Alcohol Problems

[peanutte]

I know, Lisa! I guess what is becoming clear to me is that even though I'm indifferent to chocolate and candy and cookies and cake, I am a SAVORY carb junkie. I love pizza, pasta with red sauce or cheese, crusty french bread and olive oil, English muffins, bagels with cream cheese...I don't eat that stuff very often, but nevertheless!

[lisayak]

All the above sounds fabulous to me! I've had to eliminate the pasta completely. When I make sauces now, I have them over brown rice, which somehow doesn't drive me to binge. Even pizza is ok for me if I have it with whole grain spelt flour.

THANK GOD there are no bagels worth eating in the UK or I would be in trouble...onion bagel with cream cheese but sadly we have superb French bread and good olive oil!

I've gone off potatoes since low carbing so french fries don't really do it for me.

My sponsor was treated for alcoholism and food addiction and she was taught that white flour and sugar are psychoactive for some people - I'm discovering that's true for me.

Hope you all are well!

[peanutte]

So you know exactly what I'm talking about, Lisa--how come we've necer heard about savory-carb junkies? People nearly always talk in terms of sweets.

Got through my first day of low carbing and I feel a little funny this morning--in a good way. More alert than usual and a little bit buzzy, although I've not had any caffeine. Actually I've switched to decaf when I do have coffee because I truly think caffeine is underestimated as a drug and I know for certain it affects me very strongly.

Lisa, come to think of it, brown rice not only doesn't appeal to me but I could never overdo it on brown rice. Isn't this interesting? The things we have in common?

[seejay]

Peanutte, keep reading. DesMaisons says that strict low carb a la Atkins induction can never heal the serotonin part that is out of balance for an addict in action.

The reason is, one needs an insulin rise to make new serotonin. Some low carb plans, done in ways to never raise insulin, also therefore shut down serotonin production, for some people, according to this theory.

It was true for me and I'm what you're calling a savory carb addict too.

[peanutte]

I'll keep reading, seejay! You are very knowledgable about this stuff. Thanks!

[lisayak]

Originally Posted by peanutte

So you know exactly what I'm talking about, Lisa--how come we've necer heard about savory-carb junkies? People nearly always talk in terms of sweets.

Got through my first day of low carbing and I feel a little funny this morning--in a good way. More alert than usual and a little bit buzzy, although I've not had any caffeine. Actually I've switched to decaf when I do have coffee because I truly think caffeine is underestimated as a drug and I know for certain it affects me very strongly.

Lisa, come to think of it, brown rice not only doesn't appeal to me but I could never overdo it on brown rice. Isn't this interesting? The things we have in common?

It is - I really don't have a sweet tooth. Some of the advice I got when I first stopped drinking was "eating sweets can help curb cravings" but I never craved sugar as a substitute. Actually, I got back on Atkins with a month under my belt lost about 50 pounds over nine months. I think I was craving a stable WOE as well as whole foods.

I also had to give up caffeine last year - it causes heart arrhythmia for me, which makes me anxious and nauseated. I was DEVASTATED, 'cause here I was...gave up the drugs....gave up the alcohol....gave up the carbs...gave up the cigarettes....now I gotta give up my lifeline to consciousness??? It seemed so unfair.

Hands down, it was the worst physical withdrawal I've experienced. I didn't feel right for about six weeks, very sluggish and stupid. My irregular heart beat returned to normal almost immediately, Thank God. Doc said if it didn't I'd be on beta blockers - I'm only 35 - no thanks!

First thing that had to go, though, when I started Atkins, was my bread machine. That was simply too much temptation!

[peanutte]

If I do drink any coffee, which I do maybe once a week, I make it 1/3 regular and 2/3 decaf. Coffee totally wigs me out and I feel like I'm on speed when I drink a few cups of fully caffeinated.

[lisayak]

Yeah, me too. And for some bizarre reason I get really sweaty and really smelly. WTH? I'm soooo tired, nighty-night all!

[lisayak]

Hello all! Hope you're having a pleasant day. Things seem to have eased a bit lately here - I'm feeling so much more cheerful and optimistic.

Rode my bike to and from my meeting tonight, which I really enjoy. I've been surprised by how much I'm enjoying the cycling, which is great 'cause rollerblading isn't possible in rain, and I live in an extremely rainy place!

Best of all, this extra exercise means I'm enjoying my weekly bar of Green & Blacks Maya Gold chocolate with absolutely no guilt....heaven! If you haven't tried it, I definitely recommend it.

At the meeting I saw a woman who has managed a little over a month without alcohol. She looked so healthy, so different from the shaking wreck I first met. Her eyes were clear and bright, skin glowing, and best of all she was so articulate...to think this person was hiding in that drunk all along! I asked her what she did for a living and discovered she was a nursery teacher. I was surprised - the state she was in when she came in led me to believe she didn't have an education. Goes to show exactly what alcohol strips from alcoholics: everything. I love seeing other people recover!

[2bdancing]

I came across this thread some time ago and read the whole thing. I know that I have an addictive nature and wished that I had kept the one on LC and exercise instead of turning to wine every night. I lost my weight in 2001 and my husband was as excited as I was. He took all of my clothes out of the closet and bought me a whole new wardrobe. 7 months later we were seperated. He wanted me to do things that I just couldn't do and I found that he was addicted to porno on the internet. After 24 years of marriage and raising my son I just couldn't believe it. He was the love of my life. He is the one that started me drinking a glass of wine every night; thought it would loosen me up a bit. I didn't drink much before that. I started buying a bottle of wine on Friday for the weekend. Then the bottles got larger so they would last the whole week. Now I buy wine by the carton and that barely lasts a week. I didn't think this was much of a problem until I started counting the number of 8oz glasses I have every night. I finished this weeks box last night. I don't want to buy any more. I have done this before and only go a few days then I buy more. In another thread I read that if you think you have an addiction then you probably do. I guess that struck a nerve. I have a brother who is a recovering drug and acoholic. I just can't call him. He would be so disappointed. Thanks for listening and thank you for the thread.

[lisayak]

Originally Posted by 2bdancing

I came across this thread some time ago and read the whole thing. I know that I have an addictive nature and wished that I had kept the one on LC and exercise instead of turning to wine every night. I lost my weight in 2001 and my husband was as excited as I was. He took all of my clothes out of the closet and bought me a whole new wardrobe. 7 months later we were seperated. He wanted me to do things that I just couldn't do and I found that he was addicted to porno on the internet. After 24 years of marriage and raising my son I just couldn't believe it. He was the love of my life. He is the one that started me drinking a glass of wine every night; thought it would loosen me up a bit. I didn't drink much before that. I started buying a bottle of wine on Friday for the weekend. Then the bottles got larger so they would last the whole week. Now I buy wine by the carton and that barely lasts a week. I didn't think this was much of a problem until I started counting the number of 8oz glasses I have every night. I finished this weeks box last night. I don't want to buy any more. I have done this before and only go a few days then I buy more. In another thread I read that if you think you have an addiction then you probably do. I guess that struck a nerve. I have a brother who is a recovering drug and acoholic. I just can't call him. He would be so disappointed. Thanks for listening and thank you for the thread.

Hi 2bdancing! I'm really glad you've posted - when we're alone with our drinking the problem seems overwhelming. My husband liked me "a little loosened up" as well and has told me since that he feels our marriage was more fun when I drank. And I suppose it was, for him - unfortunately, the alcohol was slowly killing me.

There are loads of ways to stop drinking, and as you've read the posts you'll know that I use AA so that's what I'll speak about. The sense of isolation and loneliness you're feeling, and the unhappiness, obsession and craving that drives you to pick up drink even when you don't want to; people in AA understand that. You won't have to justify your feelings - they know, they've been there. Obviously not every single person in AA is a saint, or even someone you'd like or want to take advice off of, but that's the case in all groups of humans.

As far as your brother is concerned, he probably already knows you're suffering as a result of your drinking and would love to be of help to you, but won't bring it up because he will know from personal experience that you cannot force another person into recovery. They have to choose to recover. I don't know what your relationship is with your brother but if you confide in him, as an alcoholic/addict he will indentify with your pain and surely want to help you get the help you need to stop drinking.

For me, admitting I'm an alcoholic and staying away from the first drink one day at a time has turned my life around completely. I have grown and changed as a person beyond anything I ever thought possible, and it's down to AA and my willingness to change. It's available to you too. Keep posting and keep trying - you will find a way!!!

[2bdancing]

Thank you.

[snoopdebi]

hi , I am hesitant to share my story , I don't want anyone to think badly of me. I have struggled with alcohol most of my adult life, I am now 41. I have also had horrible bouts of depression. Alcohol , of course, exaggerated all of it. I lost jobs, a home, family members, not deceased just sick of me. I finally came to the end of my rope July 31 of 2006. I did something in the heat of the moment in an arguement that was actually a means to an end! I took an overdose of pills, not any pills, I stole from a close family member medication that is lethal, and combined them, I went to bed and just was ready to die I was so tired of being drunk and stupid! I was found near death, I could not move I could hear people around me and could not respond, I felt them put the tube in my nose and and in my mouth, my husband told me that he thought I was dead. He said I was purple. I am so ashamed to talk about it and I know it is the extreme side of depression and alcoholism but I do believe that more people suffer from this thanpeople think.
Since my stay in ICU for 5 days and then of course the wonderful , under lock and key mental unit for 72 hrs, I have changed so much, it was a blessing in disguise, unfortunate as it sounds, I have now been clean and sober for going on 8 months, I quit smoking January 2nd,07, and I do admit I take a strong dose of wellbutrin that has been a wonderful addition to my life, I know alot of people think they don't work but trust me for some , like me , it is life changing and I am so grateful to the people who I dispised in the hospital that really had my best interest at heart, I have been on lo carb since dec. 21,06 and have lost about 27 lbs, I walk daily, which is very mind clearing and relaxing , I have a whole new outlook on life . Many prayers and blessings to all who struggle with this disease, I do not understand why some people can handle alcohol and others can't and I guess that will always be a mystery, I wish you all the best . Thank you for reading this and I hope I did'nt scare anyone, I just told the truth as awful as it is, I truly believe the phrase, whatever does'nt kill you will make you stronger, I am living proof. snoopdeb

[peanutte]

You don't need to apologize or be embarassed, snoopdeb. It took a lot ao courage to get sober and also to share your story with us here! Glad to hear you have found peace and health in your life.

[lisayak]

Hey snoopdeb - No one is going to think badly of you here...most of us have been there.

The link between depression and alcohol use is strong, and scary. I took anti-depressants for 12 years, but never found the source of my depression until I got sober and realised I felt really well - for the first time in more years than I can remember.

Your story is inspirational - thank you for sharing it here. I don't know why I can't drink normally either, but I've stopped caring. Reality is I can't, and once I understood that, life began improving. "Why" really isn't going to add anything to the party now.

God bless and keep in touch!

[snoopdebi]

hi again, I was so scared to come back to this thread and read any responses to my story, I am so glad it is positive feedback, I was second-guessing myself after I submitted it, I hate the way I do that, I am very proud of what I have accomplished in the last 7 1/2 months but I do not want anyone to think I am cocky about it, I was incredibly humbled by my experience. I have a totally different outlook on life , I know that I walk a very thin line between not drinking and drinking and triggers are everywhere. It truly helps to be able to write about this and share with other people that may benefit from it, the nurses and some of the doctor's in the hospital would look at my chart and very bluntly tell me that I was lucky to be alive.I don't think luck has anything to do with it, god has something special for me and I have'nt stumbled onto it yet, anyone who can live thru what I did and have no permanent damage is got to have a guardian angel and be blessed. Thanks for taking the time to read my stuff, ya'll are great!!! Ya I am a southerner ! that ya'll gives it up every time! peace out snoopdebi

[BarbDe]

Hi! You guys have room for one more??
I've been sort of following this thread for a long time now. Thinking about it.
I've made today Day 1 of my alcohol free adventure.
It's going to be rough. I know. Lots going on in life right now. And it's probably just going to get worse here, before it gets better.

Anyway, I can give more info later, if you are interested. Need to get out to work right now. But wanted to commit to this before I start my day.

Wish me strength!

[peanutte]

Go Barb Go!!!

[gofifi]

hi girls - especially peanutte

a few weeks ago I ready EVERY message in this thread and I have especially followed your emails, peanutte, as I think we have much in common.....I tried the moderation thing ...did NOT do an abstinance, but wrote down every one of those teensy drinks and totaled them up - one night I was actually satisfied with two teensy drinks -

but the onther nights varied from three units and up

I notice that a lot of folks said they were going to abstain after the first of the year - but they have disappeared - so I guess they are off sipping cocktails somewhere....coome back!!!!!

I especially remember what John said - he was going to give up the drinkies to get his weight loss jumpstarted...where are you John???? at the bar???

like you peanutte - I had the wine thing going on - and really, if you have two 5 oz glasses of wine before dinner, and one with dinner and (time to stop) that would be considered moderate - however, I do think the sugar/chemistry thing gets the better of us and we need to drink 2 - 4 more glasses before we are anihilated enough to stop..bedtime.

well....my other conscious step was to stop drinking wine because I felt the sugar was compounding the problem. so I have not had wine at home for about 3 weeks - but when I did have some at a party lately it did taste rather sweet...which did not prevent me from having a bunch..if I drink vodka instead (I don't really like the taste) I tend to drink less and more slowly - but I don't really believe that anything vodka has anything to do with anything abstemious.

I have been struggling to lose weight and just can't seem to get it off and keep it off - I lost 20 lbs in 18 months doing a very restrictive low fat vegan regime (Dr. John McDougall) which was very good healthwise as my blood pressure went down to normal without meds - but I just felt that the carbs in that woe were preventing further weight loss

I agree about the carb and alcohol thing being related - they most surely are

if I had my way I would live on pasta and wine....

I met a beautiful, slender young woman some years ago who said that the women in her family were all either alcoholics or obese - she herself had been obese but was on a low carb hi fat diet - she was a shining example of what life without carbs and booze can look like

so - in the interest of health and vanity, I have declared today a no booze day - and I am planning to declare tomorrow one also - ah, yes...fifi does one day at a time "her way"

I just am so tired of believing it's the booze that keeps me overweight - and doing nothing constructive about it..when I last went on the wagon I lost 7 pounds in 7 days....temporary, of course, once I took a cocktail ot two

my problem is not what I eat - I can go for long long periods of times eating zero or low carbs - my problem is not having "respect" for the alcohol I
drink - "IT" is sabotaging my long, hard efforts at weight loss, and frankly, I am tired of losing to this particular enemy

so join me guys - I am not saying I am quitting alcohol - and in my heart of hearts I would prefer to be a moderate drinker - 3 drinks a day 3 days a week
like the say on moderation.org.....but this time I am going to do the abstinence.....one day at a time

[peanutte]

Hi, gofifi! It amazes me that someone can come in here, read ALL the posts, and get a sense of who we are. That's really cool. Thanks for your empathy.

I do it my way too. I don't care what anyone else's agenda is--but I do listen to everyone and take what I can use from ALL sources.

I'm so glad you're here!

[gofifi]

I recognize your intelligence

you are very articulate .....this shines trhough the blank page and I do empathize with you

lost 2 pounds day one - getting through yesterday without a drink really wasn't that difficult

I had several rumless (diet) cokes - they were just fine - I think having the lime helped

had an early dinner and by 8 pm was ready to settle down and watch tv -

its good to feel "normal"

fifi

[BarbDe]

One day down for me.
Wasn't so bad, considering I was slightly hung over anyway and was really thinking about the "hair of the dog" early in the day.
This evening might be rough. We have a late afternoon Dr appointment for DH. He is starting treatment for liver disease that is going to be life altering. He has not had a drink since Thanksgiving. I am so proud of him. Unfortunately I increased the habit in that same time. Sigh.
OK. Well, here's to day 2.
And while I am at it, back to induction for me too!

[gofifi]

day two here and lived to tell about it

there is this show on bbc america (I get it through digital cable) called "turn back your body clock", I think

a doctor uses stat of the art scanning techniques and tells people what their life expectancy actually is and what it should be

needless to say, all the patients are boozers and smokers - some use other drugs - eat badly and take no excerise

after 6 or 8 weeks of doing everything right, no booze, drugs, cigs, - proper diet and exercise, they are able to reverse early signs of disease - and get their BP and blood work vastly improved..

of course they lose 15-30 pounds and they look marvelous

gives one food for thought

I think if you went to www.bbcamerica.com you would find more info

hang in there we can do this

Fifi

[gofifi]

my new slogan - I am not going to think of alcohol of my comforting, dear friend...I am going to think of alcohol as my WORST enemy - one that controls me - I do not control it

bad bad bad booze - "I" want to be in control - not "you"

and folks....NOBODY can be in control with alochol - not even all those sexy hollywood celebreties that end up in rehab!

forget about it!

Fifi

[seejay]

I did moderation for a while. What a waste of time. I didn't get the hit from alcohol so all I was getting was fatter. 2-3 drinks wouldn't do it for me (increasing tolerance).

[gofifi]

its really not that hard - the trick for me is to get through the 6 pm cocktail hour(s)

so I concocted some "mocktails"...diet coke with lime, davinci syrup with soda..de caf coffee with davinci syrup and 2% milk - playing on the "sweet" to replace the alcohol/sugar thing

then start cooking dinner earlier than I normally would - eat a big protein dinner and then have a few more mocktails while watching tv -

fell asleep about 11:30 and woke up at 10:30 - THAT is an improvement over the alcohol induced erratic sleep pattern

good news - down 4 pounds in 2 days - wonderfully motivating - and I feel good and proud of myself, too

fifi