One month 'til Valentine's Day. Planning ahead.

So very true, Zer. We do need to give ourselves a good pampering when we can!

I love it when Eric has to be away for an evening and I can do a facial mask and then get in the sauna... then soak my feet... watch a good movie, etc. It gives me renewed energy.

Hi Zer,

I finally got signed up here.

Believe it or not, I usually manage a good soak in the tub with essential oils and a face mask once a week. It's a treat and therapy all in one.

Pamper yourself.

Tub? Oh, how I long to wallow in water. But until I can get in and out on my own, I cannot soak. Shower only.

That will change, I'm sure, as I let go of pounds and inches and regain power to rise on my own. We have a pool here that I could use, if I was able to climb out on my own. So I may be 'soaking' in a bathing suit before I am soaking in just my own skin in a hot bathtub! It's an option, once I am able to manage the climb up and out of the pool here. I've been in it only a few times in all the years I've lived here. And the lure of floating at a lighter gravity is so seductive that it was hard to leave the pool and return to earth gravity. My heart was so overworked that I sat poolside for a while before I got up to walk indoors. Big heavy heartbeats. Scary to be aware of one's massive weight as gravity changes!

Thanks, Lisa, for coming to my BLOG and commenting.

Maybe you too will begin a BLOG here? I hope so!

Do you know I've never went out on valentine's day....
never never.

I hardly dare to hope this year that I may. Doesn't look promising!

Des, I found out late in life that men do not plan a lot of stuff that goes on socially. Who knew? Apparently, wise women have a way of establishing when and where men show up for dates and weddings and stuff. I never had a clue, so have been waiting for the phone to ring. I'm 64.

What I am saying is that now is the time for a wise woman to let her intended date know when and where to show up, what corsage to buy, what gift to purchase, all of the stuff that a guy might like to know. I swear, this is all news to me and I'm not sure just how it works, but I sincerely believe that guys do not on their own arrange dates and memorable evenings. I think a guy is glad to have a woman tell him when and where to show up, to dress him appropriately and to create a romantic event that he gets all the credit for. Good luck figuring out how this works. I'm just beginning to catch on. LIFE!!!

Lol, t his would be so much easier to do if I was assured on him being interested in doing so!

Interested? A well-trained guy is interested in what he is told to be interested in by the Goddess who dispenses all rewards. Okay, that sounds brutal, but we are talking here about conditioning a man to be what we want him to be - interested in pleasing US - right? (Or am I missing the point here?) Mind you, I'm single at 64, for a reason.

Yes, but the training can be fun for both! (wink!)

Aha, as 'they' say, when the student is ready, a teacher appears! Teach ON, kuukuu!!! I'm all ears. Hope springs eternal. When I get down to 199#, I may be ready for dating and dancing and all that stuff I missed in my youth. Yep, I'm thinking to work in some dating in my mid-60s!

I finally figured out a way to get to your blog without getting frustrated and giving up. The bookmarks tool. Duh. (LOL!)

I look at relationships with men like walking a dog. Sit! Good boy! Fetch! What a good dog! Reinforce good behavior with praise. Correct bad behaviors bluntly and then move on, never bringing up the past again. Correct only the current blunder. Then move on. This has worked fabulously with my sons. Of course there are the men who cannot be corrected. My Ex for one. An alcoholic, bipolar, misogynist. But to as limited a degree as he was able, he did respond well. And it's not to say that men are dogs, even though in some respects they act like dogs, it's that many have similar thought processes.

Yes! You and my father's 2d wife (he often said she was his FIRST wife, meaning he felt safe and befriended with her as he had never felt safe and beloved with any woman since his mother - and I'm not sure he felt as good with her as he felt about Mildred) understand men! She corrected a lifetime of bad-boy behavior by REWARDING him for good stuff so often that he grew a hunger for being told he was a good good boy - and she curbed his worst habits by withdrawing approval, just by refusing to pet and pay attention to him until he was once again displaying good behavior.

She shared this with me as I told her I had never heard him laugh with my mother in a 20yr marriage - and he laughed all the time in his 30+yr marriage with Mildred. All the time. Laughed right out loud as he told me Mildred was his best friend. She said the same. BUT...she also told me how she was with him when he did the awful things that he had a habit of doing.

She did not shout. She did not nag. She said that when he reverted to his selfish behavior, she simply did not allow him to do the small things for her that delighted his soul and made him feel that he had a Best Friend.

You, my dear, are a genius - as was Mildred.

Lots of petting and approval creates a desire to do what brings more petting and approval. Once that is set, a guy - or a dog - knows he holds the key to happiness. He's trained.

It's almost like watching The Dog Whisperer on the national geographic channel, LOL. But when I watch it, I'm struck by the similar techniques Mr. Milan and I both use, just on different species!

Only one week now, until V'Day on the 14th, and I am not quite managing to take care of myself - much less pamper myself. I see my feet are crying for a little care, a little soak in a fragrant hot basin and rubbing to bring back the pinkness to toes and heels that are not looking as if anyone takes care of these feet that do so much to convey me back and forth. Shame on me, for neglecting myself. Ah, shame. So, shall I manage today to do just one nice thing for these feet?

Maybe I can do that, just one nice thing for all these toes that seem so senseless, insensate with a nutritional neuropathy that my HMO refuses to take seriously so that I can see a podiatrist on a regular basis or have my toenails trimmed and feet looked at by a health-care professional. If I were diabetic, my HMO tells me, all of that would be taken care of - but with a nutritional neuropathy from my mid1970s WLSurgery (reversed as I lost 200# too fast and got a serious peripheral neuropathy from toes to nose), I'm not eligible for medical care for these numb feet.

So, it's up to me. Footcare. Clipping. Callus care. Sure wish I could trust myself to try a pedicure, but I am afraid of being poked, of infection. So, it's up to me to soak, pumice, trim, bring back the pink toes that I will probably find after an hour's diligent work to reach each foot in turn, scrubbing and rubbing and trying to see as I clip toenails that are difficult to see and tricky to cut without drawing blood. AGHHHH!

That's my self-absorbed ramble for today - Feb.7 - just a week before V-Day, a day I'd like to see pretty pink toes on pretty pink feet. My own sweet feet!

Friday, Feb.8, and counting down to Feb.14, a scant six days away. What plans shall we make for V-Day, those of us who are not coupled in a cozy coupling? How shall we plan to celebrate loving - on a day dedicated to people pledging their love? Can we pledge to love our own self? I'm not sure how constant I am in my own devotion to myself. I see all sorts of neglect, even as I am being better to myself than ever before. Sigh. What if we truly cannot give (or expect) anything that we cannot give ourself? If I hope someday to be cherished by someone, I'd better learn to cherish my own self. At 64, my learning curve is precariously steep - nosebleed steep. I am challenged to learn to treat myself with affection and respect, as I contemplate my LC plan and how well - or how badly - I manage it on a day-to-day basis.

I keep a food diary, noting what I've eaten. At least I have learned that much from my LC plan. Grateful for that, as prior eating in carby haze was never quite clear from day to day. At least now I know my sins, where I miss the mark, as I aim casually to lose weight - ounce by precious ounce.

Can I do better than this? I'd BETTER do better, if I hope to win attention on future Valentine Days from a swain who will offer me his love and his life - as he strives to measure up to the standards that ~I~ set.

YES! I am creating my own future. Bite by bite!

This V-Day, I commit to treating myself as if I love me - as if I cherish my own self. I can ~DO~ this!

It's here. Valentine's Day. Saint Valentine, a martyr to love, is commemorated with a flurry of flowers, cards and carby tokens of love, affection, adoration.

My gift to me? Respect. Hope of a less-weighty future. Yay! My new talky scales (a b'day gift from me to me) report that diligence in making LC choices DOES pay off!

My newly trimmed toenails on pretty pink feet are a nice reminder that I ~CAN~ show loving care to my body, a new feeling for a badly neglected body. My own neglect. My own new direction, taking better care of my own body.

That's what I'm celebrating today. I me! Yay!