me. I never force myself on him. When I call him I usually tell him that I wanted to touch base with him to see how he's doing and I tell him I miss and love him and that's about it for our conversation.

I know how hard this is for you.

Thanks for your understanding....Love Ladyhawke

cookiemonsterlover04 · 12-30-2005, 12:10 PM

I'm so sorry to hear this...but I wanted to let you know that I have done the same thing as your daughter is doing to you to my mom. Mine was b.c of my ex bf he didn't want me to have a lot to do with her. My mom was devastated. I'm sorry that you are going thru this. I know that she will realize soon that this is not right....I'll pray for you!

Jenbo · 01-08-2006, 05:53 PM

Does your dd have the same christian beliefs as you do?

12-13-2005, 11:00 PM	#1
Ladyhawke Junior LCF Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: I live in Kinross, Western Australia Posts: 32 Gallery: Ladyhawke Stats: 291.28/248.6/125.4 WOE: Atkins/BFL + BFFM Start Date: January 2004	My heart is breaking! I've just spent 10 days visiting my daughter in Melbourne. We had a lovely time together but when I got home I checked my emails and found that she doesnt want to see or speak to me anymore. I am totally dumbfounded and so is my husband. She doesn't give me any reasons only that her decision is final!!!! I feel so flat and doing my BFL exercises today was a big struggle and I feel tired all the time. Thank God I have Him in my life because I do not know what I would do without Him. I feel as if my daughter as died and I am in morning. I am at a loss at the moment....love Ladyhawke

12-17-2005, 01:31 PM	#18
Valentine Baby MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: WI Posts: 2,386 Gallery: Valentine Baby Stats: 190/190/130ish - 5'4" 45 yrs. HW 210 lbs. WOE: LC my way Start Date: 11/18/2005 restarting 05/11/08	oh, This makes me so sad to read this. I can really feel your pain as I have a son that I haven't seen in 4 yrs. He doesn't want anything to do with me. I love him so much and I think about him everyday. I call him at least once a month and it kills me to hear in his voice that he's not interested. Our conversations never last more that a couple of mins because he's always got something better to do. He never calls, writes, or visits me. I still keep in touch even tho he'd rather not because one day he might change his mind and want a relationship with me. I never force myself on him. When I call him I usually tell him that I wanted to touch base with him to see how he's doing and I tell him I miss and love him and that's about it for our conversation. I know how hard this is for you. __________________ Smoke Free since: 12/1/05 Restart:5/11/08 190/190/135ish 190, , 180, 175, (170/10%), 165, 160, 155, 150, 145, 140, 135 130! http://www.lowcarbfriends.com/bbs/we...s-aka-val.html http://www.myspace.com/dreams63

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12-13-2005, 11:04 PM	#2
Leashy Big Yapper!!!! Join Date: Oct 2005 Posts: 9,030 Gallery: Leashy Stats: 319/264/150 WOE: Portion Control Start Date: June '08	I am so sorry for what you're going through. Talk about a smack in the face. I'm also sorry that I have no advice for you.

12-14-2005, 06:38 AM	#3
Okira MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Southeast Posts: 1,229 Gallery: Okira Stats: 223/181/150 WOE: Atkins Start Date: August, 2005	Wow. That's really awful. Something must have triggered this and she certainly owes you an explanation. I'm so sorry. Please know I will be praying for this relationship to be healed. Peace, Okira

12-14-2005, 07:19 AM	#4
brilliant100 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Western, USA Posts: 2,444 Gallery: brilliant100 Stats: 266/194/169 WOE: Atkins/M&E Feast, Lower fat & Lower calorie Start Date: restarted 6/1/05 M/E, back on the wagon 8-21-07	That is horrible!!! Maybe another family memeber can talk to her and find out wha the deal is.

12-14-2005, 07:51 AM	#5
heidi21062 Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Transplanted to NC...but my hearts in Hampton, VA.... Posts: 14,573 Gallery: heidi21062 Stats: 190/176/110 - 5'3" WOE: Atkins..no WW's...wait a minute....what day is it? Start Date: Started WW 07/28/08 @ 178.6 lbs

12-15-2005, 11:58 AM	#6
USMCmom Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Texas Posts: 3,149 Gallery: USMCmom Stats: size 14/10/8 WOE: stop eating so much Start Date: 2/2003	I am so sorry to hear that. Have you and your daughter had problems in the past that my have triggered this? I would reply to her email and tell her how hurt you are and you feel like you at least deserve an explanation. She may or may not respond but at least you tried. I really hope she has a change of heart.

12-15-2005, 03:54 PM	#7
zay Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 3,243 Gallery: zay	Wow, this is sad. I'm so sorry you are hurting. You're right, HE will always be there for you. Ask HIM for peace and patience until she is willing to work it out. It is odd that you have no idea what this about.

12-16-2005, 09:00 AM	#9
Bubbles Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Live Free or Die Baby!!!!! Posts: 10,100 Gallery: Bubbles Stats: 140 lbs of flabby fun WOE: All the time Start Date: Feb 2003	You did not say how old your DD was but if she is young she is probably a big drama queen. Did she ask to borrow money or any other thing that may have set her off?

12-16-2005, 12:35 PM	#10
muffles Senior LCF Member Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: New Zealand Posts: 196 Gallery: muffles Stats: 112kg/93/75kg WOE: Atkins Start Date: december 26th	I've been through similar stuff with my mum. Best thing is to give her some space to calm down. maybe send her a vard or letter saying that you will respect her decision but anytime she wants to talk to you , you'll be willing. Try not to worry about this, just trust that eventually she will come back to you. SOmetimes daughters just need time to sort things out - without mum.

12-16-2005, 07:54 PM	#14
catkan Senior LCF Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Posts: 804 Gallery: catkan WOE: mod carbs	My DD said pretty much those same words to me about 3 yrs ago. Turns out it was her BF controlling her and making her say those things. There is a lot of good advice on this thread for you. The main thing to hang on to is that this is not a forever thing between you and your DD. She will come around back to you. My DD and I are very close now, she had to work things out and see what a controlling snake he was.... and to my satisfaction he ended up in prison!!! I know you won't stop worrying and feeling bad, but take care of yourself.

12-17-2005, 01:32 PM	#19
Valentine Baby MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: WI Posts: 2,386 Gallery: Valentine Baby Stats: 190/190/130ish - 5'4" 45 yrs. HW 210 lbs. WOE: LC my way Start Date: 11/18/2005 restarting 05/11/08	I also forgot to mention that to keep in touch do send those Christmas cards & B-day cards.

12-19-2005, 06:58 PM	#20
gettingstrength Big Yapper!!!! Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Tennessee Posts: 9,523 Gallery: gettingstrength Stats: 184 / 170 / ? WOE: atkins Start Date: 6 / 1 / 2002

12-21-2005, 08:57 AM	#21
Slim34 Junior LCF Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Illinois Posts: 57 Gallery: Slim34	That is terrible. She needs to give you a reason WHY? That is selfish on her part. So sorry.

12-30-2005, 12:10 PM	#23
cookiemonsterlover04 Junior LCF Member Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 7 Gallery: cookiemonsterlover04 Stats: 169/159.4/119 WOE: atkins Start Date: 1/1/06	I'm so sorry to hear this...but I wanted to let you know that I have done the same thing as your daughter is doing to you to my mom. Mine was b.c of my ex bf he didn't want me to have a lot to do with her. My mom was devastated. I'm sorry that you are going thru this. I know that she will realize soon that this is not right....I'll pray for you!

01-08-2006, 05:53 PM	#24
Jenbo Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: BrisVegas Posts: 20,627 Gallery: Jenbo	Does your dd have the same christian beliefs as you do?