Filling the Void with Food - June

[Bobbin]

Brilliant: Good luck with your mom coming tomorrow. Do me a favor. If/when she comments on how good you look, hug her, say thank you, and then let it go. I know I've commented on how good someone looks before, and not because I thought they looked "terrible" or WERE terrible before. Just simply because I think they look great, and I want them to know I've noticed all their hard work is paying off.

Also, please try to be strong through TOM, I bet you'll see something good on the scale. I know these next few days will be hard, but I have faith in you!!! If you do slip, don't beat yourself up, just get back OP and remember you have to take care of yourself to be your best for everyone else, and that means feeding yourself the right foods!!

Saundra, I'm glad you liked the water aerobics, is it shallow or deep water? I've been taking a deep water class for about 7 years now, off an on, I love it! I hope you're having fun with it.


OK, re: ME! Day 3 of being a good girl on my diet. I feel happy, but still battling urges every so often....Next shopping trip I'm not buying the boys ANY junk food other than what I can resist (ice cream~ no issues) All their sugar is calling me...what am I saying, even the peanut butter is calling me!! That's OK, bed time soon. I hope everyone had a great day today.

[moonbeam_2]

Hey everyone....Checking in again.

Brilliant: I leave for Vegas Sunday. I'm excited about my massages scheduled every day.
Food is doing ok. Not low carb, but portioned.

Waving to everyone! Have a great day

[brilliant100]

Originally Posted by saundra41

Steady I hope one day that I will be able to make goodies like that and not want any. Right now if I cant eat them I aint making them.
Brilliant- I once heard someone say that other people perception of us does not have to become our reality. So before and during and also after your mom visits tell yourself the truth about who you really are. And if you have a brain fart then reread what we have told you about yourself all the good things. Because to me you are a very important link in the chain we got going on here(smuches!)

Thanks Saundra - I will try to remember to come her and read before stuffing my feelings down.

[brilliant100]

Saundra - on the workout. You are doing great!

Bobbin - on getting back on track. I struggle on the weekends as my routine is diff. Hope you dont have this problem too.

Photomama - Is hubby feeling better about his weight? When my hubby gets like that, he swears off all food out of frustration Ive learned to just let him vent and work out like a mad man. It doesnt last to long as men see results super fast .

Moonbeam - massages...............Ohmygawd I love those and everyday you say!!!! Fun, Fun, Fun!

Steady - thanks for the words of encouragement regarding the mom issue. I adore her and she probably has not idea I react like that. I pray I dont pass this curse on to my daugher

[brilliant100]

The scale is creeping down. I truly believe the supplements are helping with the diet moodiness, diet depression and cravings. I am almost out of the chromium so gonna pick some up today.

Yesterday I did not binge. I felt a urge after typing here but it went away. I cleaned like a mad woman last night and feel good as the house now has that silent clean feeling. Plan to keep trying to follow the flylady's plan cuz it really helps bring me peace of mind when I stay on top of the cleaning.

I did a mini workout last night only because it was kinda late and the baby got fussy. Thats ok......................at least I got about 6 miniutes in on the bike. Better than nothing. Even that small amount made me feel like I accomplished something good. I read some where on one of the other boards that keeping the workouts easy in the beginning is KEY for staying on track. This is so true. I feel motivated to do something knowing that I can stop when I want and I dont have to go for the burn unless I want too.

Todays goal is to remain calm and content without stressing about mom arriving. I look forward to spending time with her, she has the best sense of humor and always makes me laugh hard. Its going to be wonderful seeing the baby play with her. We (our entire family) has been through some tough times in the last couple of months and now its time to enjoy things......

[PhotoMama]

Sounds like everyone is doing much better ... yes, even my hubby.

As for me ... I BROKE THAT NASTY 140 BARRIER!! 139.2 on the scale this morning. I hoping to lose a couple more by Monday's official weigh in. I think I've hit Ketosis ... I didn't eat dinner last night or have breakfast this morning because I just wasn't hungry. By 11am or so today, I felt like I was starving. We went to Chili's for lunch .. told hubby we could go if he stuck to plan. He did ... I ordered some grilled bbq salad thing but I only had room for about a third of it. I haven't even snacked today!

I remembered this morning that I have this black pair of pants that I love ... I just haven't been able to fit in them in forever. I'm trying to decide if I want to try them on or not. I'm the same weight I was when I purchased them and I know I haven't taken aerobics for that long but I've noticed a difference (my boobs stick out farther than my belly now) ... I just don't think I'm quite ready yet. I'm scared of being disappointed. KWIM? I really want to try them on though ... what if they fit ... you know... like they're supposed to?

[steady]

Originally Posted by PhotoMama

As for me ... I BROKE THAT NASTY 140 BARRIER!! 139.2 on the scale this morning.

Congratulations...that is a wonderful accomplishment . Workouts/LC eating are definitely working for you. IMO...I would just relish in the 139.2...wait on trying on the pants. Save that accomplishment for another day!

Interesting you mentioned ketosis, I could and can't tell when I am or not in ketosis. I show no real signs. I recently was at a drug store and picked up keto test strips on an impulse. I tried it and tested small amounts on Wednesday. Thursday tested small amounts. and yesterday nothing. The funny thing is yesterday I had alot of energy, and was is the best mood, because I thought I was eating better compared to Wednesday & Thursday. A good mood for means I am less likely to binge. I was surprised...I know not to rely on these, but I find it an interesting experiment. When I show ketones I don't lose my appetite. I don't think that will ever happen, anyway!!!

Brilliant---enjoy this weekend. I am seeing my mother too. We have alot of similar feelings about our moms.

Saundra- stick with the exercise classes...I realized from my morning run (which has been very rare lately) that exercise really does make one feel good. Go for it!!!

Bobbin- You just are the best. I can tell you, since I stop my journal rants and changed to writing "fleeting thoughts" I haven't binged and just feel better.

3 days no binges/cravings for me. I had enough energy to workout yesterday and today.
Enjoy your weekends.
--Anita

[PhotoMama]

I've decided NOT to try on the pants until I hit 135. At least then I KNOW I'll be able to at least button them.

The scale was nice to me again this morning ... probably because I haven't been eating hardly anything. 138.6! That's 8lbs down in almost two weeks. I'm not counting it though until Monday. I'm hoping to lose a bit more by then.

As for how I'm feeling ... at the moment I'm feeling lonely and bored. I wish I had something that needed to get done that involved contact with other people. I wish there was someone to call. I don't know ... some validation that I'm not the only one who feels like they don't have a life. My kids are here but ... I just don't feel like playing with them. I feel bad saying that. I just need some adult interaction (Hubby is filming a wedding tonight).

I'm trying my best to stay out of the kitchen. I did allow myself some peanuts and cheese. Other than that, I plan on not going back in there until 6 when I will be making dinner (a salad).

I've got the munchies so bad right now ...

[brilliant100]

Hi All,

Mom is there and things are cool. Chatting with you here really helped me sort out the feelings before they became a problem. Thank you!!!!

[ellief]

hey everyone. . im new to this site. im currently abroad for a few months and was doing great low carbing. and wasnt even eating "bad" allowed foods like sf choc etc. . this was mainly due to the fact that i cant read hebrew, and now have slowly learned. i started bingeing on sugar free things here, and that led to all out bingeing for a good 4 days. the worst part is that im going home to see my boyfriend and be in my best friend's wedding in about one week. i feel absolutely horrible and am so happy ive found a site that can help me when i feel like bingeing. just knowing there ar eother people in my situation is comforting and that i can talk to peopel without judgement.
hope everyone is having a successfull day!

[PhotoMama]

Welcome Ellief!

Well, today has been ... hell really. It started out bad. Last night, I had looked up all the symptoms of Ketosis (I probably already told you this but I can remember) and I have a majority of them. I was thankful that I didn't have the nausea and vomiting. Yeah ... this morning ... I woke up feeling sick. I can't be the mother/wife that I need to be feeling the way I did this morning so ... for lunch I had a good carb filled meal.

I had a turkey bacon club sandwich on wheat bread, baked chips and a diet soda. I also had maybe a cup of Oreo shake. The latter I could have done without but ... I was trying to do it all within one hour and honestly, I don't feel like I went overboard. Dinner, I went back to low carb.

I feel better but I'm very very VERY irritated about everything. I was irritated yesterday (and possibly the day before). No matter what anyone does ... I'm trying so hard not to snap at them. I seriously feel like smacking people even ones I don't know. Don't worry, I won't. I just want to know ... What's wrong with me? How do I ... fix it?

[brilliant100]

Hi Ellief. Nice to meet you. Tell us more about you. How did you end up overseas (student, job?).

[brilliant100]

Photomama - I hate when I feel like that for no reason. Ive been searching for supplements to help with my moods cuz they get weird when I am seriously dieting. So far these are making me sleepy but they work on chilling me out and I start to feel real mellow and calm. 5-htp and L-Tyrosine.

Congrats on hitting the 130's. I cannot image how the must feel. I wonder what I would look like at that weight..........when I get down to 150 hubby starts to complaine that I look to skinny (big head, small body :-) ). I bet could wear anything I wanted at 130.

[brilliant100]

well my eating was pretty good this weekend. I thought about binging a few times as there was all this yummy food in the house that we normally dont have (peanut butter, sliced cheese, crackers). I did not binge because I did not want to start over AGAIN and I know I would gain like 10 pounds and feel like crap.

Having mom here has created some stress. My hubby has asked me to talk to her about some things she has said and done. Minor but they will become irritating and cause hard feelings on his side if they continue. I feel so anxious to bring it up to her because she will turn it around and make it seem like I am attacking her. She is accustom to getting her way ALL the time but she has to adjust to my family's rules. She is hogging the TV which is really bugging my hubby. Thats all she does all day which is fine but he likes to control the remote. We have a second TV in the dinnig room but I know she will complain that it is not comfortable to sit in those chairs.

I talked to my brother about it as mom just visited him a few weeks ago. He said he felt my pain as she did a few things to pizzz his new wift off.

I so want to avoid dealing with this but I must..............would rather eat..........


help..........how do I tell her that she needs to adjust. Watch what she says (bad not funny jokes) or being overall self-centered.

[saundra41]

Bobbin- Water aerobics going good. But it is in the shallow end of the pool, the side that we are in is 4ft and at the other end its 5ft. Last Wednesday and Friday I did the class but I had arrived an hour and a half early to try this class called chair yoga but I had the days wrong. So what I ended up doing was going upstairs to the treadmills and I walked 25 minutes I could only do 2.4 but I managed to burn 160 calories plus the class whatever that was. My fitness assessment is today and they have that machine where you put your weight in and choose the class that you took and for how long and it computes your calories for you.
Welcome Ellief- Yeap it sounds like this is the spot for you, there is alot of support on this thread and great women that post often and we support each other through this thing called life. I hope that you can stick and stay and put your bat down long enough to stop beating yourself up. It happens to all of us, most likely the binge was feeling related probably having to do with the future, as most of my binges are.
Brillinat- thank you for the support on me adding the workouts but let me tell you sometimes I feel that Kathy Bates from that movie Misery came out of the tv and hit me in my knees. But I am sure that my body is doing its thing as far as adjusting. I am so glad that things are going good with your mom and guess what my mom is coming too. They will be here in about a week and my 11 y/0 niece is staying will be staying with me for a few weeks. They have been taking care of her for about seven years and I will be giving them a break for a while. I am noticing that I am having some of the same thoughts that you had prior to your mother coming like.... how big was I the last time she saw me or I need to loose a huge amount of weight before she comes. I did tell her about the gym and the water aerobics class and how we could sign up for massages and she got excited about that.
Photomama- Congrats on breaking that weight barrier I will do the shimmy when I get out of the 320's and as far as your boobs being bigger than your tummy. Girl thank for that vision I look forward to sharing that situation with you one day. Oh girl plz dont smack anyone we need you here posting not in jail. Im sending hugs to you!!! I dont know but it sounds like there is some anger somewhere inside. Try to get away to yourself and journal and see if anything comes up. Whatever it is it will pass and you dont have to binge over it, it wont help trust me!

[saundra41]

Steady- thanks for the support I will stick it out. Tell me how do you do those icons like that I have not figured it out yet?

[brilliant100]

Bobbin - glad to hear the water arobics are going well. Ive also been sticking to my mini workouts and feel good about it. Alot of the good feelings have to do with not feeling guilty about not working out.

Ive noticed that I feel guilty about too many things: not cleaning the house, working out, spending time with baby/hubby/mom, reading the bible, eating gum.

some of the things on my Guilt list as just plain dumb.

If you feel like sharing, what do you feel guilty about like all the time?

[brilliant100]

kinda slow here today.

Everyone busy? Im lonely...................................

[saundra41]

Brilliant-hey girl, feeling guilty huh? Never even thought about starting a guilt list. OMG if I did my food choices would always be on there. Why would gum be on your guilty list, maybe if you can answer that question than you can get some insight on if it belongs on the list or not. Your mom still at your house, how long will she be in town?

[steady]

Ellief- Welcome. Feel free to jump in.

Photomama- we must be on the same thought regarding Ketosis...I looked up the symptoms too and got strips. When I am in it, I am sorta bummed and that leads to a binge. The days I was out, I had so much energy and was happy, but appetite does increase which could also lead to a binge. I fear registering any mood (happy/sad) is a triggers. I've got to find a food balance that can level out my mood and binges atleast somewhat.

DH has a new appreciation for nuts, since they are low carb and feels bad eating carby things in front of me. However, nuts are a binge food for me; it is what took me out of ketosis. I could care less about him eating cookies, its the nuts that drive me nuts!!! Nuts are too pickable...leads to mindless eating as my brain churns through my feelings.

Saundra- you are a hoot. Keep going with those exercise classes. Do as I say not as I am doing. I haven't exercised since saturday...I am waiting until the mood/energy strikes me again.

Brilliant- Oh my gosh. I know that feeling of dread/ unsettlement that you may have to deal with mom on behalf of DH. Tell mom, that DH wants to watch a particular show at a specific time. Then carefully instruct DH to snatch the remote and not let go!!!. I can relate to the temptation to binge on stuff that is not usually in the house.

DH has a new appreciation for nuts, since they are low carb and he feels bad eating carby things in front of me. However, nuts are a binge food for me; it is what took me out of ketosis. I could care less about him eating cookies, its the nuts that drive me nuts!!! Nuts are too pickable...leads to mindless eating as my brain churns through my feelings. Uggh.

Saturday day went well, but I was over hungry on Sunday, because my last meal was 16 hours prior. DH can go like that but I can not. I am so jealous of him. I had an insatiable appetite all day even after our big brunch (pork/chicken adobo) and binged on the supply of nuts, and then had to go to the store to replace the nuts so that DH would not notice. I'm ashamed and don't know how I or he would react if he found out.

I just want to be able to eat for the sake of nourishing my body. One day, One day. As well as working on my head, I think I need to go back to some sort of induction eating to rid cravings...it worked well for so long, but now I am bingeing but on low carb items. Maybe it is just TOM.

[PhotoMama]

141.2 this morning. I wish I could blame some of it on TOM but 'he' is not due for another week. I did eat the carbs the one time ... I controlled it. The next day ... yesterday ... I went to a pot luck lunch. It was like a carbfest! Dinner last night ... pizza. We had guests come in from out of town and it was the easiest way to feed everyone (there's nine here in the house ... 5 of which are children). I had three pieces! The only reason I didn't have more ... there wasn't any left. I know, I could have ... SHOULD have just had a salad but ...

I'm mad at myself. It took so much to get down below 140 and here I am working myself back up to where I started. Has anyone figured out the WHY to all of this?

BTW, breakfast this morning was just as bad as last night.

[brilliant100]

Photomama - Ohmygash, I am so close to doing something similar. My weight has bounced up and I am eating less than 1000 cals per day. The only thing I am over doing is sf gum. HTH do you gain 3 pounds from gum!!!!!


I am dang near starving myself and the scale is barely moving.

I so feel your pain about working hard to get the fat off then baammm..........derailed by whatever.

[brilliant100]

Come....lets have a pity party.......................I am so pizzed off and very frustrated! This sucks.

[momov2boys]

Hi there, I'd like to join this thread.

I started LC in March of 2006. At that time I weighed 122 pounds and it was 6 months after having my second son. (I am 5'2" and small-boned).

I went from 122 to 104 easily. Then I began watching calories and got down to 98 pounds. That is when all of my issues with food began...

Since then I have struggled with (and still battle) the binge monster. I used to binge only on peanut butter, which is my strongest food-addiction. Lately though, all nuts and nut butters lead me to bingeing. Worst of all, more recently, I have been bingeing on sugar, mostly in the form of chocolate and cookies--which is very unlike me.

I am up to 106 which is the most I've weighed in more than a year.
I am working very hard on getting in control again.

I've done Atkins-Kimkins-IE and have been back-and-forth with all plans.

I've come to realize that weighing below 100 pounds is probably not in my best health interest.
Unfortunately, I do feel that LC has affected my mind in negavtive ways too, along with the numerous positive ways.

I know I'm meant to LC, for life. I've just got to work on food not being such a focus in my life, anymore.

I have read many books which have helped me, especially: Intuitive Eating, by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch and Food Addiction--The Body Knows, by Kay Sheppard.

Anyway, to all of you. I hope to learn from and with everyone through our shared experiences.