Why can't I be happy with my body?

landis · 05-17-2005, 12:33 PM

Why do I always either think I am too fat (mostly) or be afraid I am becoming too thin. I know I am a good weight because people tell me that but I am constantly unhappy about how I look. I exercise so it is not that. I am thinking it comes from years of comments about my mother's looks (about herself). She is in her 80s now and still talks about how "awful" she looks at a normal weight. I hope I can someday get over it. It is an awful obsession.

AriAnne · 05-17-2005, 11:50 PM

I think it is about self worth more than looks. Looks is a easy point of
contact to blame, but self worth is where the core of it is, imo.

Matt · 05-18-2005, 01:58 AM

i feel the same way, i know ill pretty much never be completely satisfied with my body no matter how much i weigh/exercise. Ive just come to accept the fact that some people just cant achieve perfect bodies no matter what.

djalomo · 05-18-2005, 10:20 AM

I'm also the same way. I used to tell myself if I ever weighed below 120 or could wear a size 4 I'd be happy and that's that. Ha! I *am* happy with my loss, but now I feel like I'm still such a LONG way from having a body that I'll be happy with. It feels unattainable. I hate my body's shape, its "jigglyness", etc.

And I've begun to REALLY scrutinize other things, like my smile. I've never really in my life had huge issues with it, but since i've lost some weight I've become *obsessed* with getting braces and bleaching.

I'm also a compulsive shopper. And it's less about shopping and clothes than it is about finding clothes that "camoflage" my flaws.

It's weird...I don't think I'm really unattractive...I just don't think I'm, like, ever going to be "beautiful" to the opposite sex. That's so messed up.

MindyK · 06-12-2005, 06:14 PM

OMG - I am so much like this. I have been up and down the scale... when I lost quite a bit, I thought I had learned to be happy at the weight I was at even though I wasn't yet at goal... now that I have gained some back, I HATE myself and what I look like - even though a year or so ago, I was THRILLED to get to the same weight.

Meowser · 06-12-2005, 09:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by djalomo

I'm also the same way. I used to tell myself if I ever weighed below 120 or could wear a size 4 I'd be happy and that's that. Ha! I *am* happy with my loss, but now I feel like I'm still such a LONG way from having a body that I'll be happy with. It feels unattainable. I hate my body's shape, its "jigglyness", etc.

And I've begun to REALLY scrutinize other things, like my smile. I've never really in my life had huge issues with it, but since i've lost some weight I've become *obsessed* with getting braces and bleaching.

I'm also a compulsive shopper. And it's less about shopping and clothes than it is about finding clothes that "camoflage" my flaws.

It's weird...I don't think I'm really unattractive...I just don't think I'm, like, ever going to be "beautiful" to the opposite sex. That's so messed up.

I could have written that exact same thing. Except for the complusove shopping. I find it easier to wear jeans and baggy t-shirts. I just don't understand how I can feel this way. And, like you said, now I'm concerned about other things.

I wish I could feel good. It might be a self worth issue. I wish I knew how to feel good about myself. How about if one of us finds the secret, we share it with each other?

MindyK · 06-13-2005, 06:41 AM

I also understand that part. My husband probably hasn't touched me 5 times since we were married in August 2004. I've only gained 10 lbs since we married, so logically that is probably not the issue, but I really do feel so unattractive when he has no desire for me. I have asked him so many times if I've done something wrong... but he would just rather drink...

05-17-2005, 12:33 PM	#1
landis Boss of Me Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: In the shelter of His arms Posts: 31,801 Gallery: landis Stats: Not where I'd like to be..yet. WOE: God's Start Date: Jan 2004	Why can't I be happy with my body? Why do I always either think I am too fat (mostly) or be afraid I am becoming too thin. I know I am a good weight because people tell me that but I am constantly unhappy about how I look. I exercise so it is not that. I am thinking it comes from years of comments about my mother's looks (about herself). She is in her 80s now and still talks about how "awful" she looks at a normal weight. I hope I can someday get over it. It is an awful obsession.

05-18-2005, 10:20 AM	#4
djalomo Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Aug 2004 Posts: 13,769 Gallery: djalomo Stats: 132/ getting there! /110 WOE: Atkins Start Date: August 2004	I'm also the same way. I used to tell myself if I ever weighed below 120 or could wear a size 4 I'd be happy and that's that. Ha! I am happy with my loss, but now I feel like I'm still such a LONG way from having a body that I'll be happy with. It feels unattainable. I hate my body's shape, its "jigglyness", etc. And I've begun to REALLY scrutinize other things, like my smile. I've never really in my life had huge issues with it, but since i've lost some weight I've become obsessed with getting braces and bleaching. I'm also a compulsive shopper. And it's less about shopping and clothes than it is about finding clothes that "camoflage" my flaws. It's weird...I don't think I'm really unattractive...I just don't think I'm, like, ever going to be "beautiful" to the opposite sex. That's so messed up. __________________ boo.

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05-17-2005, 11:50 PM	#2
AriAnne Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Jun 2002 Posts: 10,574 Gallery: AriAnne	I think it is about self worth more than looks. Looks is a easy point of contact to blame, but self worth is where the core of it is, imo.

05-18-2005, 01:58 AM	#3
Matt Resident Trans Fat Expert Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Atlanta GA Posts: 5,177 Gallery: Matt Stats: 370/200/170 WOE: Low GI / south beach type diet Start Date: Low GI Started: 4-05	i feel the same way, i know ill pretty much never be completely satisfied with my body no matter how much i weigh/exercise. Ive just come to accept the fact that some people just cant achieve perfect bodies no matter what.

06-12-2005, 06:14 PM	#5
MindyK MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Cape Girardeau, MO Posts: 1,212 Gallery: MindyK Stats: 200/137.5/130 WOE: All Sorts of LC	OMG - I am so much like this. I have been up and down the scale... when I lost quite a bit, I thought I had learned to be happy at the weight I was at even though I wasn't yet at goal... now that I have gained some back, I HATE myself and what I look like - even though a year or so ago, I was THRILLED to get to the same weight.

06-13-2005, 06:41 AM	#7
MindyK MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Cape Girardeau, MO Posts: 1,212 Gallery: MindyK Stats: 200/137.5/130 WOE: All Sorts of LC	I also understand that part. My husband probably hasn't touched me 5 times since we were married in August 2004. I've only gained 10 lbs since we married, so logically that is probably not the issue, but I really do feel so unattractive when he has no desire for me. I have asked him so many times if I've done something wrong... but he would just rather drink...