I really want to drink today

[MsWoods]

as a coping mechanism. I'm going through a tough week emotionally and today I just broke down and want to drink. I want to forget and pretend to be happy for a while. I really really want to. I'm trying to be strong and not drink but I don't know what else to do to keep my mind busy.

[Looweewoo]

You don't say whether you are an addict of either alcohol or other drugs. If not, maybe that's not such a problem, if you are, then it simply will not make you happy. You won't cope, you won't forget, and it won't be just "for a while".

I'm going to assume you are, because you posted here, and say that you did the right thing by posting. Stay here and respond to me and we can talk.

[TXLoser]

we are here for you...how can we help

[MsWoods]

Drink. I'm an alcoholic. I have drank a couple times socially with no problem. Now I want to drink because I'm emotionally stressed. I'm in my * I just don't give a crap* mode. I was an alcoholic for 2+years. I mean drinking a half gallon of Vodka in 2-3 days. I drank every single day. I stopped 100% in June because I thought I was going to die and have drank 3-4 times since then socially but nothing triggered me to want to keep drinking.

Now I want to drink for the dependent reasons. I have never known how to deal with my strong strong emotions without a coping mechanism, IE cutting/alcohol/drugs/eating.

I've been coping by saying to myself, oh just get through today tomorrow will be better, you know it will. This too shall pass. But, it's not this week, and it sucks.

[Looweewoo]

Most alcoholics I know have never been able to drink again with any long term success. While one or two drinks can sometimes be had with seeming little consequence, eventually the idea that it's ok to drink if you are just strong enough or enough time has elapsed or because you had one and it didn't seem to set you off, those ideas fail the test of time.

Coping with your emotional problems is a whole other thing and will take some time. It can only be done if you do not drink, mostly because if you drink, you won't do the other work you need to do. For me I found that it was mostly a spiritual problem, but others have found relief from psychological counseling or even the Amino Acid discussions going on in this forum.

From the way you sound, can I suppose you have never been to an AA meeting?

[LoraJR72]

Ms. Woods.

You are not alone.

[metqa]

I'm not alchoholic or have any issue with drinking. I rarely drink, but for about two weeks during a really low period, I wanted to drink just for the effect of it. then I went to a party at BF's to try to cheer up and he gave me a mixed drink that have just a bit of alchohol, so that I couldn't really taste it. I was able to relax a bit and enjoy without feeling like I had depended on "alchohol' even though I did. Cause it was just a good tasting beverage and a social event instead just a glass of lonely vodka by my self.

I haven't wanted 'a drink' since, since I think it was the combination of things that made me feel "better".

I don't know if that helps or not, but maybe get out and if you feel you still want the drink, make it social so that you are not depending solely on the beverage for the feeling.

[MsWoods]

That would be correct. I quit drinking with no support and basically just had to do it myself. That's just how it is in my family. Everything I have overcome I have done on my own. I went to a therapist when I was cutting and she was the biggest quack ever so I don't really trust therapist.

I think I'm over the biggest part today for now anyways, maybe I just needed to vent, I dunno.

Thanks for listening though.

[Looweewoo]

To me, running a close second to the recovery from active alcoholism, is the kind of support for everyday frustrations, emotional upsets and real life crisis that groups like AA and OA give me. If you can get to a meeting do please give it a try. If you don't like the meeting you go to, try another, they are as different as the individuals in them, and it's usually easy to find a group that you fit in with.

Until then I will look for your posts and be of whatever help I can.

[MsWoods]

Thank you Loowee.

[metqa]

Happy Wednesday to You!

[Shayde]

Try to do everything and anything to get your mind elsewhere today. If you give in and drink to relieve stress or to escape your problems now, you will do it next time as well. There will ALWAYS be something.

And it is your addiction that wants to drink, not you MsWoods!

You can do this...you are strong.

[MsWoods]

I didn't. I got through it, dunno how, but I did.

Thank you all for listening to me whine. I'm feeling more positive tonight.

[Looweewoo]

That's so great!

I spent half the night with a guy who wanted to drink. It's no fun when the craving hits. But each time you make it through, it makes it that much easier the next time.

[MsWoods]

Thanks Loowee, I appreciate your words today and congrats on battling your own demon.

[peanutte]

Oh, I'm so glad you made it through, Ms. Woods. I know that was tough, but you did it!

[CherylB]

Ms. Woods,

I am moved by your post from yesterday when you were going through a difficult few moments. I, too, have addictions and crutches (don't we all??), and alcohol is one of mine. I know when I have periods when I just want to crawl into a bottle, something has triggered an emotion that I don't want to either acknowledge or face. Looking over your Stats, I see you are on the verge of a milestone. You've come a very long way on your weight loss journey, and now you are almost in the 200's! Could this be causing you some apprehension?

Along with all the good parts of losing weight, come some insidious feelings and old baggage left un-dealt with. I'm not a big believer in going for counselling, but maybe you have a close friend who you can confide in. Maybe during the conversation with the person who knows and deeply cares for you, some ray of insight might shine through.

Drinking does nothing to make you feel better, or to cope better with life; it just puts off facing our feelings. It just gives you something to do with your hand and your mouth. I know all too well.

Be strong; you know you already are!

Peace and hugs,

Cheryl

[metqa]

Congrats for you MsWoods. Glad you made it through. See ya round!

[Looweewoo]

It's too late now, but in retrospect, and by reading some of your other posts, I noticed that you were also very low on calories, and had perhaps some personal issues going on. Do you know about the "HALT" saying?

Don't get too:
H ungry
A ngry
L onely or
T ired

I suspect you might have had one or two of those things at once. Maybe it will help you in the future to think about how your biochemistry can sabotage you and make you think you want something you would otherwise know that you do NOT want.

[metqa]

I learned HALT from watching the movie Fight Club

A good thing to remember.

[MsWoods]

Originally Posted by Looweewoo

It's too late now, but in retrospect, and by reading some of your other posts, I noticed that you were also very low on calories, and had perhaps some personal issues going on. Do you know about the "HALT" saying?

Don't get too:
H ungry
A ngry
L onely or
T ired

I suspect you might have had one or two of those things at once. Maybe it will help you in the future to think about how your biochemistry can sabotage you and make you think you want something you would otherwise know that you do NOT want.

I have actually never heard of that, but it sounds like a combination of some of those. I haven't been eating much this week and when I don't eat my mood/attitude/thought process isn't as sane as when I eat regularly. I'm betting this has something to do with stable BS huh Just another reason to love LC'ing.

Thank you Cheryl, Peanutte, Loowee, metqa, and especially TX

Someone tried to peer pressure me into drinking last night for social reasons and I firmly declined. My weight loss and health are more important at this point.