Beyond the Binge (Saturday 5/14/05)

Amc · 05-14-2005, 05:23 AM

Good Morning all! I'll get us started for today.
I see our posting slowed down a little as the weekend approached. I hope that means everyone is involved with some fun activities and is distracted from our constant thoughts of what to eat next.
I'll be doing more yard sale again today! Weather might get into the 60's today.
I'll check in again later.

akmd65 · 05-14-2005, 05:41 AM

good morning.

im so frustrated. i am mad at myself for eating so much and so late. i ate breakfast at 630am, snack at 1030am, lunch 115pm, snack 330pm. i finally ate dinner at 1045 pm and i was so hungry i just ate, and ate. i had every intention to come home and eat some more and then purge...but i didnt. i even stopped at the donut store on the way home and pick up a box to binge with. im taking the box of donuts to my friends house this morning instead. i guess i should be proud i didnt keep on eating when i got home...but im now up to 145.2 pounds. i just hate that i gained that much. i know i couldnt really gain 3 pounds over night and that it is water...but it is still hurting my feelings right now. im going to be very low in carbs today and see how i am later....right now i just feel like curling in a ball and crying. it doesnt help that im so tired. i didnt get home from work until 450 am. its 730 am now. i gotta go pick up my girls.

edited to add: everything i ate last night was legal...small victory.

akmd65 · 05-14-2005, 05:42 AM

amc - good luck with the yard sale!

Im_Rosey · 05-14-2005, 06:03 AM

yes akmd65 you should be proud of yourself. You could have done sooo much damage to yourself but you stopped before you got that far. Take one day at a time. You sound like you are on the right road and hit a little dip is all. Be strong and have a good day.

I have been doing ok. I did go out to eat chinese yestersay but tried to keep the damage small. I think I will be ok.

lowcarbette · 05-14-2005, 06:11 AM

Amc, thanks for getting us started today. Jeannie, you kept things legal, that in itself is an accomplishment. I've been bingeing too so I'm not of much help. Know that I am here rooting for you! I'm Rosey, good to see you.

Let's hope the slow-down on the threads is the weekend and not just everyone thinking "Wow, lots of people binge, reason enough for me to binge!"

Trying to climb back on the wagon...

Amc · 05-14-2005, 06:13 AM

akmd65
It might not just be the quantity of food that you ate but the composition. ie Salty Foods. I have a terrible time with overnight weight gain if I eat salty foods. 2 weekends ago we went to a wedding reception and all they had were munchie type foods, lots of candy and a sundae bar. I had the ham and turkey roll-ups that were cut into 1/2 inch pieces, 4 slices of summer sausage, some shrimp, shrimp/cream cheese dip and some cheese. All in all not much. I gained 3 lbs!!
Be proud of yourself for not eating the doughnuts. That's a huge step. Try to take a nap when you can and you will feel better.

Amc · 05-14-2005, 06:18 AM

Well, I better get going, DH is puttering about the house waiting to get the sale opened up.

Everyone be strong - we can do this!!

kashtana · 05-14-2005, 06:19 AM

Akmd

Be very proud i think it is trmendously hard to stop from binging and purging.Sometimes it feels like out of body expirience.I had a bad night yesterday.My Dh went to play poker and i ate and ate.but the interesting thing happen i did not feel guilty.I just stop at one moment said enough to myself and did not think that tomorrow i have to go on induction ar drink shakes for lunch and dinner.I just deciede to forgive myself and have a very good day not exrteme.it is so big for me.maybe i am turning a new leafe or something.I do hope so.Sorry i did not post the day befor.I have little one and she have been rather demanding and my 7 year old have a broken arm so he need his mommy too.By tthe time night comes i check the boards but do not have mental capability to post...I hope everyone has a healthy and happy weekend.

kacee1958 · 05-14-2005, 06:22 AM

Morning, glories!! Jeannie, you did the best you could at the time, and that is all any of us could do. Friday was good for me - no cheating, no binges. Today, however, may be another story. Mom is coming over this morning to fit a dress she's making me for my cruise. She's sure it won't fit, and to tell you the truth, I am too. She said on the phone last night that it's way too complicated to rip apart and remake, so I told her we'd just put it in the closet and I'd wear something else. Think of me!!

Smythe · 05-14-2005, 06:26 AM

Hi everyone-
Glad I found you. I restarted induction about 3 weeks ago...had fallen off the wagon in Feb. I am close to where I was in my stats so things are going well. I am experiencing some anxiety lately I think due to my impending 44th birthday. It's freaking me out. I usually turn to food to help with my anxiety, but this time I haven't. It's a little strange, but this mid life crisis I seem to be having is making me say..."now or never...I am tired of being old and chubby...I want to be fabulous, and I'm the only one who can do it".

Here's a funny/sad story (to give you some insight on my psyche). The other day at work I was in my classroom when another teacher walked in (he was on his cell phone, but my back was to him so I didn't notice). I heard him say "hey Chubby"...I turned around and said "yeah?". I thought he was calling me!

I cracked up when I saw he was on the phone. We got a good laugh...but how sad that I would think that he wopuld refer to me that way!

idioglossic · 05-14-2005, 06:30 AM

good morning.. you guys are on my mind..

read thru yesterday's thread..

my cheat free days may seem to disqualify me... from this board.. but consider these..

1. I love to be alone with food.. eating alone is my fav .. home or restaurant.. if I have to eat with clients.. I go and eat alone after.. 2 meals..

2. If I am about to eat a meal and someone arrives.. my heart sinks!!!

3. Seeing or reading or hearing about food makes me sweat... and panic.

4. I know I am out of control when I stuff the food into my mouth and gag it down..

5. Abstinence and ketosis are my delievers..

6. I have never binged the way some here have.. but I have thought about it a gazillion times in my live.. I stand infront of food and think about it... once in Washington DC I was almost arrested for drooling from booth to booth in a food court.. I must have been doing it for hours... I think about what people write.. like somewhere here some one spoke of buying the donuts they were sent for and ordered herself a dozed and jammed em down before walking in with the ones sent for... I could taste every one of those and would love to do that... alas we have no donut place on my island.... oh ohoh

just reading about others binges effects me soooo much.. on one of my challenges someone had a thing with peanutbutter... oh oh then I found my self thinking about peanut butter all the time... duh...

am I a binger??? in life... Thank God I have found control... in my heart and dreams
yes yes yes

akmd65 · 05-14-2005, 07:33 AM

[quote=I have been doing ok. I did go out to eat chinese yestersay but tried to keep the damage small. I think I will be ok.[/QUOTE]

awesome on keeping the damage small. what an accomplishment!!

akmd65 · 05-14-2005, 07:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lowcarbette

Let's hope the slow-down on the threads is the weekend and not just everyone thinking "Wow, lots of people binge, reason enough for me to binge!"

Trying to climb back on the wagon...

im really hoping that people arent feeling this way too. it has been really helping me to have people who truely understand.

im climbing on the wagon with you!!!!!!

kacee1958 · 05-14-2005, 07:58 AM

Kashtana - I think you've said as well as anyone else around here - we need to forgive ourselves. Seems most of us have come to terms with the inner demons that drive us to binge . . . now we have to work on nurturing and forgiving ourselves. We ARE worth it.
Idioglossic - only you can define what binging means to you. We'll take you on these boards any way we can get - I for one am learning from your experiences.
One hour til Mom comes.

CurlsNCuffs · 05-14-2005, 08:05 AM

I'm in awe over this thread! I'm not alone - whew - if I make it thru today - it will be my 6th day binge free! Fingers crossed here! I so want to stay on course.

Yesterday -

b - chicken
s - chicen
L - hamburger with mustard
D - chicken breast - boneless,skinless - dipped in a little HV Ranch

Been sipping - oh, hell sometimes gulping the new flavored waters - Aquafina makes some very good ones - Very Berry is my fav! Drinking one right now from Nestle - Strawberry Splash - nice flavor - nothing in it - so it says! Has Splenda in it! Love it!

Haven't eaten anything today - I'm afraid to - what if I do and it sends me on a binge - Hubby is working and I am ALONE! Something about being alone - Cartbabe mentioned that too in one of her posts -

My husband is a Police Officer and he use to work swing shift - sometimes - 4:00P - 12:00A - I hate that shift - he leaves at 2:30 - and then I have the rest of the night - but, he has a new position and it has him working all day work - and NO weekends - that is normally UNHEARD of for POLICE!!!! Probably won't last forever - but, I love it now! And, weekends are a little easier when he's here!

I need to stay strong today! Keep busy! You know I try to convince myself that works - but, he'll I can be driving somewhere to keep my self busy and binge in the car! Argh!

Stay strong my friends - Hugs to all

SusieT · 05-14-2005, 08:10 AM

Good morning I've been busy and have not had time to check this back out I love the name.

Is anyone else a fast eater? I have been like this since a baby my mom said no one else could feed me my bottle cause I would cry. I am working on this but it drives me crazy that I'll eat a meal and then look down and all my food is gone and I don't remember eating it. So I really have to work hard to tell myself to put my fork down.

Another question. Does anyone else here feel more overwhelmed by your binge eating when trying to work on it?

akmd65 · 05-14-2005, 08:13 AM

grrr.....i lost my huge post....

amc...i agree with you. sodium doesnt agree with me usually. and i ate pepperoni, cheese cubes, roast beef in au jus, some sort of baked chicken, green beans with broccoli and yellow squash, and a HUGE ceasar salad with fresh dressing, egg and black olives. overall i ate legal, i just ate enough for three people. have fun today! i hope you make tons of $$$$$.

kastana...how wonderful that you seem to have a handle on things! what a huge accomplishment. how are your kids today? life just isnt any fun when the little ones arent happy.

kacee...im sure you are going to have an amazing dress for your cruise! you will look fab!!! have a fun day with your mom. i sure wish i could stow away in your luggage for the cruise!!!

smythe...hello my fellow teacher!!!! glad you are here. happy early birthday...nice to hear you arent too anxious! 44 is a terrific number!!!!

idioglossic....you are NOT disqualified from this board or any other! im so happy you are able to be cheat free. the feelings that you have are familiar to most of us here. thats why we are here...to help eachother out throught these feelings. you are most welcome!!!!!!!!!

CurlsNCuffs · 05-14-2005, 08:14 AM

I am a fast eater! Oh, my gosh we are sisters! My husband is slow as a turtle! I'm done - wanting to get up and go do other things - I try to slow down - but, I also like my food HOT - he doesn't care if it cools - I hate it. I have to drink my coffee - pipping HOT.

akmd65 · 05-14-2005, 08:19 AM

donna...those new waters are so good! they really help me. im glad you get your hubby home for the weekend! very cool. i know down time, and being alone makes it easier to binge....but you are doing so great!!!!! you are really my inspiration right now!!!

suzy...i eat way too fast. my brain doesnt have a chance to tell my body its full before ive shovled too much food in me. as for your second question...hmmm. it has made me more aware. i think i am almost in a fog of sorts when i begin to binge. ive been much better lately about recognizing the feelings and being able to change my behavior before i lose it completely. last night is my exception...i know not to let myself get too hungry....

akmd65 · 05-14-2005, 08:21 AM

donna...me too! if my coffee cools down i have to zap it or pour a new cup. lol, my kids think im too funny about it!!!

CartBabe · 05-14-2005, 08:33 AM

Good Morning, Sisters!
AMC ~Thanks for getting us started. I hope you have a great day of yard "saling"!
akmd65~Please do not give up or punish yourself today. This is a BRAND new day! ONE DAY AT A TIME! You are a beautiful woman and a survivor! You can do this. I really recommend the book by Geneen Roth called When Food Is Love This book brings much healing by facing the past HOWEVER she very strongly states that CONTROL is exactly what we need to resolve! We are so used to HAVING TO CONTROL SOMETHING that it causes us great pain! I am saying a prayer for you sweetie. I appreciate your presence and encouragement here so much!
Im_Rosey~GOOD MORNING SWEETIE!!!!!!!!!!

Lesley~Good morning to YOU SWEETIE!!!!!!!!! You are my favorite cheerleader, girlie!

Thank you so much for all of the encouragement and time you are sharing with us! We sure do appreciate you!
kashtana~So good to see you. I was just reading your story on the other thread, and so appreciated your candor and willingness to help us grow!
kacee1958~Good MORNING!!!!!

Smythe~Good Morning!!!!

idioglossic~I suppose I could say the same thing....and I think MANY of us here could. I, also have never "cheated" with an illegal food, in 34 months! I would not dream of it, but, I feel that any time I can not STOP eating.....or any time that I eat until it physically hurts....I absolutely MUST call this a binge! I thank you for being here with us and helping us work through this. I honestly believe that the definition of binging is different for all of us. What is important is the underlying "condition". Until we heal from the past, we will never be able to keep off the weight we have lost.
CurlsNCuffs~I am saying a prayer for ya, sweetie. I know right where you are. My Dear hubby leaves for work, and I am like a lost puppy, just wandering to the food bowl, cuz, its somethin to pass the time! YOu can do it! I am so glad you are here with us!
SusieT~Yes, I am a fast eater. Being a nurse makes meals on the run a way of life almost! I have tried to learn to slow it down and enjoy it, though! Yes, some days are VERY overwhelming.....that is why I constantly remind myself ONE DAY AT A TIME! It won't work any other way! I can be doing great one moment and be a huge ball of anxiety the next!
Hey, hugs to you all....I am just so happy to have you as my sisters in this way of life. I appreciate each and every one of you, and am so glad that we can help each other to grow and be strong. LESLEY............your recommending the books by Geneen Roth have changed my life. Thank you. I feel that God brought you to me just to tell me about it!
Hugs to all!
Mary

amadeus4313 · 05-14-2005, 09:03 AM

Good morning, all,

Just checking in quickly this morning. So far so good, but we all know that there are times when things seem effortless - particularly when we are just starting out. Last night I wrote about going out to a Mexican restaurant. Usually, when I have a night where I am not in control of where I'm going to eat, I just chuck it and say "what the hey" I'll start over tomorrow. AFter coming home and writing about it here, I had no desire to binge. I think the fact that we have someone to "talk" to about bingeing is a key to beating this thing. I can't talk about this to DH because he is clueless (and skinny). He has found evidence lately of a couple of my binges and he ridicules it. He isn't trying to be mean, he just doesn't get it - anymore than non-smokers get why it's so hard to quit smoking. Ours isn't a physical attachment to food, it is an emotional one, and since we just can't quit eating, we have to define abstinence for ourselves. Sometimes the line is a fuzzy one and we all have to find it for ourselves.

Anyway, I am grateful for this group. We can come here and tell our stories without fear of ridicule or disgust at our actions.

I am learning to replace all of my negative thoughts with positive ones. I have quit telling myself that I am out of control around food because my pesky little sub-conscious is recording everything I say - and it doesn't discriminate between true and false. So if I tell myself that I am normal around food, and if I do it often enough, my subconscious begins to believe it and I act accordingly. I am also setting daily goals which really helps me keep from being overwhelmed by the bigger picture of how far I have to go.

These are my affirmations for today:

I am in control of my life.

I eat only things that will help me get to my goals.

I set short-term and long-term goals, but my eyes are on the short term goals.

I love to workout and the best feeling in the world is the exhileration after a good workout.

I am setting an example to others, particularly those I love.

Each day I am a little closer to being where I want to be.

Each day is a gift.

Today is mine and it is wonderful!

I am looking forward to getting to know all of you better,
Have a great day, all
MaryM

kashtana · 05-14-2005, 09:07 AM

Akmd65,it did seem from my post that i have a handle on things.But it was just one day it was one of few time when i did not punish myself for binge.It is feels so good not to feel guilty .I just hope i can hold on to this.
My kids are feeling better today.Thank you for asking.

akmd65 · 05-14-2005, 09:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kashtana

Akmd65,it did seem from my post that i have a handle on things.But it was just one day it was one of few time when i did not punish myself for binge.It is feels so good not to feel guilty .I just hope i can hold on to this.
My kids are feeling better today.Thank you for asking.

im sorry i misunderstood! i hope i didnt make you feel like i was insensitive.

i am happy your kids are feeling better!

akmd65 · 05-14-2005, 09:26 AM

marym...i love your post! i am in control of my life.

thank you for sharing this!!!

akmd65 · 05-14-2005, 09:27 AM

mary, thank you. you are so amazing and for you to say such sweet things made me feel hugged.

thank you.

phurst_gal · 05-14-2005, 09:34 AM

Sorry I didn't post yesterday.

Good morning everyone!

re: eating too fast. Yup. That's me too. What I've tried to do lately is stop eating in the middle of a meal. Physically walk away from the plate and do something else for a few minutes (maybe read this board

, water a few plants, go through the mail ...) and then go back to my meal.

Please, no flames, but I'm a little concerned about what some posters consider a binge. Eating too much chicken at dinner is not a binge. Eating too much chicken and then going to McD's for a supersize order of fries and a chocolate shake is. What worries me is that the I binged by eating too much chicken at dinner is the "all or nothing" kind of thinking that leads to real binges.

I'm n

05-14-2005, 05:23 AM	#1
Amc Senior LCF Member Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: West Mich Posts: 143 Gallery: Amc Stats: 184/144.8/133 restart 190.6/177/135 WOE: Low Carb Start Date: June 2, 2003 1/3/2008	Beyond the Binge (Saturday 5/14/05) Good Morning all! I'll get us started for today. I see our posting slowed down a little as the weekend approached. I hope that means everyone is involved with some fun activities and is distracted from our constant thoughts of what to eat next. I'll be doing more yard sale again today! Weather might get into the 60's today. I'll check in again later.

05-14-2005, 05:41 AM	#2
akmd65 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: South Jersey, but always a Texan Posts: 1,775 Gallery: akmd65 Stats: 4x to 4/6 in three years WOE: south beach - phase one	good morning. im so frustrated. i am mad at myself for eating so much and so late. i ate breakfast at 630am, snack at 1030am, lunch 115pm, snack 330pm. i finally ate dinner at 1045 pm and i was so hungry i just ate, and ate. i had every intention to come home and eat some more and then purge...but i didnt. i even stopped at the donut store on the way home and pick up a box to binge with. im taking the box of donuts to my friends house this morning instead. i guess i should be proud i didnt keep on eating when i got home...but im now up to 145.2 pounds. i just hate that i gained that much. i know i couldnt really gain 3 pounds over night and that it is water...but it is still hurting my feelings right now. im going to be very low in carbs today and see how i am later....right now i just feel like curling in a ball and crying. it doesnt help that im so tired. i didnt get home from work until 450 am. its 730 am now. i gotta go pick up my girls. edited to add: everything i ate last night was legal...small victory. __________________ Jeannie 25 pounds until goal!! Last edited by akmd65 : 05-14-2005 at 05:43 AM.

05-14-2005, 06:19 AM	#8
kashtana Senior LCF Member Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: D.C. area Posts: 266 Gallery: kashtana Stats: 159/129/130 WOE: low carb,mix Start Date: 04/01/04	Akmd Be very proud i think it is trmendously hard to stop from binging and purging.Sometimes it feels like out of body expirience.I had a bad night yesterday.My Dh went to play poker and i ate and ate.but the interesting thing happen i did not feel guilty.I just stop at one moment said enough to myself and did not think that tomorrow i have to go on induction ar drink shakes for lunch and dinner.I just deciede to forgive myself and have a very good day not exrteme.it is so big for me.maybe i am turning a new leafe or something.I do hope so.Sorry i did not post the day befor.I have little one and she have been rather demanding and my 7 year old have a broken arm so he need his mommy too.By tthe time night comes i check the boards but do not have mental capability to post...I hope everyone has a healthy and happy weekend. __________________ 159/148/143.5/141.5/140.5/138.5/135/132

05-14-2005, 06:22 AM	#9
kacee1958 Senior LCF Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: NE Georgia Posts: 537 Gallery: kacee1958 Stats: 198/188/145 WOE: Atkins Start Date: restart 09/15/08	Morning, glories!! Jeannie, you did the best you could at the time, and that is all any of us could do. Friday was good for me - no cheating, no binges. Today, however, may be another story. Mom is coming over this morning to fit a dress she's making me for my cruise. She's sure it won't fit, and to tell you the truth, I am too. She said on the phone last night that it's way too complicated to rip apart and remake, so I told her we'd just put it in the closet and I'd wear something else. Think of me!! __________________ kacee

05-14-2005, 06:30 AM	#11
idioglossic Big Yapper!!!! Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Virgin Islands Posts: 9,700 Gallery: idioglossic Stats: 172/132/125 5'2" WOE: Stillmans, low carb, low fat, low sodium, 2 meals Start Date: August 29, 2004	good morning.. you guys are on my mind.. read thru yesterday's thread.. my cheat free days may seem to disqualify me... from this board.. but consider these.. 1. I love to be alone with food.. eating alone is my fav .. home or restaurant.. if I have to eat with clients.. I go and eat alone after.. 2 meals.. 2. If I am about to eat a meal and someone arrives.. my heart sinks!!! 3. Seeing or reading or hearing about food makes me sweat... and panic. 4. I know I am out of control when I stuff the food into my mouth and gag it down.. 5. Abstinence and ketosis are my delievers.. 6. I have never binged the way some here have.. but I have thought about it a gazillion times in my live.. I stand infront of food and think about it... once in Washington DC I was almost arrested for drooling from booth to booth in a food court.. I must have been doing it for hours... I think about what people write.. like somewhere here some one spoke of buying the donuts they were sent for and ordered herself a dozed and jammed em down before walking in with the ones sent for... I could taste every one of those and would love to do that... alas we have no donut place on my island.... oh ohoh just reading about others binges effects me soooo much.. on one of my challenges someone had a thing with peanutbutter... oh oh then I found my self thinking about peanut butter all the time... duh... am I a binger??? in life... Thank God I have found control... in my heart and dreams yes yes yes __________________ God made me a hunter gatherer.. I was not suppose to find much.. Waiting it off! GOAL of 120 6/6/05 GOAL 135 12/17/04 30 LB CLUB 11/25/04 40 LB CLUB 1/14/05 50 LB CLUB 5/16/05 60 LB CLUB 8/19/05 729 CHEAT FREE DAYS THE ONLY PERSON I WAS FOOLING WAS MYSELF!!! *The Sayonara CARBOnara Challenge Colonel* GOAL "we need to love ourselves enough to give up entitlement thinking and start thinking in terms of what we need to do in order to be healthy." - Terry** Lowered goal to 120 1/10/05

05-14-2005, 05:42 AM	#3
akmd65 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: South Jersey, but always a Texan Posts: 1,775 Gallery: akmd65 Stats: 4x to 4/6 in three years WOE: south beach - phase one	amc - good luck with the yard sale!

05-14-2005, 06:03 AM	#4
Im_Rosey Senior LCF Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Iowa Posts: 107 Gallery: Im_Rosey	yes akmd65 you should be proud of yourself. You could have done sooo much damage to yourself but you stopped before you got that far. Take one day at a time. You sound like you are on the right road and hit a little dip is all. Be strong and have a good day. I have been doing ok. I did go out to eat chinese yestersay but tried to keep the damage small. I think I will be ok.

05-14-2005, 06:11 AM	#5
lowcarbette Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Home of the Hawkeyes Posts: 4,300 Gallery: lowcarbette Stats: (Pregnancy high 200#) 162/115 WOE: Atkins	Amc, thanks for getting us started today. Jeannie, you kept things legal, that in itself is an accomplishment. I've been bingeing too so I'm not of much help. Know that I am here rooting for you! I'm Rosey, good to see you. Let's hope the slow-down on the threads is the weekend and not just everyone thinking "Wow, lots of people binge, reason enough for me to binge!" Trying to climb back on the wagon...

05-14-2005, 06:13 AM	#6
Amc Senior LCF Member Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: West Mich Posts: 143 Gallery: Amc Stats: 184/144.8/133 restart 190.6/177/135 WOE: Low Carb Start Date: June 2, 2003 1/3/2008	akmd65 It might not just be the quantity of food that you ate but the composition. ie Salty Foods. I have a terrible time with overnight weight gain if I eat salty foods. 2 weekends ago we went to a wedding reception and all they had were munchie type foods, lots of candy and a sundae bar. I had the ham and turkey roll-ups that were cut into 1/2 inch pieces, 4 slices of summer sausage, some shrimp, shrimp/cream cheese dip and some cheese. All in all not much. I gained 3 lbs!! Be proud of yourself for not eating the doughnuts. That's a huge step. Try to take a nap when you can and you will feel better.

05-14-2005, 06:18 AM	#7
Amc Senior LCF Member Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: West Mich Posts: 143 Gallery: Amc Stats: 184/144.8/133 restart 190.6/177/135 WOE: Low Carb Start Date: June 2, 2003 1/3/2008	Well, I better get going, DH is puttering about the house waiting to get the sale opened up. Everyone be strong - we can do this!!

05-14-2005, 06:26 AM	#10
Smythe MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: New York Posts: 2,727 Gallery: Smythe Stats: here we go again 10/8/4-6 WOE: Atkins Start Date: August 2004 Goal Nov 2005 reinducting 1/2008	Hi everyone- Glad I found you. I restarted induction about 3 weeks ago...had fallen off the wagon in Feb. I am close to where I was in my stats so things are going well. I am experiencing some anxiety lately I think due to my impending 44th birthday. It's freaking me out. I usually turn to food to help with my anxiety, but this time I haven't. It's a little strange, but this mid life crisis I seem to be having is making me say..."now or never...I am tired of being old and chubby...I want to be fabulous, and I'm the only one who can do it". Here's a funny/sad story (to give you some insight on my psyche). The other day at work I was in my classroom when another teacher walked in (he was on his cell phone, but my back was to him so I didn't notice). I heard him say "hey Chubby"...I turned around and said "yeah?". I thought he was calling me! I cracked up when I saw he was on the phone. We got a good laugh...but how sad that I would think that he wopuld refer to me that way!

05-14-2005, 07:33 AM	#12
akmd65 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: South Jersey, but always a Texan Posts: 1,775 Gallery: akmd65 Stats: 4x to 4/6 in three years WOE: south beach - phase one	[quote=I have been doing ok. I did go out to eat chinese yestersay but tried to keep the damage small. I think I will be ok.[/QUOTE] awesome on keeping the damage small. what an accomplishment!!

05-14-2005, 07:58 AM	#14
kacee1958 Senior LCF Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: NE Georgia Posts: 537 Gallery: kacee1958 Stats: 198/188/145 WOE: Atkins Start Date: restart 09/15/08	Kashtana - I think you've said as well as anyone else around here - we need to forgive ourselves. Seems most of us have come to terms with the inner demons that drive us to binge . . . now we have to work on nurturing and forgiving ourselves. We ARE worth it. Idioglossic - only you can define what binging means to you. We'll take you on these boards any way we can get - I for one am learning from your experiences. One hour til Mom comes.

05-14-2005, 08:05 AM	#15
CurlsNCuffs MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 2,345 Gallery: CurlsNCuffs Stats: 240/147/125 WOE: Atkins Start Date: April 2, 2003	I'm in awe over this thread! I'm not alone - whew - if I make it thru today - it will be my 6th day binge free! Fingers crossed here! I so want to stay on course. Yesterday - b - chicken s - chicen L - hamburger with mustard D - chicken breast - boneless,skinless - dipped in a little HV Ranch Been sipping - oh, hell sometimes gulping the new flavored waters - Aquafina makes some very good ones - Very Berry is my fav! Drinking one right now from Nestle - Strawberry Splash - nice flavor - nothing in it - so it says! Has Splenda in it! Love it! Haven't eaten anything today - I'm afraid to - what if I do and it sends me on a binge - Hubby is working and I am ALONE! Something about being alone - Cartbabe mentioned that too in one of her posts - My husband is a Police Officer and he use to work swing shift - sometimes - 4:00P - 12:00A - I hate that shift - he leaves at 2:30 - and then I have the rest of the night - but, he has a new position and it has him working all day work - and NO weekends - that is normally UNHEARD of for POLICE!!!! Probably won't last forever - but, I love it now! And, weekends are a little easier when he's here! I need to stay strong today! Keep busy! You know I try to convince myself that works - but, he'll I can be driving somewhere to keep my self busy and binge in the car! Argh! Stay strong my friends - Hugs to all Last edited by CurlsNCuffs : 05-14-2005 at 08:06 AM.

05-14-2005, 08:10 AM	#16
SusieT Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Monaca, Pa Posts: 13,397 Gallery: SusieT	Good morning I've been busy and have not had time to check this back out I love the name. Is anyone else a fast eater? I have been like this since a baby my mom said no one else could feed me my bottle cause I would cry. I am working on this but it drives me crazy that I'll eat a meal and then look down and all my food is gone and I don't remember eating it. So I really have to work hard to tell myself to put my fork down. Another question. Does anyone else here feel more overwhelmed by your binge eating when trying to work on it? __________________ SusieT 4-23-01 330+/220. /? ~110 ~pounds gone~! One Day At A Time!

05-14-2005, 08:13 AM	#17
akmd65 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: South Jersey, but always a Texan Posts: 1,775 Gallery: akmd65 Stats: 4x to 4/6 in three years WOE: south beach - phase one	grrr.....i lost my huge post.... amc...i agree with you. sodium doesnt agree with me usually. and i ate pepperoni, cheese cubes, roast beef in au jus, some sort of baked chicken, green beans with broccoli and yellow squash, and a HUGE ceasar salad with fresh dressing, egg and black olives. overall i ate legal, i just ate enough for three people. have fun today! i hope you make tons of $$$$$. kastana...how wonderful that you seem to have a handle on things! what a huge accomplishment. how are your kids today? life just isnt any fun when the little ones arent happy. kacee...im sure you are going to have an amazing dress for your cruise! you will look fab!!! have a fun day with your mom. i sure wish i could stow away in your luggage for the cruise!!! smythe...hello my fellow teacher!!!! glad you are here. happy early birthday...nice to hear you arent too anxious! 44 is a terrific number!!!! idioglossic....you are NOT disqualified from this board or any other! im so happy you are able to be cheat free. the feelings that you have are familiar to most of us here. thats why we are here...to help eachother out throught these feelings. you are most welcome!!!!!!!!!

05-14-2005, 08:14 AM	#18
CurlsNCuffs MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 2,345 Gallery: CurlsNCuffs Stats: 240/147/125 WOE: Atkins Start Date: April 2, 2003	I am a fast eater! Oh, my gosh we are sisters! My husband is slow as a turtle! I'm done - wanting to get up and go do other things - I try to slow down - but, I also like my food HOT - he doesn't care if it cools - I hate it. I have to drink my coffee - pipping HOT.

05-14-2005, 08:19 AM	#19
akmd65 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: South Jersey, but always a Texan Posts: 1,775 Gallery: akmd65 Stats: 4x to 4/6 in three years WOE: south beach - phase one	donna...those new waters are so good! they really help me. im glad you get your hubby home for the weekend! very cool. i know down time, and being alone makes it easier to binge....but you are doing so great!!!!! you are really my inspiration right now!!! suzy...i eat way too fast. my brain doesnt have a chance to tell my body its full before ive shovled too much food in me. as for your second question...hmmm. it has made me more aware. i think i am almost in a fog of sorts when i begin to binge. ive been much better lately about recognizing the feelings and being able to change my behavior before i lose it completely. last night is my exception...i know not to let myself get too hungry....

05-14-2005, 08:21 AM	#20
akmd65 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: South Jersey, but always a Texan Posts: 1,775 Gallery: akmd65 Stats: 4x to 4/6 in three years WOE: south beach - phase one	donna...me too! if my coffee cools down i have to zap it or pour a new cup. lol, my kids think im too funny about it!!!

05-14-2005, 08:33 AM	#21
CartBabe MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Albuquerque, New Mexico Posts: 2,665 Gallery: CartBabe WOE: Low carb/low calorie	Good Morning, Sisters! AMC ~Thanks for getting us started. I hope you have a great day of yard "saling"! akmd65~Please do not give up or punish yourself today. This is a BRAND new day! ONE DAY AT A TIME! You are a beautiful woman and a survivor! You can do this. I really recommend the book by Geneen Roth called When Food Is Love This book brings much healing by facing the past HOWEVER she very strongly states that CONTROL is exactly what we need to resolve! We are so used to HAVING TO CONTROL SOMETHING that it causes us great pain! I am saying a prayer for you sweetie. I appreciate your presence and encouragement here so much! Im_Rosey~GOOD MORNING SWEETIE!!!!!!!!!! Lesley~Good morning to YOU SWEETIE!!!!!!!!! You are my favorite cheerleader, girlie! Thank you so much for all of the encouragement and time you are sharing with us! We sure do appreciate you! kashtana~So good to see you. I was just reading your story on the other thread, and so appreciated your candor and willingness to help us grow! kacee1958~Good MORNING!!!!! Smythe~Good Morning!!!! idioglossic~I suppose I could say the same thing....and I think MANY of us here could. I, also have never "cheated" with an illegal food, in 34 months! I would not dream of it, but, I feel that any time I can not STOP eating.....or any time that I eat until it physically hurts....I absolutely MUST call this a binge! I thank you for being here with us and helping us work through this. I honestly believe that the definition of binging is different for all of us. What is important is the underlying "condition". Until we heal from the past, we will never be able to keep off the weight we have lost. CurlsNCuffs~I am saying a prayer for ya, sweetie. I know right where you are. My Dear hubby leaves for work, and I am like a lost puppy, just wandering to the food bowl, cuz, its somethin to pass the time! YOu can do it! I am so glad you are here with us! SusieT~Yes, I am a fast eater. Being a nurse makes meals on the run a way of life almost! I have tried to learn to slow it down and enjoy it, though! Yes, some days are VERY overwhelming.....that is why I constantly remind myself ONE DAY AT A TIME! It won't work any other way! I can be doing great one moment and be a huge ball of anxiety the next! Hey, hugs to you all....I am just so happy to have you as my sisters in this way of life. I appreciate each and every one of you, and am so glad that we can help each other to grow and be strong. LESLEY............your recommending the books by Geneen Roth have changed my life. Thank you. I feel that God brought you to me just to tell me about it! Hugs to all! Mary Last edited by CartBabe : 05-14-2005 at 08:36 AM.

05-14-2005, 09:03 AM	#22
amadeus4313 Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Beautiful mid-Michigan Posts: 3,148 Blog Entries: 2 Gallery: amadeus4313	Good morning, all, Just checking in quickly this morning. So far so good, but we all know that there are times when things seem effortless - particularly when we are just starting out. Last night I wrote about going out to a Mexican restaurant. Usually, when I have a night where I am not in control of where I'm going to eat, I just chuck it and say "what the hey" I'll start over tomorrow. AFter coming home and writing about it here, I had no desire to binge. I think the fact that we have someone to "talk" to about bingeing is a key to beating this thing. I can't talk about this to DH because he is clueless (and skinny). He has found evidence lately of a couple of my binges and he ridicules it. He isn't trying to be mean, he just doesn't get it - anymore than non-smokers get why it's so hard to quit smoking. Ours isn't a physical attachment to food, it is an emotional one, and since we just can't quit eating, we have to define abstinence for ourselves. Sometimes the line is a fuzzy one and we all have to find it for ourselves. Anyway, I am grateful for this group. We can come here and tell our stories without fear of ridicule or disgust at our actions. I am learning to replace all of my negative thoughts with positive ones. I have quit telling myself that I am out of control around food because my pesky little sub-conscious is recording everything I say - and it doesn't discriminate between true and false. So if I tell myself that I am normal around food, and if I do it often enough, my subconscious begins to believe it and I act accordingly. I am also setting daily goals which really helps me keep from being overwhelmed by the bigger picture of how far I have to go. These are my affirmations for today: I am in control of my life. I eat only things that will help me get to my goals. I set short-term and long-term goals, but my eyes are on the short term goals. I love to workout and the best feeling in the world is the exhileration after a good workout. I am setting an example to others, particularly those I love. Each day I am a little closer to being where I want to be. Each day is a gift. Today is mine and it is wonderful! I am looking forward to getting to know all of you better, Have a great day, all MaryM __________________ My Blog: Musings from the Sugar Bush

05-14-2005, 09:07 AM	#23
kashtana Senior LCF Member Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: D.C. area Posts: 266 Gallery: kashtana Stats: 159/129/130 WOE: low carb,mix Start Date: 04/01/04	Akmd65,it did seem from my post that i have a handle on things.But it was just one day it was one of few time when i did not punish myself for binge.It is feels so good not to feel guilty .I just hope i can hold on to this. My kids are feeling better today.Thank you for asking.

05-14-2005, 09:26 AM	#25
akmd65 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: South Jersey, but always a Texan Posts: 1,775 Gallery: akmd65 Stats: 4x to 4/6 in three years WOE: south beach - phase one	marym...i love your post! i am in control of my life. thank you for sharing this!!!

05-14-2005, 09:27 AM	#26
akmd65 MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: South Jersey, but always a Texan Posts: 1,775 Gallery: akmd65 Stats: 4x to 4/6 in three years WOE: south beach - phase one	mary, thank you. you are so amazing and for you to say such sweet things made me feel hugged. thank you.