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Old 05-08-2008, 11:00 AM   #1
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All you non-alcoholics..

How do you live everyday without having a drink? What do you do in the evenings that dont cause you to have that urge? How do you even just exist without it? Seriously.
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:02 AM   #2
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Hi Babsy,
I think that if a person isn't used to consuming alcohol every day then it is a non-issue. But a person that does it daily and is addicted to it, they can't understand how a person could live without it.

This thread makes me sad Babsy- especially given your diabetes issues.

Take care of yourself please. Said in all seriousness and sincerity with zero smart-mouth, I promise.
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:07 AM   #3
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I am scared too. Thats why I am asking. I would like to attempt it. Cause I know it is getting in the way. When I do drink in the evenings, I tend to eat carby things which raises my sugar in the morning and througout the day and then I dont take my pills at night like I am supposed to and when my sugar is high in the morning I have to take the insulin. I want to stop the insulin and I think if I stopped drinking I could possible do so. I was drinking the other night and happened to check my blood sugar at night before I went to bed and it was in the 30's. That time was definately caused by the alcohol. I think I am scared enough now. I need some advice on what I can do to keep my mind off of it.
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:11 AM   #4
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It will be 4 weeks of sobriety tomorrow for me. Will I ever take another drink? I have no idea but I take one day at a time.

I hope you find your way and remove yourself from any kind of temptation.

This means avoiding bars and clubs and friends that drink to excess.

Going to AA is a personal choice by the way.

Last edited by LoraJR72 : 05-08-2008 at 11:15 AM.
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:12 AM   #5
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Aw Babsy. OK I think you are admitting you are an alcoholic (because your thread is titled 'hey all you non-alcoholics'...

Have you considered joining Alcoholics Anonymous? THEY will surely be able to help you through it.
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:15 AM   #6
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It will be 4 weeks of sobriety tomorrow for me. Will I ever take another drink? I have no idea but I take one day at a time.
congratulations, I am proud. But usually when some one says that to me it bothers me cause then I feel if i take another drink I will let them down and I like to feel that I am doing it for me not anyone else. But, I dont mean for you to feel that way just saying how it does me.
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:17 AM   #7
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I mean when someone tells me that they are proud of me like I told you. Just wanted to clarify
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:18 AM   #8
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Aw Babsy. OK I think you are admitting you are an alcoholic (because your thread is titled 'hey all you non-alcoholics'...

Have you considered joining Alcoholics Anonymous? THEY will surely be able to help you through it.

oh definately, I aint denying it
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:19 AM   #9
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Alcoholics Anonymous :

I lived with an alcoholic man for 7yrs. It is the hardest thing in the world to admit and it is even harder to overcome, but it is so worth it. Life is way too short not to be happy and live life to its fullest potential hun. You can do it and you have to want to do this for yourself. I send many blessings and hugs to you.
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:21 AM   #10
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I know that doing low carb can make me crave alcohol because of the sugar. I (until recently) drank heavily (10-14 drinks a day 5 nights a week for about 2 years). A LOT.

I started going to Overeaters Anon. because food addiction has always been my #1. Going to the meetings and going to the gym (NOT staying at home being lonely, bored, etc.) and NOT putting myself in situations where there is booze around.

My best friend's dad is diabetic and an alcoholic and recently went the the doctor's and they said, "John, you can have a beer, or you can have your feet." He's been sober for about 45 days now (after drinking 12-18 beers a day for about 30 years, and although he's doing great, he's isolated and will need support soon.

Good luck. I know that programs can be a bummer but so is your life/health not working the way you want it to be.

Get out of the house and good luck! You've probably dealt with a lot more in your life and you can get past this.
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:23 AM   #11
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Originally Posted by KINDERHORE View Post
I know that doing low carb can make me crave alcohol because of the sugar. I (until recently) drank heavily (10-14 drinks a day 5 nights a week for about 2 years). A LOT.

I started going to Overeaters Anon. because food addiction has always been my #1. Going to the meetings and going to the gym (NOT staying at home being lonely, bored, etc.) and NOT putting myself in situations where there is booze around.

My best friend's dad is diabetic and an alcoholic and recently went the the doctor's and they said, "John, you can have a beer, or you can have your feet." He's been sober for about 45 days now (after drinking 12-18 beers a day for about 30 years, and although he's doing great, he's isolated and will need support soon.

Good luck. I know that programs can be a bummer but so is your life/health not working the way you want it to be.

Get out of the house and good luck! You've probably dealt with a lot more in your life and you can get past this.
isolated? what do you mean
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:32 AM   #12
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I mean he right now is sitting at home, not talking to his regular social circle because they all drink or know him as a drinker. He also is not around anyone who is going through what he's going through or anyone who knows anything about it.

He's going to get bored and restless with his routine of just staying away and he's going to fall off the wagon unless he finds some people who can off him some support and healthy friendship.
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:33 AM   #13
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I mean he right now is sitting at home, not talking to his regular social circle because they all drink or know him as a drinker. He also is not around anyone who is going through what he's going through or anyone who knows anything about it.

He's going to get bored and restless with his routine of just staying away and he's going to fall off the wagon unless he finds some people who can off him some support and healthy friendship.
exactly
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:33 AM   #14
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thats exactly what I mean. Its boring not doing it. BORRINNG
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:35 AM   #15
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congratulations, I am proud. But usually when some one says that to me it bothers me cause then I feel if i take another drink I will let them down and I like to feel that I am doing it for me not anyone else. But, I dont mean for you to feel that way just saying how it does me.
If you're drinking causes harm to others than yes, it is considered a disappointment to people if you drink. You will find yourself in vicious cycle of drinking (then eating lots of crap) and non-drinking (cutting calories to make up for your high carbo-holic alcholic evenings). Depression sets in! Believe me I thought Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous would help me with my 2 to 3 addictions at once. They use the 12 Steps as AA does. I wasn't happy with my sponsor and the meetings and phone calls to other FA members were driving me batty. I really hope you find your way and believe your answer is not found at the bottom of a glass or end of a bottle.

I need to seek help through AA/NA for my other addictions and it will be a long road ahead.
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:36 AM   #16
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Edit:
For ME it's willpower to NOT have the drink after a bad day or experience.

Last edited by slatman : 05-08-2008 at 12:11 PM.
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:38 AM   #17
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Hey there,

I'm fourteen months sober. AA and sobriety have changed my life 100%. Its impossible to describe. I definately definatley recommend checking out a meeting. What do you have to lose?
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:40 AM   #18
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Well...Just like dieting, to say that it's pure willpower does a couple of things:

1. ignores the fact that you need to work on the cause of the drinking (try not drinking.eating/ etc for a few hours/days, etc and see what kinds of feelings you feel you have to fight off that come up rather than deal with them.

2. Makes you feel like you're a complete failure because you "didn't have enough willpower" if you slip up. And just like with eating, you just go out and eat some more because, you know, the damage is done...
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:41 AM   #19
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It's willpower... serious willpower and it is tough to do alone.
as non-argumentatively as possible: it has NOTHING to do with willpower. Willpower alone can never keep a real alcoholic sober. Never.

ETA: According to what is taught by AA - which is what I as a recovered alcoholic believe 100%
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Old 05-08-2008, 11:48 AM   #20
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My last illegal drug was June 1976. My last cigerrette was March 1980. My last drink was Thanksgiving 1993...

My tips:

Make a decision, make it firm and then stick to it no matter what. Don't leave any room for maybe's on the subject.

Good Luck!
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Old 05-08-2008, 12:01 PM   #21
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As a nurse I've seen what alcohol does to people long term (organ failure, dementia) and as an ex-wife I've seen what alcohol has done to my children and my ex-husband. You are a beautiful woman Babsy. You can choose to continue on as you have before, or you can choose to find the strength to battle this addiction. It IS within you.

As for how us non-alcoholics spend our time? I work, I play with my young son, I collect recipes, I sew, I watch Food Network & HGTV sometimes, I window shop, I take classes on the internet, I'm filling hope chests with all sorts of stuff for when my big kids get married. It really isn't about what you do... it's more about who you do it with. If you associate with drinkers, you'll sooner or later find yourself drinking too. Are the people you drink with "real" friends anyway? Or are they just people that you have drinking in common with? If they really are good friends or family then spend time with them in non-drinking situations only. Trust me, if you're out there doing things that don't revolve around alcohol, you'll find many friends and create new circles.

Good luck to you. You CAN choose a healthier life.
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Old 05-08-2008, 12:02 PM   #22
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I hate terms like alcoholic. It sounds so defeated to me. But in all candor, I definitely have control issues. So I made the decision 18 years ago to stop completely. So now I just think of myself as a non-drinker. US society has become quite accepting of this. The only place I've been met with astonishment was England. "Don't drink? what do you mean? it's just a pint!"

I'm good at all or nothing. Same with sugar.

Now as to the question "what do I do" - well in the evenings I exercise, I practice guitar, I cook and converse with my family, I make love to my wife. Each and every one of these things is better without a drink. I save $10 a day and that'll buy a massage every 9 days.

If you drink every day, then forget labeling it, but you have a problem. I'm a successful business man, have a great 26 year long marriage, have kids to be proud of, I am in great health. I know with a certainty that if I hadn't quit when I did, I would have none of these today.

Good luck and hang tough.
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Old 05-08-2008, 12:06 PM   #23
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save $10 a day and that'll buy a massage every 9 days.
hahahahaha! That's awesome!
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Old 05-08-2008, 12:06 PM   #24
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Originally Posted by KINDERHORE View Post
Well...Just like dieting, to say that it's pure willpower does a couple of things:

1. ignores the fact that you need to work on the cause of the drinking (try not drinking.eating/ etc for a few hours/days, etc and see what kinds of feelings you feel you have to fight off that come up rather than deal with them.

2. Makes you feel like you're a complete failure because you "didn't have enough willpower" if you slip up. And just like with eating, you just go out and eat some more because, you know, the damage is done...
I am not an alcoholic, but I totally agree with this statement, as the same concept holds true to a food addict, which I am.
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Old 05-08-2008, 12:08 PM   #25
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Babsy look at all the people on this thread who 100% know exactly where you are right now! See?

Praying that you look into AA. For your health and well being.
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Old 05-08-2008, 12:16 PM   #26
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As a nurse I've seen what alcohol does to people long term (organ failure, dementia) and as an ex-wife I've seen what alcohol has done to my children and my ex-husband. You are a beautiful woman Babsy. You can choose to continue on as you have before, or you can choose to find the strength to battle this addiction. It IS within you.

As for how us non-alcoholics spend our time? I work, I play with my young son, I collect recipes, I sew, I watch Food Network & HGTV sometimes, I window shop, I take classes on the internet, I'm filling hope chests with all sorts of stuff for when my big kids get married. It really isn't about what you do... it's more about who you do it with. If you associate with drinkers, you'll sooner or later find yourself drinking too. Are the people you drink with "real" friends anyway? Or are they just people that you have drinking in common with? If they really are good friends or family then spend time with them in non-drinking situations only. Trust me, if you're out there doing things that don't revolve around alcohol, you'll find many friends and create new circles.

Good luck to you. You CAN choose a healthier life.

thanks for that compliment. It really made me think, yes I am. Too much to shorten my life
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Old 05-08-2008, 12:20 PM   #27
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I live alone and have not had a drink in 6 months or cigarette (come July) in 5 years. Crazy as it sounds, giving these things up was most difficult when it came to just filling time....and that's what my addictions have always been about, filling up time because of loneliness, boredom, etc etc. I didnt know what to do with myself when I quit smoking ( I was a two pack a day 'er, three on a weekend with drinks! ) so I started a paint by numbers kit! I know, it sounds dumb, but it gave me something to do, I could place it in front of the TV or wherever I wanted to be. Later, I began going to writing groups and other group activities that got me out of the house and socializing. I didn't realize what