Any suicide survivors here?

[RoseWaddles]

I would like to talk to someone who has been there.

[Houston Heather]

I'm from the other side. When I started thinking about it all the time, I sought help.

My meds work great but it took over 25 years to get an accurate diagnosis (bipolar).

I'm sorry that happened to you. The pain was so terrible I would have done anything to end it. In my mind, only one thing would end it. I really felt like an animal in a trap, contemplating gnawing off a limb. It's so awful you can't see outside it or even think about how it will affect others.

I told my husband one day "We could win the lottery and I'd still want to die."

[jedswife]

my stepson committed suicide as well as 2 of my uncles - it was devastating - there will be many "what if's" - everyone close to him will likely feel some blame and guilt. it does get easier over time but not a day goes by that i dont think of it. it was very hard on my kids to lose their brother that way - one of my kids was old enough to know what actually happened the other was only 6 at the time and still does not know the truth of how his brother died - i will eventually tell him but he is still not old enough to understand it. my daughter who was almost 18 when died knew and she really had a hard time dealing with it because it was so out of character - he had never seemed depressed never gave any hint of what was to come. we can only assume it was due to him being drunk and breaking up with his girlfriend - but it still does not make sense as he had a previous livein girlfriend who he was with for years that cheated on him and he had no problems that we could see. the truth is we will never know what actually caused this. best of luck to you and yours. the best advice i can give is to talk about it and let it out.

[jedswife]

pm if you'd like to talk about it.

[Tea Cozy]

Yes, I've been there, on several fronts.

My best friend hauled all his belongings out to the dumpster, doused it - and himself - and lit a match. I stood by and watched as he did it all. I knew I couldn't get him to help himself, so I waited until he did it and called 911.

He was fortunate, in that he got help from that, and has been on a better path.

Myself, I went through a bad patch and got my hands on a razor blade. One of my professors discovered me in the bathroom at school while unconcious. If she hadn't, I wouldn't have made it.

I also had a cousin who tried, and succeeded.

Feel free to respond or PM if you want to talk.

[Sweetpea]

My brother 6 monts ago -- Took a bottle of Xanax --- I am still having a very hard time with it.

[Lina2]

Yeah, been there. I came from an abusive childhood home, and began contemplating suicide as a young girl. I finally tried it in high school, and again a few years later.

I sometimes can sink into that same morass of hopelessness. The difference is that since I had a personal encounter with God, my life no longer belongs to me. I can't help but think about how it would impact people who love me, particularly my children. I could never do that to them.

Now, when I find the blackness closing in on my again, I take action. I do whatever I need to do - take meds, seek counseling, exercise, worship, etc., until it passes.

[Ilpirata]

I have never been suicidal myself. But I did lose my number one person to suicidee many years ago. PM me if you want to talk.

[Snippet]

My heart breaks knowing the absolute.... DESPAIR... some people must be feeling to make them want to take their own life.

I've been experiencing terrible mood swings lately due to the onset of menopause. A few months ago my doctor put me on some medication that, within, a few days caused my symptoms to worsen to the point that there was one Tuesday in particular in June 2007, that if I'd had a gun, I would not be here now.

Thankfully, I was able to get back to my doctor that same day and change my meds.

When a person is in the mode of despair, it seems like those feelings will never change, but they can and will. The person who is suffering must seek out help - I think the worst thing a person can do is try to handle it alone. It seems sometimes like there will be no end to the horrible feelings, and it's hard to remember that when in the throes of that horrific depression.