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Old 03-03-2014, 01:52 PM   #1
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What was the final straw?

I'm curious to know what was the final straw (event or situation) that made you start your weight loss journey?

I personally have two:

1. Intimacy with the DH had gotten quite disappointing and uncomfortable. We had both gained weight (me mostly) and we just don't "fit together" well anymore!

2. I grew up blessedly thin. My younger sister grew up chubby. We were best friends though, as we were so close in age. I hit my 20's, where family DNA and learned eating habits kicked in. In about 10 years I gained over 100 lbs. My sister also gained more than that. We went on a girls cruise (with some other women who are also struggling with their weight). Alcohol imbued conversation had my sister tell me something very cruel. She hated me growing up because I was thin. And now that I'm fat too, she's happy about it! This hurt a lot and made me very very angry at her petty jealousy! But it also sparked a serious sense of competition to show her up. I CAN lose this weight, and won't allow my unhappiness with myself validate her feelings about her weight. To this day, instead of actually doing something about her health, she puts down fit/thin people, and glorifies the morbidly obese (i hate that term) figure.

So anyway, I'm curious to know what was your initial spark to get going on your journey to good health??
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Old 03-03-2014, 02:48 PM   #2
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I developed osteoarthritis in right knee and left hip. The knee responded to physical therapy but the hip got worse. This past August, at 56, I had a total hip replacement. Developed an infection - MRSA - and in October had to have the hardware removed and a ceramic anti-biotic spacer put in. Spent 6 weeks in rehab in a wheelchair. On April 8, I go back in and have new hardware installed, and hopefully this time around things will go better.

Thru all this I realized that if I don't lose the weight, I will need to have the knee done and I just do not want to go thru surgery again.
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Old 03-04-2014, 09:10 AM   #3
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Hi Joanne!

Do you find that the need to lose was more motivating because it was for medical reasons? I sometimes wonder if I would have been more motivated to start earlier and not let myself go as far as I did had it been for medical need. (I do consider myself extremely fortunate though not to have the variety of problems that could have developed).

I wish you the best of luck in your healing process!
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Old 03-04-2014, 11:00 AM   #4
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Seeing myself in photos finally pushed me out of deep deep denial.

Don't take this as criticism, as I really do mean it sincerely, but could you maybe support not compete with your sister. As a person with a sister, I understand some of the dynamics, but it may be that she needs love and acceptance right now more than competition. Oh gawd, that comes off preachy, but as I said I am just raising the question. I do compete, but I generally feel better with myself when I don't. It's can be a scary world out there . . . . at some point you sister may be ready for change and you can be there for her. Denial for me was mostly self protection and pain avoidance. It's hard for me to accept help from others. Blessings to you, Sexy.
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Old 03-04-2014, 12:04 PM   #5
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Intimacy with husband is a big one. Hard to be intimate when you don't feel good about yourself.
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Old 03-04-2014, 12:31 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Patience View Post
Seeing myself in photos finally pushed me out of deep deep denial.

Don't take this as criticism, as I really do mean it sincerely, but could you maybe support not compete with your sister. As a person with a sister, I understand some of the dynamics, but it may be that she needs love and acceptance right now more than competition. Oh gawd, that comes off preachy, but as I said I am just raising the question. I do compete, but I generally feel better with myself when I don't. It's can be a scary world out there . . . . at some point you sister may be ready for change and you can be there for her. Denial for me was mostly self protection and pain avoidance. It's hard for me to accept help from others. Blessings to you, Sexy.
It doesn't come off as preachy at all! I appreciate the advice for sure. Re-reading what I wrote I realize I might have come across as insensitive to her own pain, which is understandable considering how she lashed out. She's the type of person you must walk on egg shells around because any disagreement with any choices she makes, or any form of constructive criticism, for her is considered a personal attack. My sense of "competition" is an internalized one, she doesn't know about it. When dealing with her, I'm hoping that my success (when it happens ) will motivate her to ask me for help to do the same. One thing she has always known is that I will offer her advice when she asks me, but won't if she doesn't.... LOL it's safer that way.
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Old 03-04-2014, 12:33 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by Madmarsha View Post
Intimacy with husband is a big one. Hard to be intimate when you don't feel good about yourself.

Very true! My DH will tell me how attracted to me he is, regardless of my weight. He doesn't quite understand that if I don't feel "sexy", it's hard for me to feel "sexy" towards him. Poor guy
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Old 03-04-2014, 12:56 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sexyback View Post
Hi Joanne!

Do you find that the need to lose was more motivating because it was for medical reasons? I sometimes wonder if I would have been more motivated to start earlier and not let myself go as far as I did had it been for medical need. (I do consider myself extremely fortunate though not to have the variety of problems that could have developed).

I wish you the best of luck in your healing process!
Thanks for your kind wish, it's much appreciated !

Re: motivation, I think so, it was pretty scary. I could have lost my leg or my life. During my time in rehab, food choice was really not much of an option, and portion was what they gave you.. and believe me, it wasn't a lot ! I ended up losing 20 pounds in those 6 weeks, and it was all due to portion control. I ate carbs, sweets, whatever was on that tray. But that's all I ate. And I was satisfied.

Once I got home, and started eating the way I used to, the weight all came back on. Which depressed me and made me eat more. Same vicious cycle I've gone thru my whole life. A friend was doing low carb and told me about this website. I decided to make up a plan to see if it would work for me based on portion control, medium carbs, and little to no processed food. So far I am pleased with my progress, husband and I have both lost some weight and we feel better.

I do find being on the forum very motivating and uplifting. Everyone on here is so positive and nonjudgmental.

Best of luck to you as well..it doesn't matter that you didn't start earlier, you started now.. everyone's motivation is different the important thing is that we're motivated and moving forward ... go us !!!
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Old 03-04-2014, 01:04 PM   #9
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Quote:
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Seeing myself in photos finally pushed me out of deep deep denial.
Ah photos... my Avatar is a good example of what I let get taken, there I am, wayyyy off in the distance, with a motorcycle hiding most of me LOL.
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Old 03-04-2014, 01:28 PM   #10
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Joints that hurt.

Having to buy clothes at Lane Giant.

Lab work that showed an A1C of 6.0 (it used to be 5.2) and total cholesterol of 204 (it used to be 179).

Feeling more dead than alive.
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Old 03-05-2014, 08:17 AM   #11
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Ah photos... my Avatar is a good example of what I let get taken, there I am, wayyyy off in the distance, with a motorcycle hiding most of me LOL.
Or me hiding behind people in pictures, the taller the better.
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Old 03-06-2014, 05:51 AM   #12
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Getting ready to have knee surgery, and while it's not a weight related issue (I have 3 cysts they are removing), the recovery is going to be tough because of my weight. Plus I have a history of blood clots, and when I had my other knee surgery (when I was 70 pounds lighter) I got a blood clot, so the goal is to be as active as possible as soon as possible, and well, I just suck at being active right now. LOL

I wanted to be down 20 pounds before surgery, and I'm half way there. Then loose another 20 during rehab. Then the last 60 when I'm feeling better and am actually able to exercise again. I LOVE cycling and was a spinner junky before I broke myself (serious snow ball effect - back, ankle, knee, etc, less exercise, more weight, more eating, less exercise.. you get the picture). I can't cycle right now because I cannot bend or straighten my leg, and I can't wait to start again!
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Old 03-06-2014, 07:09 AM   #13
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I think you have a great attitude! To relate, I found that I was always more planned and methodical about my exercise and weight loss when I had to wait to start, as opposed to impulsively jumping into doing it on a whim. Sort of like revving your engines for a bit in anticipation before you take off! Good luck with the healing!!
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Old 03-07-2014, 08:13 PM   #14
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When my thin friend offered to go down the slide with my son to show him it wasn't scary, because obviously I couldn't do it. Then my neighbors invited us to Six flaggs with them and I told my Husband I didn't think our son was old enough but really I was thinking about how one of us would have to ride the rides with him and I definitely am too big for that, might be my husband is too. I stopped going to Six FLaggs ages ago because I was too big for the adult rides, never mind the kiddie rides!

I also want to have one more child and my last pregnancy (which happened after I dropped 30lbs on atkins) was complicated by my weight and gestational diabetes...because they told me to stop Low carbing and I did, funny how quickly the diabetes popped up after that!

So basically, the last straw was me realizing how my weight would hold my kids back and how not having a healthy active Mom would impact their lives.
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Old 03-08-2014, 08:29 AM   #15
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1. I am a diabetic
2. want my three grandbabies to NOT have a fat grandma.. I want to be able to get on the floor and play with them.
3. I wanted to look better and feel better
4. I am always the one that takes the photos... never in the photos
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Old 03-08-2014, 06:33 PM   #16
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1. I want to be able to keep up with my grand daughter.
2. The scale hit the highest in my whole life.
3. I got a hernia from lifting things at work; my back is bad and used my stomach muscles. They were weak from being OVERWEIGHT (FAT!)
4. I need to have an operation to fix the hernia and don;t want to be this FAT
5. I was getting to the point that my clothes were not fitting. (size 20-22)
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Old 03-08-2014, 11:13 PM   #17
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My best friend died from a heart attack brought on by clogged arteries and half her life being overweight. Although she had a gastric band in the last year and dropped from 330 pounds to 198 pounds the damage had been done.

She was 52

My weight had creeped up and up and I don't want to leave my kids alone ...

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Old 03-09-2014, 05:39 AM   #18
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I have no idea -- if I did I could bottle and sell it. I've been a pro loser/gainer my whole entire life (since jr high). Something just "clicks" and then I do it for "real" instead of yo-yoing... This is the LAST TIME!

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Old 03-09-2014, 09:34 AM   #19
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I wish I could tell you, because for all of those in the same struggle, I'd love to be able to divine the "secret". For me, it was a "perfect storm" coming together to form the day of reckoning. THAT day had come, the day I needed to eradicate sugar, grains and start moving and realize there is no "end". You never come to the end of eating right or exercising. It's one thing knowing that, it's another to really embrace and internalize it and, I guess, believe it. I finally have. It's pretty cool.
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Old 03-15-2014, 05:24 AM   #20
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1. I had a dream and in it someone told me "you are running out of time"....

2 I was unable to walk from my car into the high school to watch my 12 year old son play in his basketball tournament due to too much pain in my left knee. I walked back to the car and said THIS IS IT!!!

3. I am prediabetic and my mother died from complications of HBP and diabetes so I decided it was in my hands to begin to control the disease process while I still can thru diet and exercise.

After #2 it was truly the day I took control over my own health doing research on knee pain solutions and gradually worked my way up to walking more normally again. Along with that I began LC eating and voila my generalized pain pretty much went away. No need for ibuprofen or other over the counter pain meds on a regular basis. It has been a year since #2. I started LC woe in sept of 2013 and I am down 50 pounds.

I have a LONG way to go but can honestly say I am on a path of recovery and have not felt this good in years.
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Old 03-15-2014, 06:24 AM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GO4IT View Post
1. I had a dream and in it someone told me "you are running out of time"....

2 I was unable to walk from my car into the high school to watch my 12 year old son play in his basketball tournament due to too much pain in my left knee. I walked back to the car and said THIS IS IT!!!

3. I am prediabetic and my mother died from complications of HBP and diabetes so I decided it was in my hands to begin to control the disease process while I still can thru diet and exercise.

After #2 it was truly the day I took control over my own health doing research on knee pain solutions and gradually worked my way up to walking more normally again. Along with that I began LC eating and voila my generalized pain pretty much went away. No need for ibuprofen or other over the counter pain meds on a regular basis. It has been a year since #2. I started LC woe in sept of 2013 and I am down 50 pounds.

I have a LONG way to go but can honestly say I am on a path of recovery and have not felt this good in years.
on the 50lbs -- that's amazing, GO4IT! Every successful day of this WOE is one day closer to reaching your personal goal! Wishing you much success in that journey!

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Old 03-15-2014, 09:48 AM   #22
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I was in the Costco parking lot unloading my stuff and the cart rolled away. I ran about 15-20 FEET..... DOWNHILL..... to catch it before it hit someone's car and I was out of breath.
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Old 03-17-2014, 01:22 PM   #23
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Thanks so much Just Jo! It does feel great to move and feel stronger again!
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Old 03-23-2014, 10:39 AM   #24
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My final Straw

My mother (73) and grandmother (96) live on the other side of the country from me. Every year, my husband, son and me fly out to stay with them for two weeks. Last year was a pretty difficult one financially. We couldn't afford to fly the three of us out -- but we could afford for one of us to go. My husband is thin and my little boy is, well, little. I've depended on taking up parts of their seats during the plane ride for years. Long story short, I didn't see my MOM AND GRANDMA last year because I was TOO FAT and ashamed to fly alone. Now my grandmother is dying and I DIDN'T SEE HER this last year because I STUFFED MY DAMN FACE SO MUCH THAT I DIDN'T FIT IN A PLANE SEAT.

That was my last straw.

I WILL get out there this summer. I will NEVER let fat keep me from loving my family ever again.
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Old 03-23-2014, 12:22 PM   #25
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Not2BaBeachballBride View Post
My mother (73) and grandmother (96) live on the other side of the country from me. Every year, my husband, son and me fly out to stay with them for two weeks. Last year was a pretty difficult one financially. We couldn't afford to fly the three of us out -- but we could afford for one of us to go. My husband is thin and my little boy is, well, little. I've depended on taking up parts of their seats during the plane ride for years. Long story short, I didn't see my MOM AND GRANDMA last year because I was TOO FAT and ashamed to fly alone. Now my grandmother is dying and I DIDN'T SEE HER this last year because I STUFFED MY DAMN FACE SO MUCH THAT I DIDN'T FIT IN A PLANE SEAT.

That was my last straw.

I WILL get out there this summer. I will NEVER let fat keep me from loving my family ever again.
Oh my gosh, I feel for you here. I have both my mother and grandmother on the other side of the country as well, and haven't seen them in about 5 years because of financial reasons. I'm happy that you have found the motivation to get healthy though. My only advice (coming from somewhere who know a little about how you feel), is that never let a momentary sense of embarassment around people you will never see again (the passengers), cause you to miss seeing those you love, because if the worst happens, you will regret is soo much! Stay strong! You are worth it!
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Old 03-23-2014, 12:52 PM   #26
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Seeing the scale go OVER 400 pounds; and my hips measuring 68". I am 67" tall.
Stick a fork in me, I was done.
NO MORE was I willing to put up with this, and didn't care what I had to do in order to change as I was a dead woman walking.
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Old 03-23-2014, 01:06 PM   #27
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Not2BaBeachballBride View Post
My mother (73) and grandmother (96) live on the other side of the country from me. Every year, my husband, son and me fly out to stay with them for two weeks. Last year was a pretty difficult one financially. We couldn't afford to fly the three of us out -- but we could afford for one of us to go. My husband is thin and my little boy is, well, little. I've depended on taking up parts of their seats during the plane ride for years. Long story short, I didn't see my MOM AND GRANDMA last year because I was TOO FAT and ashamed to fly alone. Now my grandmother is dying and I DIDN'T SEE HER this last year because I STUFFED MY DAMN FACE SO MUCH THAT I DIDN'T FIT IN A PLANE SEAT.

That was my last straw.

I WILL get out there this summer. I will NEVER let fat keep me from loving my family ever again.


I can't tell you how much I relate to this. I decided that I needed to start because I was going on a trip abroad and was worried about flying. I told myself I'd start in January, but by April, I was still eating like my normal self. That month, I went to Las Vegas for a conference and someone moved from the seat next to me on the plane because I was too big. I was so humiliated that I was like a zombie for the whole trip, petrified about flying home. Once I got back, I started my journey.
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Old 03-23-2014, 04:08 PM   #28
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Whatever the reason, "the last straw" -- we are all here now to support and help each other in this WOE. I found this site because I was starting to think about the maintaining part of losing all this weight and wanted support and to find out how people kept the weight off. It's not the losing the weight that's the hardest part, it's going to be keeping it off for EVER. There are many people in here who have kept the weight off for years and I am GOING to be ONE OF THEM.

I am wishing all of us much SUCCESS in our WOE journey!!!

“Success is not Final. Failure is not Fatal.
It’s the Courage to Continue that Counts.” Winston Churchill

“This WOE is not a diet,
It’s my salvation, my key to being
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Old 03-23-2014, 04:21 PM   #29
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For me it was a few things:
1- Needing a larger pant size in my scrub bottoms (needed 2x). I actually texted my hubby and told him that and his reply was "Sounds like a personal issue, isn't there a better solution than buying bigger ones?" That was my 'wake up call' so to speak
2- High Blood Pressure I have gained 40# since November due to meds I am on that make me incredibly hungry all the time. I now have high blood pressure because of it
3- Intimacy issues with hubby --yeah what intimacy? We are both way overweight it's difficult and we rarely have it. Would like to change that
4- Tired of being fat & lazy I just wanna be skinny and healthy and happy with my body.
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Old 03-24-2014, 08:07 PM   #30
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WOE: LCHF
As a kid I was skinny, active and something of an overachiever. I hit university and put on a few extra pounds. I hit grad school and added a few *more* pounds on. Then I had a bad reaction to my birth control and swelled up like a beachball.

All through this weight gain, I tried the usual low fat and more exercise route and it failed bad. I was constantly starving and plagued by cravings. After my reaction to my pill, my heath had crashed which made exercise not possible.

When I was accepted into law school, I knew I had to do something. I had no energy, my weight was ridiculous and I was too ashamed to go out with friends anymore. I knew without some kind of solution, I would never be able to keep up with the study demands. I just didn't know what to do. Then I had a chat with my father, who had begun to have cholesterol problems. He told me he was going LCHF. I had no idea what that was so I researched it and realized it might help me too. With nothing to lose, I decided to give it a go.

It's been around a month and a half and I have more energy than I've had in years. I may be the old lady in the classroom but I've got more drive and endurance that the fresh out of highschool students.

Loving LCHF.
backseatadventurer is online now   Reply With Quote
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