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Old 04-16-2013, 05:42 PM   #121
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I am sharing a very sad story right now. So if you don't want to read this, please skip it.

My husband's sister is 60 years old. She and her husband came to visit us and her mother last November. She could barely get around as her ankles and legs were retaining fluid. Her 89 yr old mother is in a nursing home with dementia but is in better health. She told us that this was the last time she would be coming back to NH to visit her mom because it was such a grueling trip. I explained that I could help. I used to retain tons of fluid until I stop eating sugar and grains and alcohol. I shared a little and told her I would help herif she was interested.

We are an alcohol free zone in our house. We don't buy it and don't bring it into the house. My DH and DD are recovering alcoholics. I respect them by not bringing it into our home.

The first night they were here, I thought SIL was acting strange. Her husband told me later that she was drunk. I told him we don't have alcohol in the house and asked where it came from. He said she carries the vidka around in her purse. The next morning I was picking up the house; they had gone out. There was a glass of water next to her chair. I picked it up and smelled. It was pure vodka. I asked my husband how he wanted to handle it. I asked if it was all right with him if I said something. I talked to my daughter. They were both okey with it. So that night I explained to SIL how we don't bring alcohol into the house because my DH and DD can't have it around and out of respect for them, we ask that no one bring it in. She was ok with it. As far as I could tell, she didn't drink in the house anymore. She slept a lot and was laying down a lot.

Today we received an email that she had been helo/vacked to the hospital because she was bleeding from the nose. Most likely she drank most of her life. She was moved to a larger hospital with extreme liver failure. We don't know if she will make it or if she will need a liver transplant. I don't think an active drinker is very high on the list for donors as there is a good likelihood she will destroy the new liver. So when she told us last Nov that she wouldn't see her mother again, I think she new what was going on. If you get your annual physical, that is one of the things they test for in the blood workup.

Please keep her in your prayers. This story is shared in the hopes it might help someone who is on the edge and thinking, why not? What could one more drink do? Her story is what one more drink can do. Please take this to heart. I am going to share the same story on the other thread.
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Old 04-17-2013, 04:12 AM   #122
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It's very sad, Mary, and sounds very serious.
My heart goes out to you and to your sister in law.
You show great thoughtfulness in supporting your DH and DD in not keeping alcohol in the house. That seems to me the first line of defense.
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Old 04-17-2013, 06:49 AM   #123
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Thanks for sharing Mary. I'm sorry to hear this. I always think that. I don't know why I'm struggling so much right now. Nothing in my life can just settle down and go right, I think that's why I can't stay on for long. I need to just go away alone. If I were alone I think I could do it.
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Old 04-17-2013, 07:43 AM   #124
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I understand the need to be alone. It gives time for focus and reflection.
It's really to stay on plan with work and homelife going on at a furious pace.

I've been feeling more anxious yesterday and this morning. I recognize that as a trigger for drinking, so I just need to keep that recognition in focus.

Good day, everyone.
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Old 04-17-2013, 08:22 AM   #125
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I agree Bella. I think I need to go get me some Sam-E. I was taking it for a long long time last year and my anxiety seemed better. It's been getting worse. I'm sure the carbs and alcohol don't help. As soon as I get some money I'm going to get some.
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Old 04-17-2013, 03:16 PM   #126
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Not familiar with Sam-E.
Maybe worth a trial.
I take small amounts of 5-HTP and seems to help a bit, too.
I did get home without making a grocery run!
So I am keeping on keeping on.
I do wish the sun would shine, but looks like rain seige will continue longer here my little midwestern home. Really better than snow, I know, and everything was so horribly dry last year that the rain is a blessing in the short run but we could do without the flashing flooding. blah blah blah
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Old 04-19-2013, 06:49 AM   #127
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I'm here Bella. Been sick. No not from drinking lol. I'm AF. I lost a day yesterday because I was so sick so I'm not sure how many days I'm AF? Like 3-4 I think? IDK alcohol is the last thing on my mind, though.

I researched 5-htp when I researched SAM-E, and my reservation about 5-HTP was there were links to medical problems. It's been over a year ago so I can't remember exactly what, but that's what made me choose SAM-E.

I hardly ate anything yesterday I was so sick. Had a couple cups (not actual cups, the pre-made cups) of sf jello and some diet 7 up. I still don't feel 100% today but I'm here.
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Old 04-19-2013, 04:30 PM   #128
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Sorry to hear you've been sick Michelle, hope things are starting to look up.
I struggled a bit today, mostly getting discouraged a bit from everyday stuff.
There will be days like this, eh? I didn't cave to food or drink, so that's going to have to be good enough. I think if the sun will come out, that is going to help a lot. It's been really rainy cloudy and cold for many days running. Ugh.
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Old 04-19-2013, 05:52 PM   #129
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Hope you feel better, Michelle, and Bella, great jib making through the difficult times today. The sun will come out tomorrow as it says in the Annie song.

I had nervous pains in my stomach today as time gets closer. It didn't help that we are going through a massive laptop switch at work and we have to get our docs in order. Stress, it's a killer. Tonight I am just going to relax.

Have a great day y'all.
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Old 04-20-2013, 05:23 AM   #130
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Yes, much better this morning. And the sun is out!
I know that I am a morning person . . . I nearly always reach my low point at the end of the day and nearly always feel better in the morning. It helps to that it is a weekend and I get a reprieve from some of the work stresses.

Good luck to you Mary. I've forgotten what day is your big day . . . I know it is soon.
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Old 04-20-2013, 10:02 AM   #131
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7:45 am on the 24th is the scheduled time. I have to check in at 5:30 am. I am a nervous Nellie about it. P,ease keep me in your prayers that morning.
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Old 04-21-2013, 10:11 AM   #132
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You can count on it, Mary.
I can understand the nervousness.
Try to stay busy as best you can.
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Old 04-24-2013, 08:17 AM   #133
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I'm here and doing better than weeks past. I did drink last Saturday but that was it. It sucked. I of course got down more. But I'm going strong and feeling better. Knock on wood.

I got my thyroid medication straightened out, I know it will take time but I'm back on my original meds. I also started taking SAM-E again this morning. It might not have any real effect but in my mind it helps a lot.

I got a scale yesterday which is my key. If I don't weigh I cant see how much damage I've done. When I have one, I'm much more prone to losing weight. I'm determined to get back down to my "skinny" self lol.
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Old 04-25-2013, 05:28 AM   #134
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Sounds like you are really focused, Michelle.

Last couple of days were emotional roller coasters, but I passed the worst of it for now without drinking. I was just wiped out last night. Fortunately I wasn't craving alcohol or food and could just zone out. I am better this morining. My mornings are nearly always better, but sometimes that is hard to remember when it is evening.

Have a good day all. The sun is out and it is warmer, so looking good for me at this point.
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Old 04-26-2013, 07:40 AM   #135
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Great job Bella for getting through it and not drinking.

I have also abstained. So proud of myself. I have wanted to drink really badly the last two nights, even bought vodka on Wednesday night, but I did not.

I feel good.
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Old 04-26-2013, 04:42 PM   #136
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Fantastic, Michelle!
I am doing better now, seem to have recovered from my midweek slump.
I am sure sunshine and warmth and weekend have a lot to do with it.
But darn I was really tired . . . I slept nearly 12 hours last night. Weird.
Thankfully I had the day off work.
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Old 04-28-2013, 01:46 PM   #137
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I was going to quit drinking on Thursday since I had my first appointment with my substance abuse counselor, but unfortunately she says it will be dangerous to quit cold turkey. I am going to a 3 day inpatient detox program starting Wednesday, and until then I am just trying to cut down a bit, but have been told not to stop yet. I know when I stop drinking I will be able to go back to low carb, and I will save a ton of money.
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Old 04-28-2013, 02:08 PM   #138
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I will be praying for you scintilady, hope it all works out for you.
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Old 04-28-2013, 02:19 PM   #139
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Thanks so much for the support. I think this thread was really helpful in getting myself to own up to the fact that I need to quit. Now the hardest part for me will be telling my friends and my daughter, who don't have any idea how bad things have gotten.
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Old 04-29-2013, 03:42 AM   #140
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I can understand that being the hard part. But it may be that they have more insight than you know . . . is your daughter still at home or left the nest? My guess is that they will be proud of you for taking this step. And of course, we will be here to cheer you on.
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Old 04-29-2013, 04:50 PM   #141
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My daughter is 29, has been out of the house for 10 years. Currently I live with my "best friend with benefits" for lack of a better term. He's 11 years younger than me and very supportive. It's a little stressful since he moved in because he has 3 little boys (5,8, and 10) who stay with us every other weekend. Good little kids, but I'm older, and not used to it yet. Thanks for cheering me on!
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Old 04-29-2013, 07:18 PM   #142
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This morning we heard that my husband's sister lost her battle with addiction. She had not only the food problem but the alcohol problem. By the time, she arrived at the hospital a couple weeks ago, the doctor said her liver was shot to hell. It is called cirhossis of the liver, the poor liver just has to work too hard cleaning the blood and stops functioning. She was not a candidate for a liver transplant because she was active in her addiction to the end. Please keep her in your prayers. 60 years old...too young.
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Old 04-30-2013, 07:43 AM   #143
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I'm so sorry to hear that Mary.
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Old 05-02-2013, 08:03 AM   #144
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Still AF. Had a horrible horrible day yesterday. Bought alcohol. Left it in the car. Didn't drink. But boy I wanted too.
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Old 05-02-2013, 08:18 AM   #145
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Michele, good going! one more day! Did you return it to the store or dump it down the drain? It is poison to your body.
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Old 05-05-2013, 01:50 PM   #146
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I can now officially say that I can post on the "not drinking" edition of this thread!! I went in on Wednesday for an inpatient detox, and it's such a relief. I haven't even thought of drinking since I got out. It was no fun, but it was the best thing I have done for myself. I only had to stay 2 days, and there were people there who are coming down from really bad stuff who stay for 10 days or more. It was interesting, since i had no idea what I was in for when I got there. Intake was a bunch of questions and a breathalyzer test. Everything I had with me, such as my purse, cell phone, clothes, etc, was taken away and locked up. I had to change into hospital johnny and bathrobe, but first they made me take off underwear and bra so they could search it. When I got to my room they came and gave me 2 valium, took a bunch of blood, and told me there was a library if I wanted to read, since there was no TV and outside books were not allowed. i went to the library and found that the only books available were books about AA and alcoholism/drug addiction, and Bibles. I had dinner after that, and it was pretty good, as hospital fare goes. One thing they did was feed us very well. With my night meds I got a shot of vitamin B, and a trazodone for sleep. I was still awake by 1:30 AM, so they gave me another trazodone, and I went to sleep. The next 2 days were spent in meetings, which were quite informative. All of the counselors and many of the nurses are former addicts or alcoholics themselves, so they are credible. One of the counselors compared alcoholism to an allergy. he said normal people are not allergic to alcohol, and alcoholics are, meaning that when they drink, bad things happen. He said that if you knew you were allergic to tomatoes, you probably would give up tomatoes, but the alcoholic knows they are "allergic" (meaning they can't handle) to alcohol, and continues to do it anyway, even though they take the chance on wrecking their lives, health, etc.
I also realized how blessed I am, compared to most of the people in there. I chose to go on my own, a lot of the rest of the patients were sent there. I have a nice home with loving partner to go back to, and some of them had lost everything, and were going back to a shelter or prison. And amazingly, I was the only one out of 24 people who was on the first visit there (and the last for me, as far as I'm concerned). There were 21 year olds who were on their 5th or 6th admission. I am truly thankful that this place exists, and I think it takes special people to work there. They were so comforting and non-judgemental to people who were at the lowest point in their lives.
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Old 05-05-2013, 02:21 PM   #147
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Welcome back and for sharing your story! It will be good to have another voice on this thread.How did it go when you told your nearest and dearest?
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Old 05-05-2013, 02:40 PM   #148
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My daughter said she was proud of me! My partner, Jim, was the only other person who knew about it, and he was great. He dropped me off. It still was hard for him to believe I needed it, since he didn't see me drinking as much as I did (hiding bottles under the bathroom sink where I could lock myself in!) but I told him how much I had been drinking and he was really surprised. Of course men are not necessarily the most observant creatures, anyway!
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Old 05-05-2013, 02:59 PM   #149
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Also, Now I can go back to low carbing. I wasn't doing that when I was drinking because I was drinking so much the wine carbs made it useless. I have been low carb again for 2 days, and it's OK.
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Old 05-05-2013, 03:32 PM   #150
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Scintillady, we are all proud of you for taking a step to have a life second to none. It all begins with the step you took to check yourself in for peace during the first few days. We never have to go through it again, so long as we don't take the first drink. Food addiction is much the same. I am allergic to the sugar and grains used to make alcohol. So so long as I don't pick up the first bite of ..., I don't have to detox again from it.
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