Filling the Void with Food - June

[moonbeam_2]

Originally Posted by PhotoMama

I DID IT!! I stuck to plan yesterday!

Breakfast ... Sausage and eggs
Lunch ... Ribs
Dinner ... A salad (wanted something lite because I had aerobics again)

I did go to aerobics and the first thing the regulars had to say? "I HATE Tuesdays!" Hmmm ... I enjoyed it. I felt like I was more in shape than I thought BUT I could be in better shape. Last night we focused on the legs where as Monday it was the arms (I lift a 43 pound little boy 100 times a day ... I don't need too much work in the arm area, just some toning). I am VERY sore today. Thankfully the next class isn't until Thursday. The best part ab out class? I'm learning exercises that I can do at home ... now, if I could just find my training tubes.

Today .. I'm staying on plan again. No use in paying for an aerobics class if I'm just going to load myself up with junk, right?

Awesome job! Congrats

[PhotoMama]

Thanks!

[Bobbin]

Photomoma!!

[brilliant100]

Let's discuss this 'Filling the Void with Food' thing.

I am still doing it eventhough I am aware of what is going on. Sometimes the feeling is so intense that I feel like I must eat or I will break down (cry or something).

The sad thing is, I feel the void regardless of whether Im dieting or not. Even after eating all the yummy stuff............the void returns and I go seeking again.

The only thing that works short term is to try and replace the void with some other type of feeling by eating or keeping busy (cleaning, talking on the phone). Sometimes I slip into auto piloit when the feeling comes and just start seeking............................

Your thoughts?

[brilliant100]

I need a real solution........................Ive even tried praying.

[PhotoMama]

I try filling it the same way ... phone, instant messenger, message boards ... talking (whether via phone or internet) is the best solution for me. I run into problems when no one is home or busy/afk. Getting out of the house helps BUT it seems every I leave the house, I end up spending money and then regretting it later (luckily, today, I was able to take stuff back and get my money back for them).

Cleaning doesn't do it for me because eventually, I have to enter the kitchen ... the room I'm trying to avoid.

OH! Munching on ice! That's something I do. I get the chewing and the swallowing ... I get that feeling of eating without all that extra stuff (cals, carbs, fat, etc).

[Bobbin]

That's what compulsion & addiction are. I've shopped my way into debt before (conquered that thankfully), eaten my way to obesity, I don't know the answer or else I'd be thin and rich!

I guess it's just a matter of retraining yourself to have a different response when you're feeling the need to feed...boredom, lonliness, disatisfaction in life, happiness and celebration, stress relief. I get tired of hearing "Oh, take a bath" or "read a book, call a friend" but really, it's a matter of learning a different response to the urge.

I guess the core is to learn to counter our sabotaging thoughts. I'm going to start reading my "Beck Diet Solution" book (soon!) but I know one of the first steps is to write out on little cards why you want to lose weight, called "advantages response cards" You're supposed to write 20 or more reasons you want to be healthy and lose, and read them off and on (at least 5 times) during the day, and especially when you're tempted to eat. The premise is that you are ingraining a new thought process in your mind, even if you don't believe what you're reading right at that moment.

[PhotoMama]

Bobbin ~ I like the idea of the cards. 20 or more reasons I want to lose wait ... wow ... do I have that many reasons? This is most certainly something to think about.

Well, Day 2 is almost done ...
Breakfast was eggs and sausage .. again. I got some ham for tomorrow.
Lunch ... wasn't hungry but did have a slice of cheese and a scoop of peanut butter (not the 2tbs serving though).
Dinner ... left over ribs and a salad.

I've been terrible about my water. I need to work on that ... maybe make a chart again.

I'm anxious to see what the scale has to say in the morning but won't "officially" count the numbers until Monday.

[Bobbin]

Photo, in the book they have an example card with 20 reasons on it, but I haven't actually read it yet, so I may have misquoted myself! I'm sure it's just the most important reasons to you. You're supposed to take the card out at specific times of day, like 9, 11, 2, etc, the same time every day, then read the card again when you're feeling like you're losing control. What turned me on about the book (even though it's taking me forever to actually read it) is that it's not telling you WHAT to eat, ie: a specific diet. It just says to pick a healthy diet you know you can stay with forever. The point of it is to learn new responses to the old problems we have before, during and after the diet. How to get back on plan when we mess up, how to talk to ourselves in a positive way instead of a self defeating way.

Well, I did get back on program yesterday, but didn't work out. Today I will eat good again, but tonight I'm going to a fashion show downtown for charity, and I'm sure everyone will be drinking and eating things I can't have. I will be strong!!! It's funny, there's a lady I work with who's going tonight, she's always talking about how she does low carb...she'll offer me some cheezits or trail mix (with choc. chips & raisins in it) and say "Oh, you can have it, it's low carb!" I keep thinkin', you've never read a book on how to do low carb, have ya....

I hope everyone has a great day!!!

[PhotoMama]

No, that woman probably hasn't read the book. She probably doesn't even know what a carb is! You know the people that irritate me the most though ... the ones that think that LOW carb means NO carbs. That's why I always go through induction with just DH. Once I get through that and start adding in SOME carbs, it's all good.

I made it through day 2! 143.8 on the scale this morning. I have to admit, I was kinda hoping for a bigger lose ... but I eventually got over it and I'm happy it's a lose. Besides that, I'm not going to officially count the numbers until Monday.

Todays plan ...
Breakfast ... eggs and bacon
Lunch ... a salad
Dinner ... chicken or pork chops (whichever defrosts first)

BTW, I went and bought me so REAL workout clothes yesterday. I'm not sure why but ... I'm excited to wear them.

OH ... and DH has agreed that we can get a treadmill. I know, you can walk/jog around the neighborhood for free but ... this IS Texas ... and it's summer. IT'S FREAKIN HOT!!

[moonbeam_2]

Ya know...i think my "void" is food. When I'm trying to modify my diet, my body literally goes through depressive stages mourning certain things. Today is particularly hard for me so far....my body is asking for sugar and bread.

It's hard to fill this with other things because you have to eat to live. I can choose to eat the things that are better for me, but it leads me to a place sometimes where I rebel and eat things that I know are not good for my body or my mind. I have no answers.....

[moonbeam_2]

I've come across something interesting.....Emotional Freedom Techniques. Kind of a 'holistic' approach to 'healing' your realationship with food or other things that uses tapping on energy points on the body. I'll post a little about it in the next post, but just thought I'd throw it out there. Nothing gained if I don't try it.

I was about to binge this morning, and I used these techniques. I was able to control myself. Fluke? maybe....only time will tell.

[moonbeam_2]

First you'll need to find something that you're craving to eat. Please get that item now before we start. For this demonstration let's assume that you are craving a chocolate bar.

Step 1 - Measure the intensity of your craving for the chocolate bar. On a scale of 0-10,0 being no craving and 10 being an extremely strong craving, determine what your craving level is. For this test your craving level should be at least a 5. If it's not, then either pick something you crave more, or work yourself up to a higher level. How ? Try smelling the chocolate. Now imagine how good it will taste. Do this until your craving is at least a 5. Good, now make a mental note of what your intensity is.

The Setup
Step 2 - With the finger tips of one hand; begin tapping on the side of the other hand. Imagine dialing a phone with two fingers. You should tap hard enough to feel it, but not so hard that it is uncomfortable. You should tap on the part of the hand that would come in contact with a board if you were doing a karate chop. It is called the karate chop point and it is the fleshy part of your hand located about 1 inch below the base of the pinky finger. Continue tapping on the karate chop point and say the following affirmation 5 times.

Even though I crave this (you will use your food here), I totally accept and love myself.

In our example you would say

Even though I crave this chocolate bar, I totally accept and love myself.

Great! You have just finished the first step of The Basic Recipe. Now it's time to move on to the next step, The Sequence.

The Sequence

Step 3 - The Sequence is very simple to do, first however you must learn how to do the tapping correctly.

How to Tap

It is best to Tap with your dominant hand using the index and middle fingers. Tap solidly, however never hard enough to cause pain or discomfort. Tap about 7 times on each of the tapping points. If you find yourself tapping about 5 or 9 times that is fine also. As you tap repeat the following affirmation;

This (insert your food here.)

In our example ''This chocolate bar''

The Points

Eyebrow: At the beginning of the eyebrow to one side of the nose.
Side of Eye: On the bone bordering the outside of the eye.
Under Eye: On the bone about 1 inch below the eye.
Under Nose: On the small area at the bottom of the nose and the top of the upper lip.
Chin: Midway between the point of your chin and the bottom of your lower lip
Collar Bone: The junction where the collarbone and the first rib meet.
Under the Arm: About 4 inches below the armpit.

Congratulations you now have completed round 1. Now it's time to reassess you craving level. Determine the level that you now crave the food you chose. Most people will notice an immediate drop in the intensity level of their craving. If you were a 5 or 6, this process might have lowered it to a 1 or a 2, or possibly even 0.

You can further lower your intensity level by repeating the above process and changing the affirmations somewhat.

The new Step 2 affirmation would be ''Even though I still have some of this craving left I totally and completely love and accept myself''

The new step 3 affirmation would be

''Remaining (insert your food here) craving''

In our example ''Remaining chocolate bar craving''

[PhotoMama]

First off, I have to say ... I took DH's clothes to the dry cleaners and it's a given ... where there's a dry cleaners, there's a donut shop. Well, the kids wanted some so I got THEM some ... nothing for me! I felt really good about that ... I didn't go off plan AND I saved money.

Well, I've made it through my first week of aerobics and ... I LOVE IT! I can't wait until next Monday when I get to go again. BTW, the instructor gave us homework ... AT LEAST 15 min of abs over the weekend. I think I can handle that.

Otherwise ... the scale was good to me this morning ... 142.2. I'm anxious to see what it says Monday morning.

I don't know why but for once, I'm REALLY excited about losing weight AND getting in shape. I think it has a lot to do with the class. It's something that's MINE ... DH has work, DD has school, DS ... well, he's still too young to need something outside the home and away from the rest of the family ... and now I have aerobics.

Plan today ...
Breakfast - eggs and ham
Lunch - salad
Dinner - pork chops and maybe a salad

I did get some snacks yesterday for me and DH (did I tell you he's doing LC too?) ... peanuts, cheese and beef jerky.

[steady]

Hi Ladies:
I’ve read through your thread and it is if I am reading my own thoughts. Can I join your thread? If you look at my stats you may not believe I have an issue with weight, emotions and binge eating, but that is what brought me to low carb in Feb 2007. I use to binge on anything carby and/or sugary…I mean binge…the family size bag of pretzels, a box of cereal, a stack of pancakes w/syrup, and a loaf of bread in one sitting. Atkins has greatly helped me tame the sugar and carb cravings. However, the binge behavior is still there because of the void or emptiness that lurks. I now binge on legal foods, so the behavior and emotional components are still there.

From the outside, I appear put together, in control, and a go-getter, but inside I am stress ball worrying about keeping it all together and pleasing others. To keep it together, I push my feelings aside (happy, sad, nervous, and angry) until I have a moment to myself to “deal with it”. The binge has been my method of “dealing with it”. The binge feels like a moment where I can zone out and nourish/feed/rehash my feelings. The sad thing is it does feel good and satisfying at the time, but then the guilt of eating all that stuff sets in, then the nervousness about what I had just done, and then I become an exercise/diet fiend, and then I regroup and start the whole cycle again. The binge keeps me coming back because it does feel good albeit temporarily.

Once I stopped binging on HC/sugary things, weightloss is no longer an issue (sugar really is the root of all evil), but the emotional eating (binging) component is still there for the same reasons you all mentioned. I am trying to break this cycle…it is what holds me and you (IMHO) from us achieving our life goals, weight and all.

Can we do it together? I feel like this is the only place I can let my hair down.

[PhotoMama]

Welcome Steady!

You may have pointed out another reason why I binge ... keeping feelings inside. I've caught myself at times eating and crying at the same time. Wanting (And maybe needing) to blow up at DH (or someone else) but not wanting to hurt his feeling ... a fear of chasing him away because I made him unhappy. (Long story short, parents divorced ... Dad said he wasn't happy with Mom so he found someone to make him happy.) I go out of my way to make everyone else happy and usually end up being taken advantage of. Sometimes I wonder if I have any TRUE friends.

We can do this together.

[Bobbin]

Welcome Steady! You and Photo have written exactly how I feel at times. Steady, I can eat an ungodly amount of food during a binge, as well. It's sick, really. I've bought whole small cakes and eaten them in the car, along with candy, donuts...it's disgusting, but somehow comforting for a while.

Photo, I do the same thing with my feelings too. DH has no problem telling me what his issues are (not in a mean way, just a good communicator I guess!) but I just don't say anything about anything negative usually. My mom was a huge "nagger" (according to my dad) and I just didn't want to be that type of wife. So instead I hide my feelings about things, and eat in a unhealthy, sneaky manner.

I have a friend who's athletic, healthy and thin. I asked her what she does when she's angry or stressed. She goes for a bike ride or has a conversation with the person she's angry with...

[PhotoMama]

Originally Posted by Bobbin

I have a friend who's athletic, healthy and thin. I asked her what she does when she's angry or stressed. She goes for a bike ride or has a conversation with the person she's angry with...

here too

I used to clean the house when I was angry or upset. But then I would get even more angry or upset because I would start feeling like I was the only one who was cleaning around here.

We're getting a treadmill so I'm hoping that will help.

[steady]

Thanks for the welcome...it is conforting to know you all can relate. I feel more in control already.

PhotoMama & Bobbin- I've tried the cleaning thing too, but I also start get angrier as I pick up DH dirty laundry off the floor. Somehow, I usually break something during the cleaning rage.

Bobbin- Like your friend riding the bike, I tried running to vent some stress. Well it doesn't work for me...I usually can't concentrate on my workout and end up feeling like my time in gym was useless which worsens my mood. Go figure.

Since communication, especially directly, is a skill I lack, my temporary plan to deal with emotional eating, especially when I am alone is reading and responding to this and other threads...maybe even start a journal or something. I think the communicating my feelings in some form is better outlet than a binge. Eventually I will tackle the stressor head on, but one step at a time I guess.

Do you all journal or log food/exercise in any form? Any advice? Anyone want to join me? I use to keep a food/mood diary, but I obsessed over it and it stressed me when I neared my calorie/fat/carb budget. I felt like I was failing! But more seriously, I couldn't manage to enter or admit to what I ate during a binge. One moment in time, one meal at a time, one day at a time...that is how I am going to do this.

[PhotoMama]

I "cheated" but I don't feel .... TERRIBLE about it. I do feel bad but not terrible. DH decided that tonight was the night he wanted to go out for his Father's Day dinner. I had a slice of bread, some cheese "fries" (more like potato chunks) but only a serving of them and then a "chicken tender salad". I don't feel terrible about it because I don't feel like I went overboard. I felt like I was in control. I admit, I'm worried about what the scale is going to say in the morning but ... I knew what I was doing. I know the possible consequences. I just hope it's not going to do more damage than I think ... 'cause then I will feel TERRIBLE.

I'm off to clean like a mad woman ... we have company coming tonight and they haven't seen the "new" house (we've been here for almost 9 months). Maybe I'll work up a sweat and undo some of what I've done.

[steady]

Originally Posted by PhotoMama

I "cheated" ....but I don't feel terrible about it because I don't feel like I went overboard. I felt like I was in control. I admit, I'm worried about what the scale is going to say in the morning but ... I knew what I was doing. I know the possible consequences. I just hope it's not going to do more damage than I think ... 'cause then I will feel TERRIBLE.

Good for you... You ate like a "normal" person...you enjoyed it, you were in control of it. Way to go!

No clean like a mad women...it burns carbs!!! Hehe. Enjoy your weekend.

[PhotoMama]

Thanks Steady!

Well, the scale was good to me ... 142.6 ... but I know I'm not totally in the clear for another couple days. I'll just have to make sure I stay on plan.

For breakfast today - peanuts because our electricity went out. It's obviously back on now but ... I already had the peanuts.

Lunch - maybe I'll do breakfast for lunch (eggs and ham)

Dinner - a salad with hard boiled eggs and more ham

I did do some abs last night while waiting on our guests who arrived at midnight and left at 3am I knew we were just a stop over (free hotel) but that's ridiculous. The ab exercises are getting easier.

I'll be checking in quite a bit tonight ... DH has a wedding to film so I'll be home alone with the kids. I hope to see at least one other person here over the weekend ... not that I'm hoping that any of you have a dull weekend life like me but ... you know

[brilliant100]

Steady. Nice to meet you
I enjoyed reading your post. It was so powerful and so how I feel too. Thanks for joining us.

Ive tried the journalling thing but get nervous about someone finding it and reading it. This happened to me when I was 13 when my mom found my journal. It hurt to have to defend/explain my feelings and this just stuck in my mind all these years

[brilliant100]

Photomama - Im so happy for you regarding the scale! Love when that happens.

I have to do some major cleaning cuz my mom is coming for a visit next week. I feel overwhelmed but I will break it down in chunks.